Boarding the Bus of Positivity (for 24 months of travels!)

debtfreesomeday

Ok, worked the budget out wrong! (again, can you tell I didn't get a lot of sleep last night!)... we will have £250.82 left every month if not overdrawn. £137.24 this month due to overdraft.

Here's an SOA... notes are at the bottom as not all totals are technically correct...

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet
Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 1
Number of cars owned.................... 1
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 636.77
Partners monthly income after tax....... 1037.21
Benefits................................ 121.19
Other income............................ 200
Total monthly income.................... 1995.17
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 0
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 380
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 118
Electricity............................. 30
Gas..................................... 38
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 34
Telephone (land line)................... 20
Mobile phone............................ 43.92
TV Licence.............................. 10.62
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 10
Groceries etc. ......................... 200
Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 200
Road tax................................ 20
Car Insurance........................... 20
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 20
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 20
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 4.91
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 20
Central Heating cover................... 19.5
Total monthly expenses.................. 1208.95

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 0
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 0

No Secured nor Hire Purchase Debts
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Loan...........................10449.6...435.4.....7.6
Credit Card....................1439......100.......0
Total unsecured debts..........11888.6...535.4.....-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,995.17
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,208.95
Available for debt repayments........... 786.22
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 535.4
Amount left after debt repayments....... 250.82
Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 0
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -11,888.6
Net Assets.............................. -11,888.6
Created using the SOA calculator at www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using IE browser.

Now, hubby does earn more than that, but he pays gym fees of £21 a month, pays for car parking at work @ £16 a month, £10 a work for other work fees, saves £30 a month for Christmas and birthdays and has about £60 left for other spends of a month, although he often throws more into the bank account if needed or treats us to coffee/a takeaway etc if there's nothing else to pay for. This works for us.

Rent, is to my parents who own our house.

Mobiles are for mine & hubby's phones at £21.96 each a month.

I haven't included childcare of around £400 a month as our childcare voucher money of £400 a month (in total) is deducted from both our salaries before it gets to us, so not included in SOA as we never see the cash!

Car/Tax/insurance/maintenance etc we save £100 a month, so I've just spread £20 a month amongst these on here to make up the £100.

Gifts/haircuts/entertainment/clothing and everything else comes out of the money we have left over a month, no specific amounts are saved towards this. I tried this once but ended up with so many savings 'pots' that it was all too much!

The entertainment listed is a lovefilm package that hubby also pays for.

Phone and internet combined is usually around £25 a month, but have allowed for £30 as sometimes it's nearer that amount.

Think that's all. This is more as a record for myself anyway to see where we are and what we can improve on. Hopefully it will look a lot better in the future!

debtfreesomeday

As it's payday, another loan payment will come out of the bank this week (usually the 1st), so that's another month ticked off. We shall be debt free in UNDER 2 years (or 23 months! ).

Signature will be changed shortly to reflect this month's loan payment. Will change credit card total once hubby's wages hit the joint account and I pay the £100 off the card for this month.

Was hoping to do some surveys tonight but WAY too tired now.
They'll have to keep for the weekend now.

Night all.

DFSD

Itsadogslife_2

I have to say, I completely agree and understand how you feel being on your own. My mental health really suffered when I was on maternity leave and we were in an area where I didn't really know anyone. You are really lucky that you have a close relationship with your parents even though they live far away.

Now I have been here for a few years, I think I would cope better being out of work, I think having a job gets in the way of my social life Will you have the little one when you are off for a bit, or will he still go to the nursery? You could always do some voluntary work?

debtfreesomeday

Thank you Itsadogslife. You don't know how much it helps to hear someone else say they felt like that too. I'm not saying I am pleased you had a similar experience as I wouldn't wish the feeling on anyone, but it's nice to know I'm not abnormal. Several friends of mine have also had babies whilst I have been off and they have raved about the lovely time they are having and how easy it all is, whilst I have felt like a complete failure and some sort of freak as I have found it so difficult and so terribly, terribly lonely. I haven't felt like I can say anything to them as they would think me a terrible mother. It's got to the point where I can't bear to hear them gushing about their maternity leave any longer and I am aware that I have withdrawn myself a little from contacting them. It's terrible, I know, but listening to them rave about the good times and fun they were having was having a really bad effect on me. That sounds awful.
I love Ds more than life itself, he is amazing and I'm so thankful we have him, but the period of maternity leave itself was just so miserable. I hope people reading this understand and don't think it reflects on my wonderful son at all.

No, Ds will still go to nursery as he loves it and has settled well there. It is good to let him socialise with other babies and children too, I believe. I don't want to risk disrupting his routine and as we have to pay for it anyway, there is little point in taking him out.

Hubby mentioned voluntary work this evening too, so it's something I am going to look into. I'm not sure if anyone would be interested in me if I can only offer 12 weeks of work on a Monday, Tuesday and Friday afternoons though would they? I shall look around for opportunities.

Thanks for posting x

Itsadogslife_2

I think charity shops and the like would be really pleased of the help, or if there was a community centre down there, you would be surprised what goes on in the day times - sometimes it is more focused towards the elderly, but personally this is an area that has opened my eyes as having lost my nan recently, I do worry that my grandad is not in the house festering on his own and I am constantly looking for things that he can join in with in the day.

Is there a hospital close by, they often have a volunteers section that help directing people or orderlys.

I am quite inspired by Secret Millionaire as I think it is an eye opener the types of charities that are around that are not even well know. When I have more time (and cash) I would like to do more to help people in some capacity.

I have to say, when my daughter was born, I loved her and she is my world, but I didn't have that instant "oh my goodness I love her so much". I felt miserable in the latter stages of pregnancy with bad hips, so very very tired, couldn't sleep etc. and I kind of felt I lost my identity slightly - nobody asked me anything about me, only whether I was ready for baby, etc. Then when she came along, I felt like a fish out of water. I remember changing the first pooey nappy and letting the feet go and they both retracted into the poop and I sat down and cried wondering what the hell I had thought having a baby (I think that was day 5 when the hormones are plummeting back to normal).

Looking back on it now, I think I may have had undiagnosed post natal depression - I often didn't get dressed in the morning and would find programmes that I had to routinely watch (I think Buffy the Vampire Slayer was on and I pretty much managed to watch it from start to finish) and I felt quite fretful about every small thing as I was sure she wasn't normal. I jumped at the chance to go out to a little part time work as they didn't see me "mum" and I felt like an individual again. When I went out to toddler groups etc, it was full of mums comparing children and I just wanted to talk about anything other than babies and children. Anyway, thats enough of my life on your diary, but I know exactly how you feel and I think it is completely normal. I moan about work all the time and would love a nice long holiday of maybe a month, but I would be bored stiff if I had to do it all the time

debtfreesomeday

Thanks for your post itsadogslife, you could've been writing about me to be honest. Ds is my world too, but I didn't have a huge 'rush' when I saw him, I thought he was lovely, but it didn't seem real, just like someone had given us their baby to look after. It wasn't really until day 3 when we were back in hospital and he was in the big incubator under lights for jaundice that it hit me. He looked so tiny and I had to re-apply his eye shield / blindfold thing after feeding every time which was just awful. Leaving him on the other side of the room in this big plastic box, screaming, whilst my bed was the other side of the room was just heartbreaking.

In the early days I wondered if I had PND too, but I think it was just the stress of Ds's medical problems and other family problems that made it very difficult to cope. Things are easier now, but we do have good and bad days and I have to remind myself things will get better and, most importantly, we have out wonderful little boy who we wouldn't be without.

Sorry to hear about the loss of your nan, too. I know what you mean about secret millionaire, we're fans too. In fact, it's on now.

debtfreesomeday

Another roller coaster weekend. Saturday was just awful; Ds was really not good: tired, irritable and suffering with teething, his ear infection and chronic constipation. Poor little thing was not happy at all. Everything just came to a head really and I got really upset about it all. The lack of sleep didn't help the situation much either. Needless to say the day was a dismal one.
Today was so much better, we did some washing and housework this morning, getting two loads of washing out on the line - not bad for the end of November! We then went out for the afternoon to a local park estate and spent a few hours walking, looking at the historic buildings and watching the deer that roam the park. It was such lovely weather too. Fresh air and sunshine is good for the soul!

It's been a low spend weekend too. Hubby paid for the £3.70 parking today and hot chocolate/latte in the little cafe and a hot drink and cake in a local coffee shop later in the afternoon.
About £10 has come out of the leftover money on a replacement cover for hubby's phone which broke, and a book to finish another Christmas gift. Just one more to get now.

The car needed petrol, which cost just under £50. We also picked up some shopping, mostly fresh produce and ingredients for recipes we made this weekend, as well as ingredients for meals for Ds. Altogether that came to about £35 out of our £200 budget. We are returning 3 items of fresh produce to aldi tomorrow though for a refund, as it was mouldy when we got home. That's about £3 going back on the card.

I've got some soup out of the freezer for lunch tomorrow, hubby's got some bolognaise. Jacket potatoes for tea tomorrow night.

Off to bed now. Night all.

Itsadogslife_2

Isn't it funny how it gets you like that, you can have an absolutely horrid day and the next day can be so lovely and serene.

I have found too that although Aldi's can be great for foods, the fresh produce doesn't have a great shelf life. I remember buying two danish pastries from there once which had a day or two left on the shelf life but it was furry :eek: I haven't bought any of the bakery items since

debtfreesomeday

Yes, it's a funny old World isn't it.

Hubby returned the mouldy produce to Aldi today for a refund. I need to work out the exact grocery spends tonight and post it in my signature to keep me motivated to keep within budget during the month (and so you can all kick my &rse if I overspend!).

I've transferred the leftover money to the 'everything else' online e-saver account today and then I'll transfer money back to the main account each time we have a spend from that fund as the money invariably gets spent on the debit card which is linked to the main account. I do the same with the grocery account and have a seperate e-saver for that, also as a 'spur' off of the main account. I probably haven't explained that very well, but it works for us.

One more spend from the 'everything else' fund last night was a book for £11.69 - a much needed, highly rated book on tackling baby sleep problems. We've tried the controlled crying technique and it hasn't worked for us, so we NEED some other ideas. Unfortunately our library, although very modern in design, seems to have an ancient back catalogue of books and they didn't stoock this one and weren't able to get it in. :mad: I looked for a cheaper, second hand version on amazon first too to no avail. Oh well, it's worth it if it works. PLEASE let it work!!!

The lady who bought our old printer is coming to pick it up tonight and pay the £15. I owe £4 to a lady at work as she picked me up some items from IKEA when she went at the weekend (saves me going and spending too much!), so that's £11 left which I shall pay off the credit card.

There is a chance that I may be able to knock another £200 off the credit card very soon, but I'm not sure if that's a definite so I'm not going to say too much yet in case I jinx it!

Itsadogslife_2

Well at least it is a win win situation with regard to the book. Firstly, hopefully the book will show you the light with regard to sleeping babies, and secondly once it has worked, you can relist it back on Amazon and probably get your money back straight away if there is a shortage.