The Ultimate Hard and Fast debt clearing mission

GreenSaints

I understand about the meddling MIL! Mine doesn't meddle, she's just mean!

shrimpy_80

Hello everyone, feeling a little delicate after Halloween party last night but it went brilliantly so I'm very happy. Now to be good in November!

I'm also in the 5ft 3 club, and I always feel tiny! I like being small though, everyone always thinks I'm shorter than I am so I must give off short vibes!

Hope everyone had a good weekend and that you managed to relax again Dinah.

GreenSaints

Hello everyone - Happy Monday

I hope feel better now Dinah and the meddling MIL has stopped, well, meddling

Something interesting happened that I needed to share, because I can't actually believe it myself. I'll set the scene - about half an hour ago, in the bathroom I was casually plucking my eyebrows (as casually as you can!) and my BF asked if if I wanted him to get some sweets for the trick or treaters

I said no because I hadn't budgeted for it (plus we never get anyone so we end up scoffing them ourselves.....maybe I should have said yes) So he said "So, can't we buy anything now?" I said "You can, but it'll push us over our £40 a week budget. I need the receipt so I can add it to the total"

Then he said this, so flippant "Well, I've been keeping a sending spreadsheet since January with how much I spend on everything. I keep all my receipts (side note: I wondered why he did that) and add them in" I'm already shocked at this point, but then he brings a Celebrations tin FULL of receipts!

He never tells me anything because he keeps it all to himself (one of the reasons we are at counselling) but seriously, !!!!!!?! This I did not expect. Even I'm not that organised!

Birdie85

Happy Monday Everyone! :wave:

Glad to hear you relaxed this weekend Dinah, good girl! Although boo to Mammy NIM ruining it; it was Halloween weekend so a witch was to be expected!

I've had a nce shoppy weekend, my Mum bought me these Ugg boots (in 'Toast') so I'm now in the Ugg crew They are so toasty warm I'm actually quite looking forward to it getting colder so I can be all smug and cosy! And I found some skinny jeans that actually look half decent on me, hurrah!

OH has been in touch over the weekend and he's OK despite being bandaged from shoulder to elbow, he had to go back to the hospital to get his dressings changed yesterday so I reckon that we'll be going to the hospital after I pick him up to get them changed again which is a happy welcome home present for him! Poor lad, he's not been able to swim or do anything fun and he's a water baby so it would have been really hard on him. By all accounts the stewardess immediately tried to blame her mistake on everyone but herself and my brother overheard the crew saying to each other 'If you say *this* then I'll say *that* and you'll be covered'... don't think they're counting on OH having 23 witnesses who saw what actually happened, which was the stewardess overloading herself with boxes under one arm and a pot of hot coffee in the other hand so when she tripped she couldn't catch the pot! I've been worried about him all weekend so it'll be nice to have him home so I know he's OK, or look after him if he's not! And my Mum was worried about my Dad getting into trouble!

Sounds like your OH is on the bandwagon if he's keeping receipts and logging his spends Greenie, seems a bit odd that he's not mentioned for 10 months that he's been doing it though! Maybe he's just been brought up to not discuss money so feels like anything to do with finances, good and bad, should be kept to himself?

starnac

GreenSaints wrote: »

Then he said this, so flippant "Well, I've been keeping a sending spreadsheet since January with how much I spend on everything. I keep all my receipts (side note: I wondered why he did that) and add them in" I'm already shocked at this point, but then he brings a Celebrations tin FULL of receipts!

He never tells me anything because he keeps it all to himself (one of the reasons we are at counselling) but seriously, !!!!!!?! This I did not expect. Even I'm not that organised!

use this as the perfect conversation starter. ask him if he wants to go through the receipts with you and spend some time just the 2 of you (and the huge tin of receipts of course!!) talking about spending and money. he obviously feels ready to show you now as he has been hiding it since january. go for it i'd say

Cinny91

Was wondering how your OH was getting on, Birdie! I don't get how it really could be anyones fault but hers, you're never really forced to drop something. At least he has the backing of people who saw what happened, hope he gets better soon!

I agree with Birdie though, sometimes people just consider money things private no matter how long you've been with them. At least he's come out with it now, and he'll be easier work to get on board with things if he's already doing that.

Waiting on a Mr Repair Man to come save my car today. I got a big chip on the windscreen driving home from the duck ponds yesterday. If they can just fix the chip it'll only be £12, but if they have to replace it it'll be £60. I have the money saved for things like this, just a bloody bother it's still happened!

Those uggs are pretty though Birdie, mine got a battering walking Percy yesterday. Rained just as I got there so everything was nice and muddy, and Percy likes to eat puddles then dribble them on my feet. Like a true gent! I was talking to some other doggy people I bumped into about training classes and I'm now far too excited for when we finally get Ryder! OH told me off for looking at dog beds yesterday I'm not buying anything.

Lara44

Aww Birdie, I didn't realise your OH arm was so serious. Poor thing not being able to enjoy the pool or anything! It's so annoying that the stewardess tried to blame everything but herself. She should have been seriously apologising. I hope they are able to offer him some decent compensation as obviously he wasn't able to cut loose and enjoy the stag weekend as much as he was hoping.

Greenie - Starnac gives some good advice. Sometimes there is no 'right' or 'wrong' in opinions but two different views. The goal is to get to an open compromise, where both sides feel listened to and valued. If you just accept your OH's actions as normal then it gets you to a more open place and hopefully starts a more honest discussion about money between the two of you. If you take his behaviour as 'evidence' of further secretive behaviour on his part and allow it to upset you then it probably harms your relationship. I am not one to give advice really as OH and I had an uncomfortable discussion about money last week!

Long day's work for me today. Am a bit behind in one of my courses and a deadline for this afternoon too. And some DIY to do. Better get off MSE then! :rotfl:

Birdie85

Lara44 wrote: »

Aww Birdie, I didn't realise your OH arm was so serious. Poor thing not being able to enjoy the pool or anything! It's so annoying that the stewardess tried to blame everything but herself. She should have been seriously apologising. I hope they are able to offer him some decent compensation as obviously he wasn't able to cut loose and enjoy the stag weekend as much as he was hoping.

I hope he does get something out of them to make up for it; it's ruined the weekend and he'll be at risk of scarring- surely they ought to pay up big time if someone is scarred for life as a result of their employee's actions?! :eek: Poor lad has no luck bless him.

Hope the chip gets fixed for the £12 Cinny! Had to laugh at your OH telling you off for looking at doggy beds prematurely... I get told off for looking at cots!

I hope everyone who dressed up for Halloween is going to share photos! I feel like I missed out this year, will have to go extra mad next year to make up for it!

Tete_en_l'Air

Good morning!

Birdie85 wrote: »

Glad to hear you relaxed this weekend Dinah, good girl! Although boo to Mammy NIM ruining it; it was Halloween weekend so a witch was to be expected!

Sorry NIM but that made me laugh hehe! And those Uggs are actuall quite nice - they don't even look like Uggs Jaysus to the price though!!

tinkerbel wrote: »

tete i saw this and thought of you i think its a cute thing you could make as presents/for yourself or something my ears always get cold!

Argh, such a good idea! I've seen similar things for walkerswhere you need something to keep the wind off your ears but a hat is too warm because of the physical exertion. AND I can granny so it's something I can make easily!

Lara, love those pouffes - are they made with massive needles and wool? Do you have a link to a tutorial?

Did you go for the groupon deal in the end Greenie? SmartCat is right when she mentions about not being able to get an appointment for ages, I've heard that from a few people. But it'd be a good thing to have 'in the bank' even if you can't use it this time. Sounds as though OH is ready to open up a bit more about money and it's great news that he's been keeping track of spends for so long - at least he's not sticking his head in the sand.

Cinny isn't chip repair on your insurance? Or are you not fully comp? Fingers crossed for you!

Wendz Poppy looks so cute today on FB I second/third that it's lovely to get her a bauble. We still have one on our tree from 1982 that my godfather bought me

Anyone who isn't my friend on FB (and anyone who is!) can see my Halloween outfit here

Birdie85

Oh yes, I forgot to thank/curse Tink for linking to that website, I spent ages over the weekend having a look at everyone's work and wanting to make everything! That granny square headwarmer is so very Tete!

I was a bit :eek: at the price of the boots too Tete but Mum was in mega spendy mode and didn't care, she wants to buy me a Barbour jacket too, think she's worried about me getting cold this year! My last pair of Rocket Dog wannabe Uggs (which are ugly as hell TBH but were the warmest things I had so I held onto them...but they're nowhere near as warm as my new boots!) have lasted for 6 years so if these boots last that long (which they'd better!) it'll only work out as £42.50 a year which isn't too bad.

Love your Halloween costume, think you suit red yarn hair!