Son showing signs of Dyspraxia

specsappeal

My now 18 year old son is dyspraxic and was diagnosed at 4 years old. He didn't speak until he was 5 and spent all his school age years in special school. He had it quite severely but has learnt to cope with it now he understands it a bit better. His confidence was awful and he had an emotional breakdown at age 10. He is not at all academic and prefers "hands on" activities. His co-ordination has improved alot over the last 4 years although when he is tired he is at his most "clumsy". His memory is still quite poor and his fine motor skills although better than they were are still lacking. However as an 18 year old young man he passed his driving test and has his own car, he has a long term girlfriend who also now lives with us and he is on a bricklaying course at college. He is loving, witty and has a great sense of humour. Even he laughs when he manages to fall over his own feet or trip up the stairs. The condition is becoming more widely known and this helps people to understand the condition better and make allowances. Either way I wouldn't change my boy for anything.:)

alyssa_liss

just to add to this even if you son is dyspraxic he can still have a normal life.

my fiance has dyspraxia (sp) i believe he was about 4 when they noticed (hes 24 now) he use to have to go to hospital to do little excersise . pushing people arms out catching balls etc..

he is very clumsy and is covered in cuts and little scars.

however he has a driving licence and a motorbike licence. he is vrey hands on . good at fixing cars and computers etc.

time keeping isnt his best lol

scruffy handwriting , i have to fill forms out for him.

he runs funny aswell btw. (its cute:D)


To be honest you forget he has it, as you just take him as thats how he is.

mumps

HV wanted to get my DD assessed for dyspraxia when she was 3. We decided not to go down that route, we paid for private swimming lessons, sent her to dancing classes and she struggled so we had a private lesson on a Friday night and then did class on Saturday, she couldn't have coped with class without the private lesson. She found primary school hell on earth, senior school was bearable, she loved sixth form and has blossomed at university. She is still scatty but clever and hard working.

The bullying bit is the worst, other kids can be vile. I always told her that life would get better, who cares if you can throw a ball or catch a ball once you are an adult? Who makes you go out in a cold playground at lunchtime and do things you hate that they think you should find fun.

We deliberately picked a senior school that other kids from her school weren't likely to go to so she had a fresh start, a couple of kids did go there but the Head was sympathetic and made sure she was in a different class. The fresh start did her good and a form tutor who liked her and supported her was a great help.

Good luck and I hope life gets better for your son, one thing my daughter said one day was that she doesn't regret any of the things that happened because she appreciates her life and her friends so much, her sporty popular brothers don't take things more for granted.

bestpud

My dd(10) has suspected dyspraxia and I eventually took her out of school because she was not considered 'bad' enough to assess. While they offered some help, they always had children with more significant issues and told me she would need to be at least 2 years behind before she'd get an assessment.

I was diagnosed with dyslexia a couple of years ago (while at uni) and the assessor was convinced I have dyspraxia too, but he wasn't qualified to formally diagnose it.

DD is always falling over, knocking things over and generally 'beating herself up'. Her legs look shocking as they're always covered in bruises! I can't take her in a china shop as the chances of leaving it intact are minimal! She made two cups of tea today and drank neither as they ended up on the floor! (We are both very clumsy!)

Riding a bike took her ages but she's ok(ish) now. We've gone from an accident every time, to one or two a week! (I still cannot ride one without endangering everyone around me, as well as myself!)

Her handwriting is poor, but she found a writing slope helped when she was at school. It may be worth asking them if your son can try one - they're not too expensive to buy if it helps.

DD has no imagination either and her drawings look like a 5 year olds. This is sad, as she loves art and gets very frustrated.

She finds jigsaws very difficult. Sewing is pretty much impossible for her.

She struggles terribly with team games, as she can't concentrate on watching the ball and the other players (same with me - the two of us playing catch is a sight to behold! :rotfl:)

Her attention span and short term memory are poor (as are mine).

Neither of us can dance for toffee either!

DD cannot distinguish between the sounds 'b' and 'd', although she can read them ok.

She also finds it difficult to eat with a knife and fork - it just doesn't work for her - it's like each hand has a mind of it's own! I just spill a lot of food!

I struggle to find the right word and will often talk with my hands. I do everything with pictures in my mind, but dd doesn't seem able to visualise things at all.

That's just a few things, but we have joined our local Dyspraxia Foundation group and that has been great! They have activity sessions where they can practice team skills without all the other kids moaning at them for missing the ball, or whatever. We can also borrow games and books. It's very useful getting tips from other parents too.

DD has started indoor climbing recently and is actually quite good at that, so we go when we can. I think it will help if you can find something your son is good at.

We use pictures and white boards to help us stay organised. I use my phone calendar and set reminders, but I still turn up to places late or on the wrong day!

I would push for a diagnosis, personally. Just thinking of my school years, it would have been sooo much easier if my problems had been recognised. I'm sure I'd have gone onto FE if I hadn't left school thinking I was a thick and lazy!!

I couldn't let dd go through the same so took her out of the education system. I hope you get a better result! I do think you have to be prepared to speak up, again and again!

Sorry, that was long!

Bennifred

bestpud wrote: »

................................I was diagnosed with dyslexia a couple of years ago (while at uni) and the assessor was convinced I have dyspraxia too, but he wasn't qualified to formally diagnose it........................

DS3 was diagnosed as dyslexic when he was 7. His (state) primary school could offer no real help, so we removed him and sent him to a specialist school for dyslexic children, where we learnt that he was also dyspraxic (with all the attendant disorganisation, lack of co-ordination, poor fine motor skills, etc) - apparently it is very common for the two problems to co-exist in varying degrees. He also learned that he wasn't thick, or that unusual - that there are lots of others with similar difficulties, and that it is better to accept that the fact he has to work harder than so-called "normal" children if he wants to achieve what may come easily to them.
After 2 years of specialist help, learning lots of different strategies to cope with organisation, etc, DS3 returned to mainstream state schooling, where on the whole he coped extremely well (it got easier as he moved up the school).
He is now in his first year at university studying History! :j

One of the most useful things for his academic work was him learning to touch type - his writing is illegible and all his work (including exams) is done by word processing. He used a digital recorder in class sometimes, because he couldn't take in the information and record it at the same time. We found that he had to "over-learn" everything so that facts etc moved from his poor short-term memory into his long-term memory.

lessonlearned

My DS2 is both dyslexic and dyspraxic.

I noticed things weren't quite right but school didn't pick it up. I paid for him to be tested myself when he was about 11 or so.

The tests proved positive with dyslexia being "borderline". I asked why school hadn't picked it up and was told it was because he had a very high IQ and was finding ways round the problem by himself.

I decided to accept the diagnosis and work with it but not let it "define" him IFYSWIM. I decided to just accept that he was quirky.

The problem is our education system doesn't take the same view and school was always a problem. State schools don't seem to know what to do with anyone who doesn't fit the norm. Unfortunately we couldnt afford an independent school.

DS2 was always a square peg that they tried to fit into a round hole. A rugged individualist, dreamy, obviously intelligent but hopelessly disorganised. Sport was an absolute no-no because of poor co-ordination skills.

Luckily he wasn't bullied. At least not by other pupils - although he had a couple of extremely unsympathetic teachers.

One in particular who accused him of being a baby (he was aged four and half at the time!!!!) because he wore shoes with velcro fasteners. (He couldn't tie shoe laces till he was 8). Needless to say she got the sharp edge of my tongue.

Just be there for your child and accept that organisation and short term memory are going to be problem areas and work round it.

I learned not to issue a string of instructions - just one thing at a time, double checked his school bag for school letters etc, kept a copy of his timetable to make sure he always had the right books, PE kit etc

One thing that did help him was music - he learnt to play the guitar which made him "cool" at school. He also had an elder brother who was a couple of years ahead, which also helped. DS1 did keep an unofficial eye on his baby bro. Bless him - he still does.

He went on to uni, got a good degree and has a job, so take heart dyslexia and dyspraxia aren't the end of the world.

One thing I used to do was point out to DS2 just how many high achievers are/have suffered this way and that he was in good company. Richard Branson, Leonardo Da Vinci, Einstein to name a few.