Really down and want to give up

Toto

Hi honey,

I really know how you are feeling right now, last year a group of my friends booked to go and see Cirque du Soleil at the Albert Hall and I really really wanted to go, but I couldn't. I was up to my neck in debt and there was no way I could justify spending money on a pure luxury night out. I was really miserable, dissapointed, had the January blues and was really sick of it all. I think that night stands out as being one of the hardest in my debt free journey.

The other one I remember was the day I came here crying because I had stood at a window watching my 9 year old daughter outside playing with her friends on a beautiful summers afternoon, the ice cream van came and all of her friends rushed inside to get money for an ice cream. My little girl just stood there, all of her friends came back and got their ice cream but she didn't even come to ask because she just knew we didn't have money for things like that. It broke my heart.

But, all of these things which seem so very tough are the things which give us the strength to get out of the debt trap and never look back. These are the things in time we hold onto and remember, I certainly have, that £1 ice cream is the reason I won't go back to debt again, your soggy sandwiches may be yours.

One day you will go to see Les Mis, but you will go when you can truly enjoy the experience, not when you would be spending half of the performance thinking about how much it has cost.

I am seeing Cirque du Soleil on Tuesday and it will be fantastic, because I have earned it and I can afford it (especially as it has come from ebaying [STRIKE]junk[/STRIKE] treasures and hasn't actually cost me a penny of my real money)

Why not print out a Les Mis logo and put it in your purse, a little goal to keep you focused during the starbucks run. These little things make a massive difference, but you already know that, you will be debt free before you know it and you will then be the one feeling sorry for the people around you stuck in their pre lightbulb spending trap.

xxx

lynzpower

I agree with Toto, as I always do !

its of course never easy on the first part of the cutbacks, no one finds it easy.

HOwever, Ive built up an arsenal of excuses
Im saving for a deposit on a house and I need 30k ( watch thier faces on that one)
holidays
losing weight

My OHs mum knows someone who imports sandwich fillings ( for supermarkets) from CHINA, so as a general rule I will never eat a pre-prepared sandwich or filling ( as london delis have those premixed in a tupperware fillings ) ever again. I just dont know when they were made, and that does bother me.

I make a lot of home made soups, my god, they are a million times better than the crap they serve up in most of the caffs/ prets/ strabucks et als Ive been to. And I know its clean hands that have made them. I do a mexican bean soup and my colleagueues salivate. Couscous, pasta & rice salads are also dirt cheap to make and are certainly no worse than the likes of what they sell in london for 4.50 for a lunch

tryhard_2

hi
to calculate how much you have paid off
(debt at LBM - debt at present)
5340-4650= 690
now divide that by debt at LBM and multiply by 100 to get it as a percentage
(690/5340)*100=12.92% its almost 13%!!!

LookingAhead

Toto your post brought tears to my eyes re: your little girl & the ice cream.
Oh God I think I'm gonna bawl!

deliciosa

Hi guys

sorry i wasnt around but i got into the hospital for a week and then jus felt so weak and hopeless, i justdidnt even switch on the computer...

i got into the hospital because i wasnt eating. still dont eat much ...

thank you again for your lovely words... things dont really get better and i still dont know what to do.


thanks Tumble for saying les mis is bad, it helps me to get over that failure...
i just feel that i wont be able to save enough ever... and i have no paydays till the tenth of this month.. i feel such a failure.

i cant see your names now so I just really want to thank everyone and i dotn want to leave out anyone, it means so much that you took the time to write...

but at least i managed to get something nice done - i work at m&s now and i ahve a credit card from them and they have employee rate of 9.9 percent so i switched to the employee rate and also transferred all money from my capital one to M&S card at 3.3% bt rate no fee, that was really good, i just did this yesterday...

my credit rating is very bad, i remembersomeone asking, i cant get new credit, but i am happy with the 3.3 percent and once i be able to i will move more debt on m&s card because of this. also i have taken out a season ticket loan from my company which is 0% so this way i just saved £150 a year (london zones one to two), wow....

i just tried eating oatcakes for lunch - boring and dissappoining. but i dotn want to be in hospital anymore because it was horrible... peopel didnt believe i did not have money for food but rather they thought i was anorexic which im not....

and im afraid to write down what i spend money on... sorry that i am being so negative but im not feelign well and i just want to write it out of me..

but someone commented on how nice my boss was, thats still true i now keep soya milk in his fridge and its really yummy coffee but i only had it twice because i was in hospital...

and thank you all for all food ideas. once i feel i can eat again i will do as you said. right now i just dont know... have to eat a bagette every day at least and other stuff too because the doctor prescribed... so boring and i hate spending money on it. i dont have a micro at work... thanks lookingahead, you always help.

toto i feel so sorry for you and your daughter, debt is a horrible thing and its just really awful... thank you for your encouraging words though.

just thank you all again ... i dont know what else to do but just thanks... oh and i spent on amex again and i hate myself for it.. please dont judge me...

thanks for listening.

Maddy

Emmzi

Lunch does seem to be a big issue for you. I'm going to suggest advertising on freecycle for a breadmaker. My colleagues are alqays jealous of my chunky sandwhiches with fresh made bread which costs pennies but they are too lazy to make!

lynzpower

Oh darling you do sound very low ( I know a spell at HM pleasure as I call the NHS can be a bit like that! depressingaint the word )

sorry i wasnt around but i got into the hospital for a week and then jus felt so weak and hopeless, i justdidnt even switch on the computer...
i got into the hospital because i wasnt eating. still dont eat much ...

now Im going to turn into my gran for a second here, hun you have to eat. Why werent you eating? didnt you have the money for it- or another reason?

i just feel that i wont be able to save enough ever... and i have no paydays till the tenth of this month.. i feel such a failure.

Feeling a failiure is NOT the same as being one. theres a fundamental difference. You need to realise its a state of mind. theres always someone worse off than you- which can help things into perspective.

i

cant see your names now so I just really want to thank everyone and i dotn want to leave out anyone, it means so much that you took the time to write...

you dont need to address everyone seperately hun. we all know what a hassle it can be, a press of thanks usually suffices

but at least i managed to get something nice done - i work at m&s now and i ahve a credit card from them and they have employee rate of 9.9 percent so i switched to the employee rate and also transferred all money from my capital one to M&S card at 3.3% bt rate no fee, that was really good, i just did this yesterday...

:T :T nice one

my credit rating is very bad, i remembersomeone asking, i cant get new credit, but i am happy with the 3.3 percent and once i be able to i will move more debt on m&s card because of this. also i have taken out a season ticket loan from my company which is 0% so this way i just saved £150 a year (london zones one to two), wow....

:T :T another result

i just tried eating oatcakes for lunch - boring and dissappoining. but i dotn want to be in hospital anymore because it was horrible... peopel didnt believe i did not have money for food but rather they thought i was anorexic which im not....

what HAVE you got in? Oatcakes are bird food. I can see why they dont appeal! If you lived local to me Id run you round one of my soups and a HM loaf

and im afraid to write down what i spend money on... sorry that i am being so negative but im not feelign well and i just want to write it out of me..

but someone commented on how nice my boss was, thats still true i now keep soya milk in his fridge and its really yummy coffee but i only had it twice because i was in hospital...

No biggie this is it, try to put things into perspective I bet wasted food used to happen loads before you found us here ( did with me) and I didnt used to care.

and thank you all for all food ideas. once i feel i can eat again i will do as you said. right now i just dont know... have to eat a bagette every day at least and other stuff too because the doctor prescribed... so boring and i hate spending money on it. i dont have a micro at work... thanks lookingahead, you always help.

its vitally important to eat right. If you dont you will be too weak & unable to think straight ( take it from someone who DID used to be anorexic) If I can be ANY help at all, do let me know ( im in E11)

just thank you all again ... i dont know what else to do but just thanks... oh and i spent on amex again and i hate myself for it.. please dont judge me...

What did you buy on the amex? Anything that can be taken back? If I were you sugar Id chop it up. theres nothing worse than the feeling of ohhhhh Ive spend on the CC again and outweighs what you had to buy.

Please let me know if I can be of more practical help

Lynz
x

Skint_Catt

I know it's not easy when you're ill to think about food, and it's not the cheapest way to live long term, but Sainsburys used to do microwave meals like macaroni cheese or veg lasagne for £1 each (own brand). I know Asda have had some 50p roast dinners recently.

At least try something like that to get your strength up.

S_C

deliciosa

Emmzi wrote:

Lunch does seem to be a big issue for you. I'm going to suggest advertising on freecycle for a breadmaker. My colleagues are alqays jealous of my chunky sandwhiches with fresh made bread which costs pennies but they are too lazy to make!

Thank you emmzi that's a good idea.. i a always hungry nowadays...what is freecycle, i never heard of it... ?

deliciosa

well firstly, WOWWWW congratulations on your debt free status! this has just happened, i see - well done, i am so jealous, but happy for you!

and thanks for your lovely words again...

the reason i wasnt eating was that i didnt want to spend money on it... not that i dont have because i do but i just wanted to pay off cards quicker and i just didnt eat.. and now my body got used to it and dont want to eat and whenever i eat with colleagues i chose the cheapest option and stress because thats usually not very nice food so i dont like what i eat....

i also eat fruits because a certaiin amount is free at work... they yummy.. but only one a day

i cant tell you how much i crave a soup and bread... i got a red bull from a friend ths morning thats what im drinking now, it actually just started to lift my mood... but i woudlnt want to eat it ecause i just dotn want to spend and anywya... but another good thing that on fridays i get free dinner :j not like a full one, but hot snacks, enough to fill me up.

i bought food on amex, cant bring that back.. and a dvd that i cant brng abck either and a plane ticket because i ahve to travel in april..

thanks again x x