Family will - I would like some information

andygb

My mother died back in 2007, but before she died, she told me not to worry about inheritance or anything like that.
However, we are in 2012, and my sister (52 never lived away from home), is living with my father (80), and although they both know the solicitor dealing with the will, they will not tell me who the solicitor is, or discuss anything to do with the will.
They have both been on at least three holidays a year since my mother died, and I have received nothing (to be fair, I have not asked for anything).
I am not asking if I am entitled to anything, but should I be privy to some basic information about the details of the will?
Over the past couople of years, my father's behaviour has become more worrying (he decided not to renew his home insurance, despite the fact there is a small mortgage on the house, and disregarded my advice on the matter). He purchased a car from someone who was not the registered owner. He failed to turn up for my 50th birthday party, saying that he preferred to watch the rugby!.
He has phined up numerous times asking for help, but to be honest, I am not sure that I want to keep in touch with the pair of them.
Anyway, what should or can I do about the will?

Cheers,

Andy

Gigglepig

Awkward. Are you in England?

If a solicitor is dealing with the will, one would think they would have contacted you if you were a beneficiary? Perhaps your father inherited everything.

The erratic behaviour that you are mentioned in the post would make me worried for your dad but I don't see why it would make you not want to keep in touch with him or your sister? Unless they have done something nasty to you that you didn't mention in the post.

Link: http://www.justice.gov.uk/guidance/courts-and-tribunals/courts/probate/copies-of-grants-wills.htm

borokat

I think you can request a copy of the will from the probate office, I am sure someone who knows more will be along to give you the details. I'd have thought if she passed away in 2007 it would be all sorted by now.

SandC

Most married couples who have not remarried/had 'new' families as well etc. tend to leave everything to their spouse with instructions on what would happen if they died together (in an accident, say).

Your mother probably meant after both your parents had passed away you would have nothing to worry about.

I would just try to keep an eye on both of them and continue to give advice where you think it's appropriate. He does seem erratic as you say. However, he can spend his money however he wishes and if that means taking your sister on holidays then that's up to him.

Your sister may not even have seen her will - why don't you ask her?

When my dad passed away my brother and myself didn't expect anything different to what actually occurred - everything to my stepmother as his wife.

zzzLazyDaisy

Even if there was a will and it was a small estate (no property, small savings) there is no need to go to probate. So if the house was in joint names (joint tenants) the house would pass automatically to the husband and does not go through the will). Same with any bank accounts in joint names. So if she has less than £5000 in savings in her sole name, the will would not have to be registered with the probate office.

With a larger estate the will must be registered with the probate office and becomes open to the public. So the best place to start is to contact your local probate registry and ask them to check national records. If the will is registered you are entitled to a copy.

If a solicitor was dealing with the estate, then if you were named as either an executor or a beneficiary, you would have been contacted. If you were not named in the will, and the estate is too small to need to be registered, then you are not entitled to see the will. It may well have been that your mum and dad made wills leaving everything to each other, on the understanding that whoever went first would 'see the children alright'. Unfortunately that sort of arrangement is based on trust, and is not legally enforceable.

Plans_all_plans

I would be very surprised if your mum's done anything other than leave the house/assets to your dad, until such time as he passes away. You will have been contacted by the solicitor if she'd done anything differently.

I would say though that if my daughter had lived with me from day dot until she was 52, and my other children had married and were set up in homes of their own, I'd not be likely to say in a will that she should be moved out of the only home she'd ever known so that other children of mine could inherit. This would be particularly the case if I felt that inheriting was all the other children were concerned about.

Jinx

Plans_all_plans wrote: »

I would be very surprised if your mum's done anything other than leave the house/assets to your dad, until such time as he passes away. You will have been contacted by the solicitor if she'd done anything differently.

I would say though that if my daughter had lived with me from day dot until she was 52, and my other children had married and were set up in homes of their own, I'd not be likely to say in a will that she should be moved out of the only home she'd ever known so that other children of mine could inherit. This would be particularly the case if I felt that inheriting was all the other children were concerned about.

Id be the opposite, if I had 3 children and two moved out, assumed adult responsibilities and paid their bills for decades then they have just as much right to a share as someone who has had the benefit of a roof over his/her head without assuming householder responsibilities and probably the bills that go with it. Unless of course mum and dad needed a live-in carer.

andygb

Jinx wrote: »

Id be the opposite, if I had 3 children and two moved out, assumed adult responsibilities and paid their bills for decades then they have just as much right to a share as someone who has had the benefit of a roof over his/her head without assuming householder responsibilities and probably the bills that go with it. Unless of course mum and dad needed a live-in carer.

This is what I suspect is going to happen. My sister is not particularly trustworthy or consistent. She has never bothered with relationships, and has never taken any responsibility over paying bills or maintaining the property - cleaning, gardening. She does regard the property as hers, but unfortunately under UK law, I know that I have no say in the matter.
I wish that we had a similar situation to French law, where the children inherit equal shares.
Both my father and sister have received help from us over the years, but my father refuses to talk about the will with me.
Over the past few months, I have been considering cutting off all ties with them, mainly because of their recent behaviour and their thankless attitude.

seabright

If you were a beneficiary the solicitor would have been in touch with you as soon as they had been instructed - that's one of the first things we do.

So, either you weren't left anything or there is a will and they've never actually instructed a solicitor and notified anyone that your mother has died.

I suggest you get in touch with the probate registry closest to where your mother died and apply for a copy of the "Grant of Probate with Will Annexed". It doesn't cost much (around £10 from memory).

If you get it you will see what was said in the will and the Grant of Probate will also have details of the solicitor who acted for the estate (if there was one, you don't have to use a solicitor, maybe your father/sister did it themselves)

onlyroz

Unless your mother had significant personal savings, I wouldn't expect you to inherit anything until your father dies.

andygb

seabright wrote: »

If you were a beneficiary the solicitor would have been in touch with you as soon as they had been instructed - that's one of the first things we do.

So, either you weren't left anything or there is a will and they've never actually instructed a solicitor and notified anyone that your mother has died.

I suggest you get in touch with the probate registry closest to where your mother died and apply for a copy of the "Grant of Probate with Will Annexed". It doesn't cost much (around £10 from memory).

If you get it you will see what was said in the will and the Grant of Probate will also have details of the solicitor who acted for the estate (if there was one, you don't have to use a solicitor, maybe your father/sister did it themselves)

Thanks for your help, because it confirms what I thought, except that you have given me even more information.
I have reason to believe that my father (from what he has told me) was asked by my mother to look after my sister! This is strange in itslef, as my sister is an adult and has been working (on and off in one very specialist career) since leaving school. My father has also told me, that he is afraid, that if he challenges/argues with my sister, then he thinks she may leave the house. She is very overbearing/threatening, and to a weaker person may seem intimidating. He now seems to almost take instructions from my sister and never questions her decisions. If we ever question her over the phone, then she simply puts the phone down on us.
There is so much going on here, that it is difficult to recall everything, and to be honest, if I do so, then it may be recognised.