The job or the kiddies :(

Comfort

Hi, I think i've already made my mind up on this but need to chat to someone on here, not directly connected to me and my family.

I had a little part-time evening job at the post office which was great whilst I raised my two children as Hubby could look after them for a couple of hours whilst I was at work.

Just before Christmas my old boss rang me to ask if I'd go back to work for him. Up in London, triple salary. The chance of clearing my debts quicker made me go for it, and I decided to put my kids into the school breakfast and after school club. Ive been in this job for 3 mths.

However, since taking the job I've had terrible problems with my eldest child and today I was called into school by the head mistress to advise that her work had suffered so much in the past 3 mths. She couldn't tell me how to deal with it, but I got the picture loud and clear.

In my heart I know I have to leave. I've worked it out that if I can save a certain amount by the end of March I will have enough to pay the mortgage until christmas when part time evening jobs will be in abundance. I can also pay off one of my credit cards by then too - the Tesco one. However, this will leave me £120 short of my loan and Barclaycard for which I will need £248 a month to cover just the minimum payment and I only have £128 left. I have to leave, for my kids sake, but if I don't get another job I'm really worried what will happen to these two debts.

Wiggly_Worm

You already know the answer, you said it yourself - "in my heart I know I have to leave". We're all in debt here, welcome to the club :rolleyes: BUT, who do you want to keep happy, Barclaycard or your children? I really feel for you, but you need to take a step back and realise that nothing, nothing in this world is more important than your kids. What would you rather they remembered about you - you were always there or you always paid the bills? It's horrible, I know. I'm kind of in the same boat, but without the offer of a job! I hate walking my daughter to school in her old scuffed shoes because I can't afford to buy nice new ones like all her friends seem to have. But at the same time, being able to pick her up after school and sit and listen to her read her assembly lines is priceless. I'm only just starting to realise that however I feel about myself, or even how much I love my children, THEY LOVE ME MORE. They need me.

With the debts, you can get help from all sorts of quarters - CAB debtline are brilliant. I went to them and they helped me write a budget, then gave me a template letter to send to all my creditors asking for my repayments to be reduced to just £1 a month. As it was backed up by the CAB (Citizen's Advice Bureux), they agreed! But I was assured that if they hadn't, CAB would have waded in on my behalf! Brilliant. And I'm sure on this site you will find loads of ways to stick your fingers up to the banks or whoever. Don't let them bully you. Be stubborn, be a pain in the !!!!. We'll help you! You have rights.

There are loads of people to help you manage your debts, but only you can look after your kids. You're doing absolutely the right thing. :T Yay for you!

in_debt_again_but_dealing_with_it

I agree with wiggly worm - the children are small for such a short time in the scheme of things - now is their time. You are definately doing the right thing.

Spendless

Comfort wrote:

Hi, I think i've already made my mind up on this but need to chat to someone on here, not directly connected to me and my family.

I had a little part-time evening job at the post office which was great whilst I raised my two children as Hubby could look after them for a couple of hours whilst I was at work.

Just before Christmas my old boss rang me to ask if I'd go back to work for him. Up in London, triple salary. The chance of clearing my debts quicker made me go for it, and I decided to put my kids into the school breakfast and after school club. Ive been in this job for 3 mths.

However, since taking the job I've had terrible problems with my eldest child and today I was called into school by the head mistress to advise that her work had suffered so much in the past 3 mths. She couldn't tell me how to deal with it, but I got the picture loud and clear.

In my heart I know I have to leave. I've worked it out that if I can save a certain amount by the end of March I will have enough to pay the mortgage until christmas when part time evening jobs will be in abundance. I can also pay off one of my credit cards by then too - the Tesco one. However, this will leave me £120 short of my loan and Barclaycard for which I will need £248 a month to cover just the minimum payment and I only have £128 left. I have to leave, for my kids sake, but if I don't get another job I'm really worried what will happen to these two debts.

Hi, how many times are the kids at the breakfast and asc? How old is your eldest? Have you found out why she is having problems? What about giving yourself x amount of time to find a p-time job that fits around the kids before quitting the one you currently have.

inmypocketnottheirs

Why not consider registering as a child minder. This is what my wife did to earn some extra cash and not have to put our children into a nursery. If there is a breakfast club and after school club in your area there is obviously a strong demand. Plus, you know, a lot of parents would rather put their child in a child minding situation as there is more continuous 1 to 1 care, plus generally it's cheaper.

It can be quite lucrative, if you can double of triple up, say having 2 or 3 children at a time. Admitedly it can get stressful, but say 9 quid an hour for 30 hours a week s 270 pounds a week. Maybe that would help balance the family budget a little. Plus child minding has widenened our own kids friends network.

For us it's worked really well.

Just a thought for you to consider.

Comfort

Thanks Wiggly

There really is no contest is there.

Although I have debts, I've never defaulted on them though, and so not meeting the payments is going to be new territory for me. I think I will go to the CAB once I've left work and see what they can do to help.

Does anyone know if I will be able to claim jobseekers allowance? I assume that if I leave of my own accord I won't be entitled to any other benefits.

Comfort

Spendless wrote:

Hi, how many times are the kids at the breakfast and asc? How old is your eldest? Have you found out why she is having problems? What about giving yourself x amount of time to find a p-time job that fits around the kids before quitting the one you currently have.

They start breakfast club at 7:50am each day and then are in after school club until 5pm each night.

She is having problems because she is so tired. She has terrible problems getting to sleep at night, and this has got progressively worse since I took this job. Its to the point where she is falling asleep in class and can't understand what is going on as she is so tired. She is 8years old spendless and my youngest is 5.

I will look for part-time now but think if I've not found anything by the end of March I'm going to leave anyway.

Comfort

inmypocketnottheirs wrote:

Why not consider registering as a child minder. This is what my wife did to earn some extra cash and not have to put our children into a nursery. If there is a breakfast club and after school club in your area there is obviously a strong demand. Plus, you know, a lot of parents would rather put their child in a child minding situation as there is more continuous 1 to 1 care, plus generally it's cheaper.

It can be quite lucrative, if you can double of triple up, say having 2 or 3 children at a time. Admitedly it can get stressful, but say 9 quid an hour for 30 hours a week s 270 pounds a week. Maybe that would help balance the family budget a little. Plus child minding has widenened our own kids friends network.

For us it's worked really well.

Just a thought for you to consider.

Its a thought yes, but I'm not sure if I could cope with lots of kiddies, its hard enough with my two. lol Thanks for the suggestion though, if times get too tough, I will probably consider it.

jenchin66

I've just seen a thread about AQA recruiting, could you do that?

chevalier

If you leave work of your own accord, then you won't get JSA straight away, but you do get after a certain time. Sorry I don't know how long this is.

Are you registered for all the benefits you are entitled to, like working family tax credits? This would help out with the finances?

Have you made sure that all your gas/electric/phone/broadband/car insurance/building and contents insurance are with the cheapest provider. If not, if you go via https://www.quidco.com, you get cash back on the deal.

Hope this helps
chev

Spendless

Comfort wrote:

They start breakfast club at 7:50am each day and then are in after school club until 5pm each night.

She is having problems because she is so tired. She has terrible problems getting to sleep at night, and this has got progressively worse since I took this job. Its to the point where she is falling asleep in class and can't understand what is going on as she is so tired. She is 8years old spendless and my youngest is 5.

I will look for part-time now but think if I've not found anything by the end of March I'm going to leave anyway.

Thanks for the response. I personally think 5 days a week both before and after school childcare is a lot and I wouldn't want it for mine regardless of who provided it and I'm very lucky that I don't have to, but I have nothing against a few times a week childcare. In your situation I think I'd also give myself till march to find something more school-ish hours. Good Luck with it.