New neighbours moving in next door - my nerves are beginning to shred.

dontone

Well it looks like we have new neighbours moving in.
The problem is, is that we think that they are relatives of one of the last people who lived there and I'm currently feeling rather on edge, because although it isn't fair to tar them with the same brush, I don't want a repeat of last time.
What happened was that a few years ago a young couple moved in who thought that it was fun to slam every door, throw ciggy ends and other rubbish in our garden, and every Saturday night they would go out and come back at 4.30am every Sunday and proceed to scream at each other, boot the doors in and basically, just try and kill each other.
We did report them to the council about 2 months after they had moved in because he was beating her up, and you could actually hear him grunting in effort as he was kicking her, whilst she screamed the house down. I was that scared I phoned the police who arrested him (I watched them take him away and he was limping). The next day they were all lovey dovey.:eek:
Thankfully it all broke up earlier this year, and she left :j He's gone after an all night party in which one of his mates brought a dog who they kept tormenting, and I had to phone the police twice, as I was by myself 'cos DH was on nights and terrified because of all the noise and shouting going off.
Anyway the house has been empty for 6 months until this Tuesday, when someone decided to move in a fridge freezer at 11.30pm. Thing is I now can't relax on a night because, giving them the benefit of the doubt because moving stuff is noisy, I keep thinking that the same situation is going to happen again. I went to bed on Tuesday night shaking that much, my legs hurt from tensing up trying to stop.
I keep seeing the man who I think owns the property popping in at out and I'm wondering if I should ask who it is who is moving in. Failing that, any tips as to how can I relax? DH isn't as bothered by them as I am, but sometimes he isn't here. The door has just slammed and I'm feeling a bit edgy.
Anybody else ever felt like this. I know in a way I'm overeacting, and they might not be as bad. But I just have this sense of dread and can't get rid of it.

Sorry it's a bit long

Kay_Peel

Turn this frightening situation into something positive.

My son moved into his new house two weeks ago and an elderly gentlemen was twitching his curtains and looking apprehensive. Next thing was, he was on the doorstep with a parkin cake that he'd baked himself. What a sweetie! Of course he was invited in and over a cup of tea got all the information that he needed about my son and his lifestyle. He wanted a quiet life and was dubious about whether the new neighbour would be disturbing his peace with wild parties and DIY projects late at night. The visit reassured him.

I think I would do the same - turn up with a gift of food and a warm welcome - and set off on the best possible foot to start with.

Good luck!

adamantine

sounds like you had a very traumatic experience hearing and seeing what you did. i would maybe think about speaking to your GP re some counselling.

what makes you think that the new people are any relation to one of the last tennants?

MarilynMonroe_2

Hopefully they'll be nothing like the previous lot - just becasue they may be related really doesnt mean they will be trouble neccessarilly.
fIngers crossed aye? xxx

meritaten

hun - these last people were horrible - I dont blame you for being scared. BUT, the new neighbours may be really nice. give them a chance. Take over a cake and introduce yourself.
Dont linger or ask too many questions (you dont want to be pegged as the neighbourhood busybody).
Then please try NOT to interpret every noise as being like before!
Remember - YOU werent harmed before were you?

Weird_Nev

SOunds like you're projecting your (well founded) fears from the last occupants onto the blank canvas of your new neighbours.

GIve them some time to settle in and then invite them over for drink (xmas?) or something. Bring them into the community.

And give them a break for moving in late at night. If they're working etc then moving is a nightmare. They might have to pull a few late shifts to get their life on track.

lollipopsarah

When they do move in, you could just happen to be going out and say hello.
Just a quick one, with a welcome smile, if they seem nice, you could ask them if the leccy is on yet and and would they like a cup of tea, if not then just walk round the block and see how it goes.
Good luck and wishes.
xx

Slinky

Surely if the landlord has any sense and his house has been trashed by the previous tenants, he's not going to be inviting more of the same from the rellies.

Fingers crossed you get some more 'normal' people this time round.

coffeebeen

I completely understand what you're going through as we had very similar neighbours to you for 6 months a year or so ago. Booming (shaking our walls 2 flats down!) music, physical fighting and violence in the hallway (I called the police), screaming and shouting ALL night long until 6am sometimes. So, when they left I was overjoyed!

Then we had some new neighbours move and I was on edge for EVERY little noise. I couldn't relax as I was waiting for loud music to start or for an argument right outside our door again. But all this did was stress me out and made me miserable in my own home. Nothing happened. (fingers crossed ) I would really recommend trying to relax if you can probably nothing will happen at all. Can you go to the doctors or do something to try and calm your anxieties?

Problem neighbours make your life so miserable, even after they have gone!

j.e.j.

dontone wrote: »

a few years ago a young couple moved in who thought that it was fun to slam every door, throw ciggy ends and other rubbish in our garden, and every Saturday night they would go out and come back at 4.30am every Sunday and proceed to scream at each other, boot the doors in and basically, just try and kill each other.
We did report them to the council about 2 months after they had moved in because he was beating her up, and you could actually hear him grunting in effort as he was kicking her, whilst she screamed the house down. I was that scared I phoned the police who arrested him (I watched them take him away and he was limping). The next day they were all lovey dovey.:eek:
Thankfully it all broke up earlier this year, and she left :j He's gone after an all night party in which one of his mates brought a dog who they kept tormenting, and I had to phone the police twice, as I was by myself 'cos DH was on nights and terrified because of all the noise and shouting going off.

Oh, they sound delightful :eek:
Is the person who owns the house approachable? Could you have a friendly informal chat with him/her? I know sometimes landlords don't much care what goes on as long as they get their rent money (!) but it might be worth a try.

dontone

Thanks everybody.

I actually feel a bit calmer writing it all down. I know that it isn't fair to assume the worst straightaway, but it's just that apprehensive feeling that is hard to shake off. These moving in may be lovely, *fingers crossed* I hoping that they are a lot more considerate and mature.
I think the house is owned by mummy and daddy (he's been turning up quite a bit to tidy up) trouble is he never bothered to visit while those two lived there, so it may be a case of perfect angels at home and the away from it the halo falls off.
Certainly in the lad's case, because I thought he had killed her when he beat her up. That bloodcurling screaming and then a deathly silence will haunt me for a long time. Of course she was just as bad with the drunken mouthing off, so in a way they were well suited.
I think as long as laddo doesn't turn up making a nusiance of himself, everything hopefully will be ok. He is one of these who thinks that he can say/do what he likes, as long as he is in the house or in his car. Last time DH had a word, I had to make him promise not to hit him - it was hard for him not to though, DH had had enough, and he is so placid, it really does take a lot to wind him up.
Time will tell, but we are certainly not putting up with that kind of carp this time if anything of the sort happens.
We shall see.