Mum has sudden amnesia and cant remember my dad!

Peanuckle

As for getting the urine sample, could you either ask for one of the "cardboard" style bedpans they use in the hospital and sit it in the toilet with the seat over the top to hold it down or even improvise with an old bowl (or even plastic bag) secured under the seat and take the sample from there once he's been?

motherofstudents

What an awful situation. I feel very sorry for you and them. My mum looked after my dad with dementia for 10 years and it wore her out. She finally agreed to let him go into care. I tried to help them but working full time it is very hard to do much. When he died she did very well and thank God was always mentally on the ball. She had lots of health problems and died recently. It is a very hard part of life and I hope you can get some help soon. Can you ask for a GP to visit them both at home ? I think you need to know what is happening to mum as it has suddenly come on. My first thought like the others is that it could be a TIA or urinary tract infection and I think you need to sort that out first. There are agencies who will help and you need to get assessments done. It's very sad and I do feel for you all but please do get any help you can. You may be able to get dad into respite care to give your mum a break.

WhiteHorse

betsie wrote: »

The dr says the blood test is too see if she is defiecient in certain minerals and vitamins that can effect memory.

It's a little too sudden for creeping mineral deficiency.

I'm sorry to say that a lot of doctors are too concerned with budgets. As a result, they mess around with minor tests when they should be grasping the nettle.

Mandles

That is weird for it to happen so suddenly and maybe a good sign for her. I have heard of even high blood pressure causing this so try not to worry , must be hard.

You sound like a good daughter. Hope it works out ok.

pearl123

Has you mum been neglecting herself. Ie lack of regular food and drink. Also taking her own medication. It really can take it's toll on the mind. I've seen older people who have forgotten to eat regularily really loose track of alot of things. I suspect you mum needs a routine which will keep her well. Regular meal times etc. Just and idea maybe?

Armchair23

Mineral deficiency etc., is just a nonsense. In a woman your Mum's age you'd look first at a minor stroke, urinary infection and diabetes. This isn't a slow change it's a sudden difference.
You're doing you're best and lord knows it's a hard task.
Nobody cares how you get the urine so do whatever seems feasible. A plastic jug a bowl whatever you think might do the job. Don't worry too much about how it happens, just hope it does.
At the age of your Mum & Dad there is no way way that they can cope (even with your help_) without outside care.
It's hard to start being a shouty persistent person if that's not what you're usually like but you may need to be right now.
All my heart goes out to you it's such a hard job. Good luck and let us know how things go.

mumoftwins

As your Dad has dementia I guess he will be under a Consultant at a Specialist Mental health Team for Older People? Please, please ring the Consultant's secretary first thing in the morning and tell them everything you have told us!!

It sounds like Dad could do with a spell as an Inpatient to regulate his meds and see what else is going on, but MORE importantly the Multi Disciplinary Team will do their very best to help your Mum too as things are obviously taking their toll on her now.

Would you do this please and let us know how you get on?

(I work for such a team and this is how we work).

PoorCharleyBear

my mother has dementia but is excessively confused when she does not drink enough. Apparently lots of elderly get this as they cannot control their bladder well and so consume less fluid. It can be quite sudden but rehydrating works wonders.

Also as others have said, urinary tract infection also causes confusion.
Hope it is sorted soon- it is very worrying to not know.

daska

When mum had urinary infections she went distinctly doolally in all areas whereas this appears to be a discrete loss of memory where everything else has remained the stable. My first guess would be a stroke but could it be selective amnesia? It's certainly worth pointing out to the GP that this is a very stressful time of year for her and asking the question.

betsie

Hi all, no dad is not under any specialist, doctors not really helped, but he has no memory at all. Can no longer read and would not remember if he has eaten etc.
Just mum and him muddling along - like an awful lot of old people.
We did get a sample and it was clear. An urgent fax was sent to hosp yesterday re scan so hopefully I will hear next week and an email was sent to social services re an assessment. Does anyone know how long I can expect to wait for this and whenI need to start chasing?
Mum going for blood test tomorrow, but I might ask if they can do a urine test as well. If she had had a stroke would it not have affected her in other ways? I really do think it is a stress/exhaustion thing.

Dad does seem a little brighter today and has been awake most of the day, he is eating a little and drinking well but not weeing much.

Mum went out shopping with my sister today and seemed alot perkier when she came back, she has never been a great eater, just picks, but she is eating and drinking (they both like their cups of tea).

I will let you all know how things progress. I am trying to stay positive, and I have lost 7lb in 4 days so not all bad (but not a diet I would recommend). It is amazing what you can do when you have too, I have never seen so much of my dads bottom as I have in the last few days!!!!

Thank you all for your support.