Sister being bullied

Poppy9

Tropez wrote: »

What does TOWIE mean?

The Only Way is Essex (Itv 2)

Tropez

Poppy9 wrote: »

The Only Way is Essex (Itv 2)

Ah, okay, thanks.

Never heard of it but if it is on ChavTV then I can hazard a guess as to what type of girls are doing the bullying here.

I think the advice is about right. Take screenshots, block the girls from Facebook and keep providing somewhere and someone for the victim of this to turn to and continue to monitor the situation while trying to boost the victim's self esteem and confidence.

katerinasol

Thanks for the advice everyone I'm not going to tell our parents before talking to her, I want her to trust me and not just become another 'figure of authority', but we will take screenshots and if it starts again after the holidays I will convince her to tell them and to go to the school.

mrcow

That's absolute rubbish about the school btw.

Of course she doesn't need to sit next to the person she thinks is bullying her. She needs to tell her form tutor and tell them that she's going to tell her teachers that she needs to be moved. Of course the school can cater for disagreements between pupils - it's what they do every day! To move a pupil in a class takes about 10 seconds. Any normal teacher would do it in a heart beat.

She needs to go into school and tell them that she's not to sit next to xxxxx. Take a letter from your Mum or a note in the planner will suffice. She doesn't need to tell her about the bullying (although i would STRONGLY suggest it) just that the girl has been saying horrible things and it's affecting her work.

katerinasol

I agree, I was shocked when I heard about it as well. Of course, I don't know how she phrased it, she may have downplayed it but it shouldn't be happening. Again, thank you all for your advice, you've been really helpful I'm taking her out for a meal on Friday to cheer her up and will have a chat with her about the whole thing then.

marywooyeah

katerinasol wrote: »

I agree, I was shocked when I heard about it as well. Of course, I don't know how she phrased it, she may have downplayed it but it shouldn't be happening. Again, thank you all for your advice, you've been really helpful I'm taking her out for a meal on Friday to cheer her up and will have a chat with her about the whole thing then.

what a lovely big sister you are I'm sure she'll love it

meritaten

I am pleased to see that you plan on dealing with this firstly by allowing your sis to try and then if that doesnt work by telling the parents. Dealt with it must be! you sound like a lovely caring sis - good luck to you both!

jpwhittle

I feel your pain i really do, i was so badly bullied at school its unreal, half of the stuff i went through sounds like something from a script it was so bad, i was degraded to the worst level anywhere. I remember the one time i stuck up for myself another group of girls went for me for doing it. I also remember 1 girl knocking on my door one day for me to go outside so she could batter me, and because i wasnt so stupid she stepped in my house and hit me anyway. Life is aweful when you dont feel safe anywere.
Now as a 31 year old i still live under the grip of what they did to me, i have no self confidence, im the ugliest girl in the world and completly hate myself. My saving grace is my 2 gorgeous children and that i have acheived far more in life than 3 quarters of them. Most of them are still in the same town, no hopes or dreams or aspirations, still living in the same street they did then and have 3 kids to 6 dads (yes i know its not possible its the fact they dont know who the dad is). While I am married to an amazing man have 2 stunning children own my own house wich i rent out while travelling the world with my husbands okish job (he's a soldier). So when i look at life guess who got everything they always wanted but was always told they wouldnt get?
My problem as i say is that those comments and beatings didnt stop on that last day at school they stll plague me now, and i wish i could get over it. But now i focus on not letting my babies go through the same as me. Ive been told im a bad mum before because i encourage my kids to stand up for themselves and not be brought down, but i dont want them to be like me at my age.
Please go and see her teachers with the proof of what has been going on, it does seem schools are stricter on bullying these days than they were, but also encourage your sister to be confident in herself. These people are nasty spineless witches that need stopping in the tracks, like others have said they arent very often the ones that achieve anything in life, they just like bringing others down with them, the best thing she can do is rise above it all and be the very best she can be
Im sorry if this doesnt make sense i just hate bullies with a passion

A_Phoenix_of_Tangerine

jpwhittle wrote: »

...

(((Hugs)))

To the OP, you sound a really special sister. I can't add much to what has already been said, but I understand what your sister must be going through, and it must be such a comfort that she has the love and support of her big sis to keep her going through all the bleakness and isolation.

Definitely advise her to limit her facebook bubble to real friends and family only, and make her profile an impenetrable fortress to outsiders! Maybe go through the privacy settings with her so that she doesn't overlook anything by accident.

Perhaps she may benefit from some physical confidence-building classes outside of school hours, such as self defence classes in the evenings? They are quite often free, and it could be something really beneficial that the two of you could do together. Just a thought.

Hope your sister finds some much needed respite from these nasty hyenas. Just keep reminding her that there IS a silver lining once she has made it through school, and then she'll no longer have to deal with them on such a cloying basis (for these types seldom have the aspirations or ability for college, and the few that do tend to sober up and drop the bullying when surrounded by their more 'mature' minded peers).

Merry Christmas to you x