What time is reasonable for a 15yr old to be home in the evening

Spendless

Well, where is he going? If it's to hang around the chippy for most of the night when it's currently dark before 5pm then 8.30pm is more than reasonable. If he's going to a youth club that has a 9pm finish and he has to leave before the end then I think it could be extended- as long as he isn't going to come home and say I've got to do this homework that's due in tomorrow now.

nattyt

Me and my bro had to be at 8.30 weekdays and 9.30 weekends. Our parents would go to bed and out we'd sneak! Both of us had flat roofs outside our rooms and used to climb out the window. We used to meet up by the shed and off we'd go. NEVER got caught- god knows how! So for that fact my 15 year old normally in 9 in the week but tbh she very rarely goes out in the week as this a very important year and most of her friends live in different villages. At weekends she has to be in by 12 if its a party but if no special occasion and there is the potential that shes hanging round the streets then 10/10.30. Most of the time she is before this anyway. She has to do homework/revision as well before she is allowed anywhere! I am probably more lenient than I should be but she is sensible and on the whole I trust her.

loracan1

Mine's only just walked in (been at cadets). I'm letting him stay up a bit longer to chill out...but he did bribe me with half a toffee crisp. I'd expect him in for 10 otherwise (not every night by any means), but I'd not be draconian about it. He's a good kid, does as little homework as he can get away with, but gets decent grades.

I'm all for letting them have more leeway as they get older and 15 is near adulthood.

lindseykim13

Mine used to be around 10pm weekdays and midnight at the weekend when i was 15/16 but my mum trusted me to be reasonable about it so she never really told me off for being a tad late as other nights i would come home early if there was nothing to do.
If i was at a friends i would phone to say where i was when it was getting late and get an extention on occasion-watching a film etc

I would say you at least need a phone call by 9.30 so he can tell you where he is and if he's allowed any longer depending on where it is

Lozzy88

nattyt wrote: »

She has to do homework/revision as well before she is allowed anywhere!

I agree with this my coursework/homework was always done either in breaktimes/lunchtimes free periods, or if there was no way of finishing it in school i would bring it home at do it before i left the house, my parents never had to remind me to do it, i just wanted it out of the way as soon as possible lol

rev229

Spendless wrote: »

Well, where is he going? If it's to hang around the chippy for most of the night when it's currently dark before 5pm then 8.30pm is more than reasonable. If he's going to a youth club that has a 9pm finish and he has to leave before the end then I think it could be extended- as long as he isn't going to come home and say I've got to do this homework that's due in tomorrow now.

that just it he is hanging around most of the time, not so much if at problem if at someones house. Never does any homework, does it at school. Grades below average,very difficult child ASD! Being out later will give him more opportunities to find trouble. 9pm i can agree too and later if doing something but not beyond 10pm. At the moment he is not here for supper so he will need to return for that before we agree to a later time!! Kids!!!!!

Lunar_Eclipse

zcrat41 wrote: »

Curfew?! My mum would have laughed at that. School nights are for homework and school activities or organised sports. Not socialising.

But then I lived on a farm where there were no neighbours!

Same here!

I think it depends more on what he's doing than time curfews. Popping in to friends after Cadets for tea, toast & chat (for example) is completely different to going out doing nothing. One I'd allow and not be too strict about when he's home, the other would be restricted to Fridays & Saturdays only, if at all.

Presumably he has at least 2 hours homework a night. If he does sport, music or other organised activities, that really doesn't leave much time for hanging out during the week, does it?

Desperado99

zcrat41 wrote: »

Curfew?! My mum would have laughed at that. School nights are for homework and school activities or organised sports. Not socialising.

This was my teenage life! I only went out for band practise or Girls' Brigade (I certainly knew how to live!) and would get back by ten after safely seeing the younger kids home.

Having said that, I had an afterschool/weekend job so I didn't have too much spare time anyway.

I think 9 is acceptable, unless there is an activity that finishes later so you need to make it later to allow for getting home afterwards.

podperson

I think it does depend a lot - when I was 15/16 I would rarely go out during the week (if I did I think it was around 9pm for getting back) I had to do my homework and keep my grades up. I also worked a part time job on Saturdays. But as long as all that was ok then my mum and dad would let me go out on Friday nights (and very occasionally Saturdays if there was a band on or something) and come back about 12-1am. I was very well aware that if anything else suffered because of this then I would be in big trouble.
Could you work out any kind of compromise with your son along those lines - if he does his homework, keeps his room tidy, eats with the family etc then he can stay out a bit longer.

2sides2everystory

Your last post said ASD, rev229 ?