part 2 . .Dad died last week

Just_Plain_Jane

My mum lost consciousness at home after a heart op and although she died in hospital, they wanted to see what had gone wrong. It was three weeks between her death and the funeral.

My kids were on half term from school for part of that time, so we did things as a family to try and keep our spirits up and we talked lots.

Chunky-monkey_4

My dad was killed in December 4 years ago. We had to wait 8 weeks until we could have a funeral. This was due to the way he died though.

It's an extremely difficult time being in limbo, you don't know what to do with yourself and just need/want to get to that next step.

The way we delt with that time was to take time planning to get things right for us and him. We had regular family meetings which really helped having the communication channels open. We also had the funeral directors round to the house, even though we knew it would be a while until the funeral. That also helped. I don't know what else to say, it's awful I know, when there is nothing you can do to speed things along.

Deepest sympathys to you all. Look after each other xx

JCP

Total sympathy OP.
It is a horrible experience to be left in limbo like this.

It was the same for me when my mother died. It was the weekend before Easter, and due to the bank holidays and the local crematorium being closed for servicing(!) it was over a fortnight before we could hold the funeral.

It makes it very difficult to actually start grieving. Just know that whatever you feel is normal and valid - everyone grieves in their own way.
Condolences to you all.

Dazi

so sorry for your loss melymay. My dad died on 9th December this year, as he had already been in hospital a week there was no need for a PM, we had his cremation on 22nd, was glad it was before christmas. Really feel for you having to wait so long xx

doodoot

Lots of sympathy OP to you and your family.

Unfortunately a bereavement and coroner investigation at this time of year does tend to drag on for longer.

My Uncle passed away on NYD by heart attack but he also fell down into a stream, hence an investigation was done to ascertain the true circumstances.

If memory serves me right it was approx a month before his funeral occurred.

((HUGS))

poppysarah

My dad died on the 19th Dec and won't be buried until 12th January.
It took several days to get an appointment with the registrar.

GobbledyGook

At this time of year it's a nightmare. My grandmother died on Boxing Day and it felt like forever before her funeral. She was buried on January 20th.

We did choose the funeral director though and made all of the plans that needed to be made. Then when we knew when her body was going to be released it was just a case of setting the date.

I would just tell those who are asking that it is in the hands of the coroner and with the christmas holidays you don't know when the funeral will be yet. Most people will understand that when they think about it (they just may not think about it before they speak firstly).

cavework

Once the autopsy has been performed , if there is to be an inquest , the Coroner will open and suspend the inquest and release the body for burial once cause of death has been established .The full inquest will be held at a later date.

For information that may be useful to some .. you can obtain a Coroners report years after a death. It took me 30 years to apply for this , but it took me that long to 'want to know' if you see what I mean?
There were 2 people in the RTA which included my sister.. it cost £80 but it finally put things to rest.
Everything was included .. police reports , Photos of the accident, witness statements and the toughest part is the autopsy report,but sometimes this does give closure.
OP we had to wait for the Coroner to release the body for burial .. I understand and sympathise.
xx

killerpeaty

I'm so sorry that you're having to go through this melymay, it's awful having to explain to people that life is different now. The waiting is awful, my dad had a sudden massive stroke which left him in a non-responsive coma which we've been told he'll never wake up in early November. He is essentially dead and doesn't look like the man we knew at all, it is so hard to deal with the waiting and the grief at the same time. I sympathise as much as I can with you and hope you and your family will cope with all this.
x
(sorry no advice)

Deep_In_Debt

My uncle died on 20th April this year and due to Royal Wedding holidays and Easter, I was only able to get a funeral arranged for mid May. I was left to organise it all as my uncle and aunt had no children or close family and my aunt was and still is, in a nursing home. I did everything with the Funeral Director's by post, phone and email since they were a long away from me and I work full time and of course this delayed things a little too.