My Dad died Friday and . .

meritaten

hun - if a postmortem is needed its often a couple of weeks before you can have the funeral. Next year isnt far off - its less than a week now.
Its heartbreaking at this time of year because christmas is when we should be celebrating - not grieving! but, it happens and we must deal with it. if you have children then let them have their christmas fun and tell them later - then grieve. Its hard I know to keep your grief inside - but would the deceased want the kids to have their christmas spoiled? I know my uncle wouldnt have and thats why we didnt tell the kids until the day after boxing day. Uncle didnt get cremated (MILs choice) until well into January and he didnt have to have a post mortem.

jollymummy

Massive hugs to you OP. We were in a similar situation when my darling Dad died. It was just before the Golden Jubilee weekend, everyone was partying and we couldn't have him released from hospital or make any arrangements due to the long bank holiday.
We held it together as a family and although I'm not particularly close to my sisters, talking about it with them and knowing we were all supporting my Mum helped a bit. She was an absolute star.
It's a terrible thing to have to deal with, take care of yourselves.

GeeBee38

So sorry to hear about your sad losses melmay and merlin68

Sending (((big hugs))) to you both xx

victory

melymay take each day slowly, there is no book out there that can help you or yours, you do what you can to get by that is all you can ask of yourself.

rsdiscos

My dad died two years ago on the 14th of December his funeral was on Christmas eve in the bad snow. We used the time for planning the funeral as a celebration even though his death was in expected finding and agreeing songs to be played. We also scanned lots ofphotos and had them projection on the wall at the wake. They were good conversation starters and helped people remember the good times. Hugs to you Melissa

catch_me_if_you_can

So sorry to hear of your loss, Melymay and Merlin68. xx

Norma_Desmond

First of all, my deep sympathies to those who have lost someone recently. xxxxxx

My dear Dad passed away in October after a long illness (Alzheimers) and he'd been in hospital for a week; he died on a Saturday and we were 'lucky' enough to have the funeral on the following Friday as there was no post mortem or bank holidays to contend with.

I really feel for you OP - I was literally on auto-pilot that week arranging appointments with the hospital, registrar and funeral directors........and even now I'm not sure how I coped - but somehow I did even though I was bursting into tears at random moments and having to comfort Mum too.

I'm sure we're designed to have strength when it matters but the 'waiting' is the hardest part, harder even than the funeral itself, which was peaceful and a chance to say a proper 'goodbye'.

You may well feel odd in the days and weeks to come.......I actually thought I felt ok a few days after Dad's death until one morning I just started to shake all over and felt so weak I had to lie down - I think the mind/body can take so much until it rebels and it's then that you find your strengths.

Go with the flow - it'll be the worst time of your life for sure BUT you WILL come out the other side.

Bless you. xxxxxx

Carrole

Hi melymay,
Sorry to hear about your loss and pray that your father will rest in peace. I know how you will feel as my father died last year and I know how big loss is this.