Wedding costs?

missile

What is the grooms father expected to pay for?

fluffnutter

Nothing...

fluffnutter

To elaborate... traditionally the bride's parents foot most of the cost. The groom (not his parents) has the following responsibilities:

Bride's engagement ring.
Bride's wedding ring.
Ceremony fees.
Organist, choir, bell ringers.
Marriage licence or registrar fee.
Bridal flowers.
Flowers for bridesmaids.
Flowers for the church.
Buttonholes.
Corsages.
Presents for the bridesmaid, usher and best man.
Transport to church for him and his best man.
Transport to reception for him and his new wife.
Bouquet for the mothers during his speech.
The honeymoon.

fannyanna

I think in today's modern world parents aren't expected to pay anything. If they would like to pay for something (maybe as part of a wedding gift) then I'm sure most couples would glady accept such an offfer.

If you can afford to pay for something and would like to do so ask your son and future daughter in law what you could help with. But do not feel pressured into helping out if you don't have the money or inclination to do so.

fluffnutter

Yes, missile's question is a little vague, and I answered purely from a 'traditional wedding etiquette' perspective. Personally I think it's totally archaic to expect anyone to pay for your wedding these days, particularly if you've been living together for five years, have two kids and a double income! If parents want to contribute, that's lovely, but it's hardly a 'right' these days to expect it.

The one that really gets me? Asking your guests to give you cash for your honeymoon. The height of rudeness IMO. Well done you, lying on your beach in the Maldives smug in the knowledge that your mates have paid for your holiday.

McKneff

My daughter and fiance have lived together for quite a while now and the costs are
shared between them, in laws and my OH and I.

We have given them some up front for deposits etc and the rest will be given when monies are due.

podperson

fluffnutter wrote: »

The one that really gets me? Asking your guests to give you cash for your honeymoon. The height of rudeness IMO. Well done you, lying on your beach in the Maldives smug in the knowledge that your mates have paid for your holiday.

Must admit it really doesn't bother me, a lot of people have lived together for a while before they get married and already have most things they need for the home. I dont agree with people 'having' to give gifts in that situations but if they want to give the couple a token why shouldn't be towards something they really want rather then them getting things they don't really need and will probably end up in a cupboard gathering dust.

berrydesouza

get the Cheap clothes with online shopping centers

doodoot

Your wedding, your cash.

If you can't afford to pay for it, then save until you can.

fluffnutter

doodoot wrote: »

Your wedding, your cash.

If you can't afford to pay for it, then save until you can.

Got to say I agree. And lower your expectations too. Weddings don't have to cost £20K. Perhaps you don't even need that fortnight in the Maldives courtesy of all your guests

suki1001

fluffnutter wrote: »

The one that really gets me? Asking your guests to give you cash for your honeymoon. The height of rudeness IMO. Well done you, lying on your beach in the Maldives smug in the knowledge that your mates have paid for your holiday.

I have been asked for cash for honeymoons before, this doesn't bother me in the slightest, this always comes with a get out statement if you don't want to give cash. I would rather give them some thing they wanted than part of a dinner set they didn't want.
I don't find it any different to a wedding list. In many cultures, giving money is part of the wedding celebration.
I didn't have a honeymoon, because I'm not a holiday person. We just stayed overnight in a hotel. I don't begrudge those who do want to go away and have a nice honeymoon.