school help

TigersEye

I'm so sorry this must be very fustrating for you, but if you get angry or upset it can cloud your thinking.

Have you looked at this website:

http://www.education.gov.uk/

Is there anyone at his primary school could give you any advice?

Check out the schools website and see what it says.

Does your school have any pastoral care or anyone else you could talk to who could be described as impartial

gingin_2

What is the reputation of the school in general?

Become a nuisance, try and arrange weekly update meeting with his class tutor. Encourage your son to speak up to the maths teacher at the end of the lesson if he doesn't understand the work. You've got to be proactive here.

It is a shock, my son is year 7 too and it does seem a bit like throwing them to the lions. I think my son has been intimidated into submission, having been the class clown at his previous school and I know they also take no nonsense what so ever, from a child who is disruptive in the class. Does your son get warnings before he gets a detention? I think it's a 3rd warning here. If it's the same for your son why can't he get the message after the first couple of warnings?

I think deep down you know that excluding him from lessons/ detentions is not going to help him. Soon enough he will have to cope on his own in the big, wide world and it's your job as your mum to support him in becoming a productive member of society. He's going to have to function in the workplace and if he believes he can get away with not doing so because he's always had someone to cover his back in the past, he's not going to get very far.

a51_ufo

mrcow wrote: »

Rather than trying to fight the school, why don't you try working with them? Fighting them is going to give your son the wrong message completely.

I'm sure the support and advice you can give would be appreciated. Work WITH them to improve things.

Why is he getting detentions? Is it his behaviour, organisation, homework, or something else?

I agree with the above, work WITH the school. It sounds like he should be in a lower maths set and this should be picked up by the class teacher (low hwk \ test scores). Does he have anything on his IEP about the pencil sharpening \ elastic band ? The reason I ask is all IEPs I have contain specfic things the pupil is to (and the teacher to allow them to) do in certain situations - from being allowed to play with plasticine to having a card they hold up if they get stressed and need to leave the room for a brief period to calm down.

Oldernotwiser

Without meaning to be rude, did you have issues with your own school that are affecting your dealings with your son's?

cookie54

he is on report for poor bahavoiur ie drawing or figeting or losing his page and not finishing all his homework ie like maths sheets . i have written on sheets and timed each homework should be no more than 30mins but thats not go enough

The teacher needs to sign after each lesson to report what happened.

The lersson he struggles with are the none desk ones ie music and ict and cooking . He is ahead on ic and we cook at home so i am not too fussed about missing these.

Ths school now has a new head and is an acdamey and is the best one in the area for results !!!!!!!!!!

The form tutor reads of a report card and doesn't teach him and the head of year just wants to tick boxes and move on ..

CH27

How are you approaching them?

daska

I agree with above, for the moment you have to work WITH the school, request meetings, request explanations. Sod the e-mails and phone calls though, write them proper letters which they HAVE to respond to and keep a record.

We had a similar problem with DSD, a 20 minute math homework could take upward of 2 hours and she would insist on working on it until every answer was perfect - it was exhausting for all of us. We raised it again and again with the maths teacher and was always told she was doing fine. It wasn't until we refused to help and sent in a formal letter copied to her HOY telling them how long she had taken on it that she was given the extra support she needed to catch up. (It wasn't her fault and she's not thick but she'd attended 6 primary schools in the space of 18 months and had simply not covered everything that her secondary school expected her to know so didn't have the basic building blocks with which to work. We were trying to help her catch up but all our time was being gobbled by the keeping up with the homework.)

And request a meeting with the SENCO if you haven't had one already to find out why what was supposed to put in place to support him hasn't been done. If the SENCO won't help request a meeting with the Head.

meritaten

ok - your son has previously been allowed 'fidget management strategies' such as the rubber band and the pencil sharpening. he has an IEP.
You really need to see the schools SENCO hun - he obviously has issues which his previous school coped with - but this school doesnt.
The questions you need to ask are
Why isnt he allowed to use rubber bands etc to keep his hands occupied? why hasnt the school taken into account his previous school history? Why isnt he getting the support he needs?
My Aspergers grandson went to secondary school and was in trouble the moment he walked in the door! every day! the schools attitude was that 'He should conform' and nothing made them change their minds and DGs had to change schools -the new one couldnt be more different in attitude, and although its still a mainstream school - he is flourishing!
stick to your guns hunny - your child is NOT getting the help he needs and is legislated for him to get!

DorsetGirl_2

I understand he is struggling but you cant time his homework and cut it off at a point that you think is acceptable as this is sending the wrong message.

I agree you need to work with the school, no matter what you might think they want your son to do well. By putting up brick walls and seeing problems with everything they do you are becoming the problem.

cookie54

the thing with the homework is now long the school states each piece of homework should take