Frump to Fab - Summer Solstice Sizzler

podperson

!!!!!! - crossed posted with you there. How extremely rude of that horrid woman :mad: I just find it beyond belief that some people seem to think that not only should they have an opinion on everything but that everyone around them wants to hear it! Sorry your playdate cancelled - apologies as I know very little about autism but is it possible her little boy got a bit anxious about doing something new and didn't want to go? Though, as you say, unfortunately things do just come up at the last minute sometimes. For what it's worth it sounds like you're doing an amazing job so please don't let things like this get to you. Are there maybe any support groups or anything in your area where you might be able to meet other mums in a similar situation - I imagine it can be quite hard to meet other people who understand the kind of things you have to cope with. Sending you *hugs*

Bitsy_Beans

Firstly have a hug !!!!!! xxxx

Secondly are you a member of any of the SEN groups in your area? They tend to operate events soley for children with SEN so you aren't relying on just one person, quite often they have sole use of the premises so the NT (neurotypical) aren't around.

Sadly there is a lot of ignorance around ASD and people are just downright rude. I know its easier said than done but try not to let it get your down too much. Have a wee cry and then pick yourself up again xxx
Every person with ASD is different, my DS doesn't struggle with big changes but heaven help me if I offer him a different form of pasta :eek: so whilst its a massive inconvience to you it might not mean the end of the world for her little boy. Cold comfort though I know xx

If you want to chat you know where I am, I know our boys are different but if you want a sympathetic ear my inbox is always open xx

LameWolf

Podperson good point about the age at which ears were pierced - my first holes were done when I was 16 and have always been fine. The 2nd ones were done when I was um.... a lot older,:D and I only left the earrings out for one day and they'd closed up so much as to need Wayne to redo them for me. Possibly the lupus was a factor, also.:o

WW now I know why I don't have a spare bed here, and only accept canine overnight guests.:rotfl:

!!!!!! much sympathy - I'm ter-twiddly-umpty-one years old, and I still can't cope if people change arrangements that are in place, so I appreciate how your lad feels. What a rude woman! If I were you, I wouldn't waste energy bothering about her (I know that's not easy, btw). Hey, I have no siblings, and I don't think I've turned out to be an ogre.:o
ETA Thinking about it, I'd have probably told the rude woman "sex and travel" (one of Mr LW's politer ways of telling someone where to go).;) There - that made you smile, I hope.:o

fedupandskint

Weigh in day today - STS again

On the good side I suppose due to the chocolate from Easter being eaten quite quickly. Plus did buy 3 creme eggs to day as a treat for the long run tomorrow too! Whoops!

Molly41

Rosetta92 wrote: »

Was also thinking about trying some earrings. haven't worn any for so long the holes may have closed. Wonder if I need to get them redone or can I just push some studs through? Anyone tried this?

Have a fab day everyone.

R

I resurrected my holes - goodness that sounds a bit :eek: - ear -ring holes at Christmas. I had them done when I was 16 but had not worn ear-rings for 20 odd years. Anyway I cleaned them with antiseptic wipes, sterilised some gold studs and pushed them through no problem. A bit of gunk came out but no bleeding or anything. They look fab now and Ive had no problems.

I think I have said before that I had an endometrial ablation - Bitsy. It worked wonders for me xx

Bitsy_Beans

Thank Molly, dr did mention it when I originally went to see her but she said it wouldn't guarantee solving the problem.....not making any decisions now will see how things go over next year.

lessonlearned

Bitsy - I loved the Cirque du Soliel. A quick tip though - take your own nibbles - the food and snacks are extortionate.

OH and I went in Manchester in 2005 before he became ill. The intention was we would push the boat out a bit - it was our wedding anniversary - and treat ourselves to a meal in their restaurant. So we arrived early.........

Bearing in mind it was 7 years ago, a glass of white wine was £7, whilst a cup of tea with UHT milk in a plastic up was £4. At that price we decided to share a cup of tea. It was undrinkable.

We ended up not eating there and going on to the "Curry Mile" after the show, where we ate like kings for a fraction of the price. The show was good though.

A tip for earrings. Wet your thumb and forefinger with your own saliva (I know - sounds disgusting) then place them either side of the hole and sort of wiggle around - I think it "lines up" the two sides if you get me.

!!!!!!

Re your son being an "only one" - as long as he has the opportunity to meet other children I see no problem. There's 11 years between me and my little sister so to all intents and purposes I was an only one for my formative years. My sister just has one child and she is perfectly happy.

My SIL daughter has Aspergers so I know a little. Although my niece does have a sibling it hasn't made any real difference to her social skills. She's now 26, she struggles in social situations and prefers to be quite solitary.

The problem is - as with any other form of illness or disability - unless you have direct experience with the condition it is very difficult to fully understand just what is involved. I have seen this over and over again since OH has been ill.

Before he was wheel chair bound many people just assumed he was drunk - i.e. slurred speech, wobbly legs. At first I got very upset, then I decided that instead of fuming I would tackle them head on. If I thought anyone was being judgemental I would just explain that he was ill with a rare neurological condition. They usually would then respond very kindly.

I wouldn't judge the woman too harshly - she probably meant nothing. And even if she did and was being nasty - that's her problem not yours. I agree with LW it's not really worth wasting your time and energy. However, I do think that sometimes we can be a bit quick to judge too - I know I can jump to the wrong conclusion at times. Sometimes we are so protective of our loved ones that we see slights and insults where none are intended.

I can truthfully say that apart from a couple of occasions in those early days when his symptoms weren't quite as severe as they are now, we have been shown nothing but kindness by everyone we meet. In fact, the hardest thing for me is - I can see the pity in their eyes - even seasoned medics can't hide it. Pity is so hard to bear.

Re the general public's lack of empathy and understanding. It's not their fault, how could they know what it's like. Good health - physical, emotional and mental, is something we just take for granted - until of course it fails.

In an ideal world, we would all spend a day in a wheelchair, or being blindfolded, or with special blocking out ear plugs - just to see what it's like and get a better understanding of the difficulties that disabled people face. It could be done in schools, but that's hardly likely to happen. I understand the Girl Guides do do something similar. DS2 and I have both tried the "wheelchair experience". It's a real eye opener.

mugwump79

thanks for all your support, we went to a park once with my son on a balance bike as he cannot ride a regular bike yet, an old man started laughing and pointing, saying "whats wrong wheres yer pedals" and kicked his front wheel when he was on it.
Luckily my son doesn`t understand half, if not more of what is said.

I was brought up that if you didnt have anything nice to say, to not say anything at all. Breaks my heart when people can be so cruel, hopefully karma will bite their bums one day:D

People just dont seem to care what they say, who they step on, what upset they cause, I am maybe too kind, caring, understanding, maybe I should toughen up,

thanks again for all your support, it means a lot

WelshWoofer

lessonlearned wrote: »

In an ideal world, we would all spend a day in a wheelchair, or being blindfolded, or with special blocking out ear plugs - just to see what it's like and get a better understanding of the difficulties that disabled people face. It could be done in schools, but that's hardly likely to happen. I understand the Girl Guides do do something similar. DS2 and I have both tried the "wheelchair experience". It's a real eye opener.

I teach science in a mainstream secondary school that has a large SEN contingent accommodating children with anything from ASD to deafness and blindness to other learning difficulties including Downs. I requested that I teach the group in year 8 that houses the majority of these children and I love it.
Only a few weeks ago we were covering "sound, ears, etc" and as we have hearing impaired children in the class I requested that the teaching assistant that supports the 2 deaf children (she's deaf herself) help me take the lesson. We played the hearing children a tape with varying levels of what people with different hearing impairments actually hear and got them to try to understand what was being said - very difficult. It gave them a real understanding of what the other two kids go through every day just trying to be in school and keep up with the others. Very revealing for them and I noticed a difference in the way they treat the "deaf" children.
I'm planning a dyslexia lesson too with some special worksheets that show what a dyslexic child sees. But as LL says its not a school policy just something I do to help my little class.

!!!!!! - I'm reading a book at the moment called The Boy That Fell To Earth by Kathy Lette (who has an autistic son). Its very good - I'm sure you'd identify with it. Funny and moving at the same time. Might help you feel that someone else understands?

WelshWoofer

With regards to the comments about the theatre/musical tickets..... I paid £51 each for the Phantom tickets and they weren't the best ones!:eek:
The theatre was completely sold out and is for the whole run - they must be making an absolute mint!
Completely ridiculous prices for what is essentially 2.5 hours of "entertainment". It was a treat for Mum though - won;t be happening again in a hurry:rotfl: