Dealing with school bullies and getting it nipped in the bud..

Carl31

Sammy85 wrote: »

I turned round and slapped him clean across the chops and noone ever said or did anything to me again.

i did that too, i wasnt being bullied as such, but my Mum had always taught me to stand up for myself 'If someone hits you, hit them back'

The kid was picking on every kid in my class, it got to my turn, i smacked him straight in the face, never once botherred me or my class again after that. Admittedly, that wouldnt happen in every situation and its not something id recommened.

Ive seen how people (good friends) that were bullied at school are now lacking confidence in adult life, and its had massive impact on their day to day life. Personally, I have vowed to never let this happen to my kids and if the situation every arises, the 'formal' channels will be used, if i dont get an immediate resoloution ill deal with things myself, i dont care if i get a slapped wrist in the process

FatVonD

I think you should approach the Police, the Education Authority, the Head Teacher and the School Governors, keep copies of everything and CC everyone in on everything so everybody is aware there is a problem and that everybody else KNOWS that they have been alerted to the fact that there's a problem and that they need to do something about it.

victory

Sammy85 wrote: »

In the end the ringleader said something to me whilst we were queuing outside a classroom one day when i was in year 9. I turned round and slapped him clean across the chops and noone ever said or did anything to me again.

MY OH was bullied terribly at school and his parents kept asking him to defend himsef and going to the school but nothing worked until OH lost his cool one morning and slapped him like you did and they never once bothered him again, from thatday on his school days changed and he was able to get on with his studies, perfect, maybe not the ideal solution or recommended but it worked.

charliemaine1bee

I've spoken to local police this morning,they are going to send someone out to see us sometime today and ive got an incident number for it.He advised me to contact the school first thing monday morning.

Apparently they will come and speak to us and then pay the lads family a visit.Hopefully it will nip things in the bud but if it doesn't then it will be followed up and not to worry i'm told.

Obviously i can understand the boy hasn't had the best start in life and can see the point of those that say he needs support himself..But my son has the right to be able to play out and go to school without the fear of being physically and verbally attacked on a daily basis.When it happened before he developed verbal and motor tics because of this lad..nightmares and coincidental or not heavy nosebleeds.he became a recluse..over the past year since hes been gone he's been a different lad..happy and confident and he loves school..the tics have gone also..do i want to go back to all that again..no way x

victory

Of course your son has every right to be play out, I hope you get it sorted and your son manages to 'forget' about it and have a much happier future:D

Bumpmakesfour

For what it's worth I think you did the right thing.Sure,as adults,we have to take into account the other lads terrible circumstances BUT not at the expense of your own childs happiness.Hugs and I hope it's sorted quickly for you x

DevilsAdvocate1

My oldest son was bullied when he was in year 7 (he's just gone into year 9). When we went into the school the staff took it seriously and they sorted it out. So it can be done. In fact DS is now good friends with a couple of the lads who were bullying him, though the ringleader ignores my son (but this is fine).

I suspect that the ringleader does not have a happy home life from a couple of things my son has said. For example, the ringleader is terrified of his parents. When he ripped his top at school he was hysterical and screaming that he couldn't go home.

D.

ALIBOBSY

It is awful that schools can still get these issues so wrong. The school DS goes to had a rep for this kind of problem about 8-9yrs ago. But things were changed by a great head (sadly had to retire from ill health)-now being carried on by a new head and dep head. They even got an award for the anti bullying policies.

From the day they start it is firmly laid down, no swearing at each other, no insulting, no fighting-respect each other and yourselves.
They have "houses" and housepoints leading to rewards for good behaviour (and if you don't get a min no of points you miss out on end of year trips etc. The younger kids have older mentors from the start-and school clubs etc encourage the age groups to mix and look out for each other this avoids older kids terrorising the younger ones. Teachers man the gates and the street as the kids arrive and go home to watch behaviour.

The slightest issue is caught straight away and a series of punishments are used for any miss behaviour.Parents are contacted about even low level issues-we get notified even for break time or lunchtime detention. Hitting of any kind is not tollerated in any way. Parents are called in and they use "isolation"-the child spends all day isolated-separated during lessons,alone with a staff member at any other times of the day.

It does take more work from the staff, but it is paying off-the schools reputation has shotup as have their results. Classrooms are quieter and it is a much nicer place to work (so the teachers say lol). So a school can do it if they are motivated enough.

Good luck to the op keep on to the head-ask for their antibullying policy keep complaining to all the authorities. this issue needs sorting for all the kids in the class-including the bully himself who needs some kind of support/help to push him away from this type of behaviour.

ali x