Best way to avoid over spending when out for a meal with family

rachbc

shellsuit wrote: »

I'm glad my friends aren't like you then!

Why was it a problem for him? Because he wanted to pay for what he had and not pay any more towards everyone elses share?

What's wrong with that?

I have no problem with splitting a bill, but if I was short/skint or didn't want to pay extra above what I'd eaten and drank, I'd want to pay for mine and mine alone and if my friends were any friends at all, they'd understand and not have a problem with it!

because who wants to spend 20 mins with a calculator going through the bill - and of course who was to say he's only had 2 of the 20 pints of beer on the bill, or only 1 popadom from the big pile, or exactly what proportion of the pickle tray, or how much of the shared family sized naan - he'd pay for his main meal but conveniently forget a contribution to all the shared stuff.

mrbrightside842

I had a friend who used to contribute after all the others put the tips in, so her bill would be cheaper. We'd all put a £2 tip in, but then when it came to counting it at the end we'd be bang on, and it was because she didn't agree with tipping. So by putting a ten pound tip in, we were really just paying a tenner towards her meal. Worked out to wait til the very end before tipping.

aloise

It is soooooo annoying when this happens. We recently went out with my son and DIL and her family. We had one course,and a glass of wine out of 4 bottles bought. yet we had to split the bill with the others evenly,even though most of them had 3 courses and extras (there were 3 teenagers there so you can imagine how much they ate. ) which made us pay over £20 more than we had actually consumed. To make matters worse, one member of the family didn't pay anything as he was "a bit short of money "even though he has a really good teaching job and we are pensioners. I could see by my son's face that he was shocked as he also had not had a lot and doesn't drink. We worked it out later that the FIL had got away with paying loads less less for him and his wife's meals, they had had the full 3 courses and drank a full bottle of wine between them.
I think Skylights idea is the best one. Wouldn't go to your dad, might be thought to be spoiling his day. Don't be marteris about it just straight forward and FIRM

building_with_lego

This bill- splitting talk has reminded me of a friend of my Dad's. They go out for a meal with my parents from time to time and he always works out who's had what and how much each couple owes.... and then works out how much his wife owes him for her meal, to the penny :rotfl:

19lottie82

If I was in your situation, I would much rather have a quiet word with my dad and explain that you won’t be going as I don’t have the cash at the moment, rather than put up with the embarrassment of getting my calculator out at the end of the night and working out how much everyone owes exactly.

Based on your post, it’s clear you can’t afford to go for the meal, so don’t. there’s no need to feel guilty.

Mrs_Arcanum

It is usually me shoving extra in at the end but then I also know I tend to quaff the wine so don't mind. Works do everyone pays for their meal up front (before we even get to the restaurant) then the boss kindly provides some wine (it is the extra I pay towards).

shellsuit

rachbc wrote: »

because who wants to spend 20 mins with a calculator going through the bill - and of course who was to say he's only had 2 of the 20 pints of beer on the bill, or only 1 popadom from the big pile, or exactly what proportion of the pickle tray, or how much of the shared family sized naan - he'd pay for his main meal but conveniently forget a contribution to all the shared stuff.

You didn't say he did that originally which makes the situaion totally different.

mummyroysof3

i dont agree with the splitting the bill idea...if we go out for a meal as 5 of us then we pay for our 5s meal and drinks...wouldnt expect anyone to pay for anything they hadnt had

OP i would just ask your mum whats happening about paying and go from there

burnoutbabe

I'd not go, sitting there whilst everyone else has starters mains and deserts, whilst just sharing some kids meals would just make everyone feel uncomfortable!

When i know i am out with mates who share the bill, i make sure i have roughly the same as them, ie same number of drinks and coirses, then you don't feel ripped off. if i can't afford it, i'd not go - or meet people later for drinks.

Bumpmakesfour

People saying not to go if you can't afford it etc....well surely the whole point is they CAN afford it if they for for what THEY eat.Where's the issue?Why stay in just because you don't have the cash to pay a share of someone elses food???
I'd be mortified and really upset if I found out that friends were worrying about going out or even considering not going just because of the bill paying at the end!