So poor I can't even pay attention

*Robin*

Thank you, missrlr and the cake. :T Is this better:

[small dragonfly drawing on LH side of heading] Grasp the Nettle! [small dragonfly drawing on RH side of heading]

Reliable local lady with xx years experience, now has vacancies for new clients who would love to have a garden they can be proud of.

Grasp the Nettle! can tackle all gardening tasks, from simply tidying up to planning and creating an exciting new [floral?] design which will bring pleasure to all.

Special Offer 1: For bookings made by [choose date] - 20% off all plants supplied!

Special Offer 2: Reduced rates for OAP's and disabled persons who require regular garden maintenance [visits?].

Let Grasp the Nettle! do all the hard work while you sit back and enjoy your garden this summer!

Call Piquant on xxxxxxxxxxx so we can meet to create a vision for your outside living room.


:think: "Outside living room" ?? Needs a twist.

the_cake wrote:

One more thought - don't forget you will have to register as self-employed with HMRC

..Further not forgetting that if you can dedicate 30 hours a week to Grasp the Nettle! you will be able to claim tax credits to boost your income, Piq.

Skint_but_Optimistic

I would like the last piece to read So together we can create your vision for outside living.

Or is that like an Elton John Lyric?

missrlr

Nope like that ..... Good call

Caroline_a

Piquant wrote: »

Witty and interesting? I was planning on doing a traditional postcard ad to start with. Something along the lines of 'Lady loves gardening, would love to help you with yours'

Garden and plant maintenance, container gardening - flowers and veg
Reduced rates for OAPs
Call xxxx

Not even a picture on this one!

Ok. Now.... Piq... you know that isn't good enough, don't you? You're an intelligent woman with tons of ideas, and (sorry to be blunt) but that's rubbish! You've got to come out of the shadows now, and be proud of what you can do.

And besides which, if you market this right, you'll make a lot of money - Gordon Ramsey doesnt market himself as 'a bit of a cook', Richard Branson isn't 'Gentleman who likes business', and Margaret Thatcher wasn't a 'lady who talks a bit'!! Read Robin's shot at words for your card, play with them, spin them for yourself and hold your head up!

suburbanwifey

Caroline_a wrote: »

Ok. Now.... Piq... you know that isn't good enough, don't you? You're an intelligent woman with tons of ideas, and (sorry to be blunt) but that's rubbish! You've got to come out of the shadows now, and be proud of what you can do.

And besides which, if you market this right, you'll make a lot of money - Gordon Ramsey doesnt market himself as 'a bit of a cook', Richard Branson isn't 'Gentleman who likes business', and Margaret Thatcher wasn't a 'lady who talks a bit'!! Read Robin's shot at words for your card, play with them, spin them for yourself and hold your head up!

Wish you were in Scotland Piq, I have lots of land that I am going to turn into an allotment, currently looking for a gardener to do all that, I could offer you a full time job if you were located there I currently have a guy mowing all the grass (guy who lives in the village) but he's almost 70 so need someone younger for the rest of it. So sad you are so far away !!!!! you'd suit my needs and me you perfectly

Piquant_2

I think one of you has fed my diary 'growmore' :rotfl:

I have coir pots soaking in the kitchen sink ready for some black nasturtiums seeds. I also have two completed herb pots. Incidentally, the iridescent paint is lovely. All I need to do is paint some dragonflies;)

I remember telling you all what a talented and special writer robin was. See how right I am Robin, I am so grateful, I could never have come up with such a great bit of prose and the rest of you, missrir, cake and skint - thank you! I hereby promise to use this in future.

I did put up the rubbish one in a tiny village post office a couple of villages away. That was before I saw what you had done to help me. However, in my defense, I had to do it then or not do it at all. Confidence is not my strongest suit at the moment. Sorry caroline

Today I will prepare the new one and put it in my local store. I will also do some admin, must sort out the broadband/carrier pigeon, sky or BT perhaps. I'm also going to cancel the boiler insurance. Scary but the boiler's so old there's going to be all sorts of clauses to get out of fixing it.

The yard owner has reneged on our deal. I am no longer doing his garden and he wants payment for the Captain. I am moving him to a friend's place at the weekend. I will stay with him for a couple of days to settle him in. Unfortunately, this is miles away, which means I won't see him very much. He will be fine as my friend adores him. Once I get sorted on the gardening front and earning some money I can bring him nearer home. I am so sad about this. I didn't want to move him away from his home, let alone so far away. I have to do it quickly as it is horrible down the yard. The yard owner has made no apology for his turnaround, just instructed the manager to tell me. I don't want to talk about it anymore as it makes me cry

I wish I lived in Scotland too suburbanwifey, and I'd love to work for you too! Full time gardening would be just perfect.

PinotGrigio41

Piq,

I am so glad you found the confidence to pop the ad in the newsagents. Lets hope you get a few calls. Today is a beautiful day and when the sun shines it always makes me think about how my garden needs sorting out, so hopefully many others will feel the same way.

I wont rant on about whats happened at the yard as I dont want to upset you. The whole situation is appalling, but at least Captain will have a loving home with your friend and you know he will be happy and well looked after. Its clearly the best option for now but something that when things improve , which they will , can be resolved.

I hate you being sad with him being further away , but then the situation at the yard was going to upset you all the more if you had stayed there. Maybe this is all for the best in the short term.

Thinking of you and sending hugs and PG and chocolate your way xxx

*Robin*

Piquant wrote: »

The yard owner has reneged on our deal. I am no longer doing his garden and he wants payment for the Captain. I am moving him to a friend's place at the weekend. I will stay with him for a couple of days to settle him in. Unfortunately, this is miles away, which means I won't see him very much. He will be fine as my friend adores him. Once I get sorted on the gardening front and earning some money I can bring him nearer home. I am so sad about this. I didn't want to move him away from his home, let alone so far away. I have to do it quickly as it is horrible down the yard. The yard owner has made no apology for his turnaround, just instructed the manager to tell me. I don't want to talk about it anymore as it makes me cry

Piq, ((hugs)). Tbh it sounds like a great idea to get away from all the toxic people at that yard; up to you to make the change a good thing - which I think you're well on the way to doing.
Yes that means compromise; you are lucky you have a horse-savvy mate who can keep an eye on Captain at her[?] place for a while. So long as he's got shelter, a paddock and a supply of carrots given daily by someone who cares about him, he'll be fine in between your visits.
How far away is it? (I ended up 300 miles away from my last horse - many many years ago - when the company I worked for won a contract in Wales. That hurt, but she was ok - got fat during my absence though, lol).

Piquant wrote: »

I wish I lived in Scotland too suburbanwifey, and I'd love to work for you too! Full time gardening would be just perfect.

It's a ruddy shame you can't jump through the box, Piq, as then you'd be sorted for work!
..Could use your help here at the Nest too, getting the rest of the spuds and all the summer veg planted out, not to mention the war on weeds which is never-ending!

Caroline_a

Another one here who would love someone to help in the garden!

Confidence, Piq, will come from within. You've had your fair share of knocks over the past few years and I do feel that this could be a new phoenix moment for you! And you'll get all the support and help on here that anyone could want!

walkers60

How I agree with all the previous posters about Captain - nothing more to say.

I'm very pleased that you are getting the pots designed, painted and planted. They sound very unique and I'm sure you will have great success with them.

Also you have made the first step by putting in the post-card. The first step is the hardest - isn't that the title, or a line, from a song! If its not, then it should be!

Take care
Walkers