Is her ex supposed to pay maintence

seven-day-weekend

She is actually making a choice to stay there isn't she? She is not looking for more work so she can rent somewhere else.

So I think it maybe suits her to have no housing costs in a nice house.

If all the money from her home went into 'living costs', what was happening to the wages???

There is something here we don't know,I think.

neverdespairgirl

melly1980 wrote: »

Anyone who knows even the first thing about negotiation knows that you look for win / win scenarios. She is forcing a win / lose in her favor when she already has a win / win.

She has a free house, gets to live the same life as do the kids and can claim a variety of benefits that wont count the free house as income.

I'm not sure it's quite win/win. I'd feel rather uncomfortable about my ex letting himself in, helping himself from the fridge, plonking his backside on the sofa and watching TV, etc. Wouldn't you?

skintandscared_2

Killmark wrote: »

Bad advice as you have no idea what the repercussions could be.

As for people suggesting she try and obtain a portion of the property or ensure rights to live there till the children are 18 there are somethings you might want to consider.

1. There is no guarantee that legal action would succeed and whether it succeeds or fails he might try and force a sale.

2. If she ends up with capital and ends up not living within the property her benefits would likely be affected and she'd probably end up spending a large portion to cover her rental housing costs. Her chance at getting her own mortgage would be slim to none.

3. If she stayed in the house till the children were 18 she could end up being forced out then and due to age might find it impossible to get a mortgage so just end up renting.

She'd be better off trying to accumulate savings and when the children are of school age get better paid full time work, then she's in a better position to start rocking the boat and maybe even buy the property from the ex or find her own place.

It wasn't advice, it was a question. The "why" is a clue...

neverdespairgirl

Friend needs proper legal advice, OP. On selling her own house, contributing, maintance, etc.

melly1980

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

I'm not sure it's quite win/win. I'd feel rather uncomfortable about my ex letting himself in, helping himself from the fridge, plonking his backside on the sofa and watching TV, etc. Wouldn't you?

If you look at when I made the win win comment, the information at hand said that he simply didnt pay for maintainance but she got to live in the house for free.

The win win here is that the kids get to live in the same area, she doesnt pay for rent, and this isnt taken into account for any benefits so she will get the full hit. He wins because he keeps his house as an investment and gets to see minimal disruption to the kids.
There was no other information at the time that I wrote that.

Catden_2

Wow hot stuff sounds like people are taking one side or another. Best thing lady can do, thinking of the 2 children as well. Is get things on a legal footing as I would feel very vulnerable.
I am quite shocked at some people attitude so judgmental.

melly1980

Catden wrote: »

Wow hot stuff sounds like people are taking one side or another. Best thing lady can do, thinking of the 2 children as well. Is get things on a legal footing as I would feel very vulnerable.
I am quite shocked at some people attitude so judgmental.

I dont see what the issue is. I have judged for one reason only, the attitude that this guy wasnt paying anything to her. The attitude beggars belief because she is living in his house free of charge. It doesnt matter what his mortgage is etc etc, that act has saved her rent of a few hundred pounds per month at least (possibly more) if she wasnt there he could make money by renting it out and so on. Therefore he is contributing, despite what some have said.

sharnad

Bootsalebargains wrote: »

Thanks for all the input, I understand what your saying about the house and if she moved she'd have to pay rent if her Hb were stopped, but surely just because he owns the house he's got no right to go in while she's out eating her food and using her electicity etc.
He has quite a high up job and owns another 4 houses which are paid off (he used to brag about this)
I've tried telling her she will not meet anyone new while she is still living under his roof and he's showing up all the time

She should claim child maintence from him, get her own place she would end up better off finacially as long as he pays, she should also see a solictor as to what rights she has to the house she is living in.