Boosting self-esteem

mgdavid

from a male perspective: gosh some of you girls don't half carry a burden, I don't envy you!
But may have a perspective that assists in some small way as your problem is common to both sexes.
When comparing looks vs. attitude, ATTITUDE wins every time !
Be a bit selfish, cocky even; who is the most important person in your world? - YOU (ergo, the rest don't matter).
You have found someone who thinks you are gorgeous - then you ARE gorgeous in his eyes (and the rest don't matter).
There is no such thing as the 'perfect person' either physically or mentally; we are all a bit odd! Would you really want to be admired and loved for just how you look, or for your brain and personality and actions and deeds?

reheat

I'm nearer to 60 now than I like to think, and I used to have a really acute self esteem problem, which I've slowly worked on over the years ... and these days life is very good for me. I was never a looker, so never really had to worry about my looks fading, though years ago I was convinced my problems would all be solved if the girls simply fell at my feet ... :rotfl::rotfl:.

You say "I have a new relationship with a man who, to put it bluntly, fancies the pants off me, and I can't understand why." I am an engineer, and its in my nature to always understand and be able to explain things. But one of the most important things I ever learnt was that there are some things in life it far and away best you just simply accept and don't question - especially when it comes to relationships. I'm not trying to preach, but sincerely trying to help - just accept his attraction to you, that in itself will make you even more attractive (I'm a man - I know ). The fact he is attracted to you is all that matters, not why! Please don't do the opposite. If my wife occasionally runs her self down, I gently chide her to "not insult my wife".

In my younger days I used to worry over why most women were not attracted to me. The notion that a woman would worry over why a man was attracted to her ... would have eluded me completely. I'm struggling with it now I must admit. I would guess it's more likely if you've lived a life knowing you are attractive?

Hopefully this does not sound sanctimonious, not meant to be.