Do bridesmaids keep their dresses?

Jewelleryfan

Hi everyone

I've been speaking to my 2 adult bridesmaids about what styles they like and trying to involve them in the dresses, I don't want them to think I'm making them wear something they won't like and I want them to be happy with what they wear so I've been asking them for their ideas. I'm planning on buying them from the high street for about £50 each and then also paying for their shoes and jewellery. We plan to pay for everything for the bridal party such as clothes, hair and makeup as I don't feel like I could ask them to pay for it themselves, especially as we are asking them to be part of our day.

I have no idea if I keep the dresses after to sell like I have seen on eBay etc or do I give the dresses etc to the girls as a present? Is it an individual thing or do you think they would expect to keep everything?
I guys are hiring all their outfits so they dont have this problem

Thanks!:)

Mrs_Moore_To_Be

We paid for our BM dresses for them.

They kept them.

Although it would have been nice to be able to sell them on!! But if you want to do that I think you need to tell them your plan at the outset.

wanchai_2

My BM will be allowed to keep her dress, I will also try my best to get something that she likes.

I'll probably buy her a necklace to wear on the day as her gift.

She'll be wearing her own shoes as the dress will be long and I'd rather she wore shoes that she already owns and feels comfy in. Plus it saves ££s!

Jewelleryfan

That's a good idea I didn't think of that I think I prefer long dresses so if they can wear their own shoes that would be a bonus :rotfl:
I plan on giving them some sort of personalised jewellery from a site I love so that can double as their accessories and present

Mrs_Moore_To_Be

I bought mine all a necklace each to wear on the day - they all matched. It was also their present.
They bought their own shoes, I asked that they be flat and poss silvery in colour, they all bought shoes they could wear again.
I paid for their hair. They paid for their make up if they wnated it done x

trying_2_b_good

It's personal choice - just make sure you let them know at the start if you expect to get them back at the end. That might depend on how many you have and whether or not they will sell on eBay anyway! I had 2 bridesmaids and dresses were under £50 in the sale. Doubt I'd get much for them on ebay, so they may as well keep them! I offered to get the shoes (dresses were short so you could see them) - but they chose to pay for them themselves.

tryingtobetheperfectHW

My budget is £50/60 a dress too, I've told my bridesmaids if they want them after, they pay half and keep them. If not I pay full then will sell them off after! They were all absolutely fine with that!

MaggieBaking

If I were a bridesmaid, I wouldn't object to someone selling the dress. I think if you bought it for £50 I would also ask for £20 or £25 if they would like to keep it (and less if they've damaged it somehow)

I'd check and see what you'd likely get for the shoes before I asked for them to sell on again, if only a few pounds I'd let them keep them. However I also agree with everyone else and let them wear their own, offering a donation if you want to choose a colour or if they're unlikely to own anything suitable. Jewellery I would definitely let them keep.

Kaye1

I would rather chew my own leg off than a) ask for the dress back or b) ask them to pay part to keep it. I asked them to share my day and they shouldn't have to incur any cost to do that. I only asked a few and knew I could afford to pay all costs involved. Why should they have to pay anything?

And honestly, truly totally honestly, I bet the majority of bridesmaids to say they don't mind contributing do mind really and are just being polite. My SIL was asked to be a bridesmaid and was asked to pay for the furry bolero that went over the dress- it cost over £100 and she genuinely didn't have the money; but was too embarrassed to say when all the other bridesmaids agreed to do so. The worry and anxiety that was caused because she didn't want to say anything to the bride was unbelievable.

floss2

I paid for my BM's Debenhams dress, she kept it. Apart from anything else, it won't fit me as we're different shapes & it was chosen to suit her, not me.

She bought her own shoes & clutch though, and wore her own wedding day pearls.

fawny

Hi,

I'm buying the dress for my BM, it will be from the high street she would be able to wear it again if she was going somewhere special. I won't be asking for it back, would not dream of it.