In Law family probems stressing me out!

princeofpounds

Just out of curiosity and nothing more why do people always when a family dilemma come up say to continue sending cards, is that somehow touching base with an estranged family but not seeing them?

Basically yes. It's relatively low maintenance, non-invasive but has a personal touch. It makes it much easier to get back into touch should you want/need to later on without it being so awkward.

brians_daughter

in laws... just carry on with your oh and your family ie the children. The family is suppossed to offer support, love and warmth not the opposite.

re the party. yes do organise something if you wish to and simply send them all an invite. if they turn up - great, if they dont so what? your oh will have the people who amtter most to him there.

A good way to look at this was if they were friends not family would you put up with such behaviour? I suspect not.

I am not saying fall out with them by any means, but simply accept they hold different values than you and some people are too different to have any common ground

Good luck op

CH27

You have to let your husband lead the way on this. They are his relatives.
Sit down with him & ask him exactly what he wishes to do about xmas, birthdays etc & stick to it.