Best way to ask for honeymoon money?

74jax

wanchai wrote: »

You received a request for cash as an EVENING guest????????????????????

*goes for a little lie down*

I know, I thought I read it wrong....

lovecake

I think as long as people know how much you appreciate their gift/cash then that is the main thing. Keep a list of who has given what and make sure they get a personal thank you note. Someone else mentioned that they included photos of what they did on their honeymoon so people could see what their money went towards - I love that idea!

I went to a friend's wedding last year - I was originally invited as an evening guest, then they had family pull out at short notice so they asked if me and my friend would like to go to the meal too (not the ceremony, just the meal). I thought that it was nice that we were 'first reserve' to fill seats at the meal and we felt that we should give them something of a decent value (especially seen as I know how expensive it is to feed everyone at a wedding!)

They didn't have any mention of gifts on the invitation so my friend and I clubbed together and got them dollars for their honeymoon. We had just graduated from uni and were absolutely broke, but we felt it was the right thing to do. We didn't recieve a thank you at all - not a card, not in person any of the times we've seen them since, on facebook, text, nothing! I think it's so ungrateful!

Sorry for the rambling...the point was no matter what you choose, the main thing is that you thank everyone properly

74jax

lovecake wrote: »

We had just graduated from uni and were absolutely broke, but we felt it was the right thing to do. We didn't recieve a thank you at all - not a card, not in person any of the times we've seen them since, on facebook, text, nothing! I think it's so ungrateful!
)

:eek:OMG!!!!!!!!!

I would have called or emailed or text, anything! and said 'I want to make sure you got the card/envelope etc as there was money in it and we haven't heard from you'.

That is the height of ignorance.

MaggieBaking

74jax wrote: »

:eek:OMG!!!!!!!!!

I would have called or emailed or text, anything! and said 'I want to make sure you got the card/envelope etc as there was money in it and we haven't heard from you'.

That is the height of ignorance.

For me, that is a a good thing about thank you cards. We attended a family wedding, gave £80 in cash in a card. If they'd have written a thank you card and didn't mention it then I would have been able to enquire whether they received our gift.

When you don't hear anything afterwards, you can only assume that they don't care to say thank you for your attendance, or the gift.

minerva_windsong

I've never been asked to give money - or indeed anything - as an evening guest, but I have then gone back to the couple and asked if there's anything they'd like. One couple asked for cash and the other asked for Thomas Cook vouchers, and I was happy to give them something - I know it doesn't cost as much to the couple for an evening guest as a day guest but they've still had to pay for extra food, longer room hire, entertainment etc as they could choose not to have a night-time do, and the least I can do is give them something to say "thank you for inviting us and congratulations".

wanchai_2

MaggieBaking wrote: »

I have been asked as well. I was pretty unimpressed and we bought them a personalised present instead.

Good for you. I probably would have declined the invitation! The cheek! :eek:

lovecake wrote: »

I think as long as people know how much you appreciate their gift/cash then that is the main thing. Keep a list of who has given what and make sure they get a personal thank you note. Someone else mentioned that they included photos of what they did on their honeymoon so people could see what their money went towards - I love that idea!

I went to a friend's wedding last year - I was originally invited as an evening guest, then they had family pull out at short notice so they asked if me and my friend would like to go to the meal too (not the ceremony, just the meal). I thought that it was nice that we were 'first reserve' to fill seats at the meal and we felt that we should give them something of a decent value (especially seen as I know how expensive it is to feed everyone at a wedding!)

They didn't have any mention of gifts on the invitation so my friend and I clubbed together and got them dollars for their honeymoon. We had just graduated from uni and were absolutely broke, but we felt it was the right thing to do. We didn't recieve a thank you at all - not a card, not in person any of the times we've seen them since, on facebook, text, nothing! I think it's so ungrateful!

Sorry for the rambling...the point was no matter what you choose, the main thing is that you thank everyone properly

OMG, that is truly appalling! :eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek: I can't believe that people wouldn't say thanks for a gift, tut. I have written and thanked everyone who has bought us an engagement gift and will definitely do the same post-wedding!!!

minerva_windsong wrote: »

I've never been asked to give money - or indeed anything - as an evening guest, but I have then gone back to the couple and asked if there's anything they'd like. One couple asked for cash and the other asked for Thomas Cook vouchers, and I was happy to give them something - I know it doesn't cost as much to the couple for an evening guest as a day guest but they've still had to pay for extra food, longer room hire, entertainment etc as they could choose not to have a night-time do, and the least I can do is give them something to say "thank you for inviting us and congratulations".

I do give a gift if invited to an evening do, but it is very much a small, token gift. I'm against asking for cash in the invitation even for day guests; for evening guests it's pushing the boundaries way too far!!!

p.s. never been to a wedding that ended after the meal; so it's a bit disingenuous to say that evening guests cost the B&G more. Unless they have evening food served (which they should). They are having the room, band etc anyway!

jtr2803

wanchai wrote: »

You received a request for cash as an EVENING guest????????????????????

*goes for a little lie down*

I got one better than that......

We have had two evening invites asking us for money......we are still waiting for a thank you from one couple over 14 months late :mad:

wanchai_2

jtr2803 wrote: »

I got one better than that......

We have had two evening invites asking us for money......we are still waiting for a thank you from one couple over 14 months late :mad:

Disgraceful!!!!! I actually can't believe that people could be so rude