A new 'tougher' thread... and so it continues

Byatt

Fuddle, back in the 90's I no longer had a car (ex gave it to nephew, long story), so although not far from the city, both my DD and I walked everywhere, I lost a load of weight and was much fitter. But it is hard, especially in the winter months or awful rain and especially when you have toddlers. There's no shame in admitting you miss having a car, and maybe if you need to get one again, then don't be afraid to do so. Would a bike be an option?

Popperwell

Life in a so called modern and rich country eh Fuddle?

Well, I think I mentioned going to the theatre as treat to see Joe Brown in October all being well(7 miles away)It may be my last chance to see him and I think he'll sing one of the songs I had at Mum's funeral(and I'll be affected I know)anyhow...I'll try and use a bus one way but its a heck of a walk to the theatre so I may have to add a taxi on(both ways) so that's an extra £30 on top of the ticket, no wonder such an outing is rare.

There probably won't be a bus when I come out of theatre or again its getting from the venue to a bus stop and how safe I feel as the night goes on...

Popperwell

GinnyK,
A taxi firm is two streets from here as are the shops and because walking is difficult I often have to call one both ways(without a tip)it costs £2.50 each way!

I pay for it later but I do try and walk one way and it gets me out. It also means that the taxi is only used one way returning with shopping perhaps too heavy to carry and walk with at the same time. And taxi money saved also can mean it goes towards something like food or a jumper at the charity shop.

fuddle

That's what we said, if I need a runaround then we'll save for one but I don't actually need one. I can get around with my feet and it's just a very expensive bit of kit to make my life easier. I have been thinking about a bike but I'm so scared as part of the route is on a 60mph stretch. I dare not ride on the pavement. Who knows, after my counselling I might feel ok about riding on the road.

DH is putting me on the company car's insurance but I'm petrified to drive it. It has a button for a handbrake and electronic anti roll forward and roll back... it failed on a steep pass in the lakes (Hartstone Pass if you know it) I am so surprised I didn't soil myself that day! It also cuts out completely when it stops at traffic lights to save petrol. Weird machine. I'll need to somehow get my confidence up and would never drive it without DH there (i'll need him to say have you pressed the handbrake button!) I can feel my anxiety soaring just typing this :rotfl:

SpikyHedgehog

kidcat wrote: »

Welcome sunshine.

Popperwell, I still have a box of my grandfathers paperwork that I have decided to keep. If nothing else it will be good for the kids to look back at bills etc and see how prices have changed. Its also very strange to see old phone bills pre BT etc.

Ginny - has the weather changed or is it due to change, it could be that your OH is responding to weather pressure changes. Hope he feels better later.

When the torch passed through town and I didnt go, I did wonder if it was wrong of me not to take the kids but I was required in school to support DS8 and he would not have coped with it all. Therefore no-one went.

Have been busy again here retaking the house, Ds14 was also persuaded to build my mini greenhouse - which I bought ages ago but have never got around to putting up. DS has built it and I have put the purple sprouting broccoli plugs in after splitting into individual pots. (15 plugs £1.99 in ald!)

Has rained all day so washing all over the place and some in dryer - and now the sun comes out!! Typical.

Being very disciplined and getting meat out of freezer for meals in time saving me from needing to go shopping which has helped, this week is bill week and there was not enough money in bank to cover all - quite simply the length of OHs absence from work has depleted our meagre savings. I have swapped some things around a little but it means we have no money until Thursday so I have got to be very careful.

It does put me in a quandry though, when I took Ds8 to school friday they gave me a letter for a trip this week, it needs paying by tomorrow. I was also told I had to attend in order for him to go - now this brings several issues. Firstly I am supposed to attend a funeral that day (feels like deja vu!) to support my mum (its her best friend and someone wh has always been very supportive of me). Secondly whilst I want to support school I am not sure I am comfortable with the idea that I have to attend. Finally, I actually cant pay - no money at all until Thursday without resorting to my dad.

Grrrr!! I hate these decisions because whatever I do I cannot win I reckon its going to some down to which one means I lose least!

I haven't been on here for a while, but I know your battle with the school to support your son is an on going one, but this is totally not on. You know if you go in & say he can't go, they'll say, 'Well, we need you to come & support him staying in (different class) then as (usual staff) will be on the trip with the other children'. Stand your ground & tell them you'll be at a funeral so won't be on the trip, so by their terms your son won't be going, such a shame. If they can accommodate him, please let you know & you'll send in the permission slip, but the money will have to wait till Thursday.

Popperwell

Thank you for that Preparedathome,
I've been advised that I can put off claiming Mum's money for quite some time so plan to carry on as I am for as long as I can before applying for Mum's savings. This came from the CAB. My plan is to get what I can whilst I can that is money and things for my home.

Then when things are tough I have them as they'll have to last me years.

The threshold for receiving help before it removed is too low(or rather it is withdrawn too soon)and that is whether you work, are ill, retired or are unemployed. That extra money could mean you eat better, can heat the house for longer or replace items that need repairing or replacing, those emergencies but they make you go down eventually to around £8,000 or less so they make you poor and with the changes coming when you apply for help, it may not be there. Another reason for delaying things a little longer.

As your friend can obviously testify.

And I have talked my situation over with the CAB and other organisations a few times...and been told I am doing everything as I should.

The bank has just realised the money to pay for Mum's funeral from her estate...approx £3,000.

If the Co-op solicitors had handled the probate they were going to charge another £3,000...I said no...If I do it myself I think it will cost around £200. Quite a difference...

Ginny, you are right it is a case of stating facts which sadly aren't good.

smileyt_2

Hi everyone and Ginny, yes it was Dogs' Home today. I got absolutely soaked cycling the five miles up there and was congratulating myself on getting up a hill when a fit young thing on a proper sleek road bike went wooshing past at the same speed I would be going at if I was going downhill ...... :rotfl:. I have to say I have felt very much calmer today and my head hasn't been as mashed so maybe a ten mile bike ride plus three or four miles walking is what I need every day .... :eek:

The Dogs Home - I think I will enjoy it as long as I don't get too attached. We were warned not to walk the same dog every time, to avoid a broken heart. They don't pay volunteer expenses as they can't afford to, nor is there anywhere to brew up because most volunteers are local and just pop in for an hour to walk the dogs. So I will take a flask of tea with me, that isn't a problem. Every volunteer starts as a dogwalker and then if the staff learn they can trust you there are opportunities to do more, like grooming and matchmaking with prospective adopters. Oh, there were some gorgeous dogs waiting for their forever home . The oldies especially touched my heart. Apparently the Dogs' Home are getting more and more elderly dogs left tied to the gate overnight and abandoned as the recession hits harder. I came home and kissed my two oldies and promised them I would starve before I gave them up (nb I would starve - I would get them food from somewhere!).

I caused a few heads to turn this afternoon when I got back. I went to Argos to collect a petrol strimmer (I am hoping to attack the Superweedtriffids on my allotment) but it was much bigger and heavier than I expected. So I carried it home by balancing it variously on my shoulders, hips and head. One guy slowed his car right down to watch as he went past, with a look of amazement on his face. I guess it's not every day you see a 4ft 8" woman balancing a petrol strimmer in a box on her head :rotfl:. I haven't unboxed it yet as I am tired. Now I have to work out how to get petrol. I have bought a petrol can, two-stroke engine oil and a funnel. I know it sounds odd but I haven't a clue how to get petrol. Do I just go to a petrol station and put the pump nozzle in the can? I've never driven so I've never used a petrol pump! I don't even know what petrol looks like - is it black or is it colourless?

A while ago someone on here mentioned climate control duvets (or something like that) and how the dog had ruined theirs. Aldi are doing them in their specials today, double duvets and king-sized. Might be worth a look (and banning the dog lol!).

Kidcat, I don't know a lot about your financial situation, but apparently a lot of the energy companies (E-on definitely) have hardship funds which can be used to clear utility or rent arrears. I wonder if there is anyone at an autism charity who could advocate on your behalf if you need a helping hand financially, to pay for school trips and such-like. It might be worth a go.

Ginny, I hope OH is feeling a bit better tomorrow. Beans on toast is such a great comfort food .

Well I have wittered on! I'd better go and do my washing-up as it's starting to take over the kitchen (mainly cups and little side plates but I'll feel better if it's done before I go to bed). I have a tenants' panel meeting tomorrow where I'm going to pitch my budgeting club/course so I need to do some preparation for that too.

Sweet dreams everyone xx.

ETA Popperwell I think the capital limit is £16,000 isn't it? They do take savings into account above a certain amount (£3000? £8000?- not sure - I think it varies for different benefits). It would be worth finding out for sure and then you know where you stand. xx

meme30

If the Co-op solicitors had handled the probate they were going to charge another £3,000...I said no...If I do it myself I think it will cost around £200. Quite a difference...

Popperwell:-I did the probate forms after my Dad died. Was really surprised how simple it was. I needed a solicitor to sort the House stuff and that cost a couple of thousand pounds. Goodness knows how much he would have charged to do the probate. :eek:

smileyt_2

Just popping on to post this marvellous, crafty idea for using old Barbie dolls .... http://gesehenundgesehenwerden.blogspot.de/2012/06/barbiegaderobe-tutorial.html

It's in German but easy enough to follow. How creative is this woman?:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

prepareathome

Well am falling over myself with tiredness but in that kind of mood where I don't want to go to sleep - does that make sense.

All week been trying to hypnotise myself to be ok this weekend as was DGDs 13th Birthday and I have had daily phone calls and numerous BBMs about how I must be there - its was 4pm till late as put on the invitations

So we got there at 4pm on the dot and we ended up going home at 1am - you see her actual birthday wasn't till, today Sunday, so although for sake of little ones cake was done around 6pm, we all had to be there for midnight when cake was done again. Actually apart from son having to take our youngest DGD - age 2 home around 10.30pm as she just had to go to bed everyone stayed including DGS age 7 ........

I had totally forgotten it was sisters, sons, daughters ( her DGD) birthday tomorrow and she would be 4 so had not bought her a present, but sister was having a birthday tea for her today as son is up for the week visiting with family. So this afternoon when I managed to get up ( had fallen asleep around 4am as was so psyched up yesterday took me a while to get down) around 12.30pm got ready and just before 4pm went off to argos and bought a Hello Kittie dolls pram as the little one adores Hello Kittie - got it half price as well so very pleased. Then we picked up DGD ( she wanted to go with us but couldn't go earlier as going out to lunch with her mum and dad - we could have gone with but that was just one thing to much for me and even hubby didn't feel up to it) at 4pm and then went to sisters. Just saw youngest sister before she set off back to London with her son - had come up for the party, and we gave the present, stayed for a bit then home and I then climbed into bed around 9pm and have just been catching up on-line and fighting off sleep.

Had to share as usually all I do is moan - sister lives about 20 miles away but we have nothing what so ever in common so rarely see each other - years ago we lived across the road from each other and had plenty in common.

Just two not so nice peices of news over weekend, a couple whom we know through hubbys bowls, we went to their wedding last year had to turn off life support machine of their premature daughter - she had been fighting hard but then had a brain bleed and nothing could be done, so awful. Also wife of sisters son ( the one whose daughters birthday is tomorrow) is a step relation to the girl age 20 who was murdered the other day, the one who would have given birth in a few days, that is one of the reasons they came up to get away from the press as they are hounding the family, will not leave them alone during this awful time. They are hoping now the guy has been arrested they will be left in peace at least until the court case.

Fuddle I love your meal plan - I have written some out in past but after a few days I always end up feeling I want something that is not on it at all so gave up.

Weather here has been sunshine and showers - when it poured the kids just stayed happily on bouncy castle ( although before we left we had a downpour that did turn road into raging torrent and we thought we would have to put wellies on to get to car as it came right up path and was lapping at step into house, but after 30 min sun came out and everything dried up) then we had this twice more at party. Today more dry than wet.

Son has still not cut my grass and so it now is about 4ft high so will have to be strimmed before even petrol mower will go through it I think so will have to buy a new strimmer as motor is going on mine, will do the small areas round the vegetable beds but not the rest.

Right going to actually go to sleep now...........

Hugs, Love and healing
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