Bankruptcy advice again please

Maizy

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Ineedaname

I'm not able to answer all your queries, only you truly know if you are insolvent and only you can make that final decision to rid yourself of all the stress this is causing you.

You also state you would not starve for the sake of going BR, but it sounds like you are close to that anyway if you are struggling to clothe your kids and keep a car running.

The one thing that jumped out at me is that you have a DMP plus other unsecured debts plus family debts. Did you run up the other unsecured debts after entering into the DMP? Why have you not added them into the DMP to make all payments smaller? Can you make arrangements with the family members to reduce payments too?

Are you paying a DMP company to run it for you? If so then please contact one of the free debt advice agencies listed in the Look Here First thread. They will not charge you for running a DMP, saving you even more money.

Regarding going BR without any CC statements. Don't worry, I was on a DMP for 5 years before going BR so had very little to send to the OR. I just sent what statements I had (some of the DCAs were sending regular statements, otherwise I just sent the last CC statement I had on file) and the OR was fine with that. I was still asked what I spent the money on to build up my debt and of course that was a struggle to remember, but I knew it hadn't gone on a high lifestyle, just living a little beyond my means for 20 years. You end up putting the unexpected expenses on the card because your salary is going on repayments every month so there's nothing spare for savings/unexpected expenses.

Hope that helps a little anyway.

Maizy

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Ineedaname

Hi Maizy

Don't worry if you've asked questions before, we all understand the stress and worry so are happy to keep answering.

I guess in a way you've answered your own question - that really you are insolvent and are unable to keep going as you are, but you are worried about this family member who needs the money back.

How about this?

Invite them round or even meet on neutral ground. Explain just how bad things truly are and ask for their understanding at the very least, even if it changes nothing for the moment. At least then you will have lifted some of the weight off your shoulders and shared the problem.

Hopefully someone can comment on the family members issue for you as I feel this is the sticking point and also could be your breaking point.

Hang in there and the right decision will appear.

NeverAgain_2

Hi Maizy,

I was wondering how you were getting on.

As well, or as poorly, as could be expected by the sound of it.

The OR will write to all your creditors, although he is not psychic, so he will only write to the ones you tell him about.

You could 'forget' to put the family members on your list, but I'm not sure if that will help you a great deal.

Fiddling money in their direction will be even harder once your finances are under the control of the OR.

Repo tape on the house could be avoided if you sell it, but can you do that under a suspended repossession order?

As a general point, you still have some control at the moment, and all decisions - even horrible ones - are best made when you want to make them.

If you continue to muddle on, there may come a point when your creditors lose patience, and you could find yourself bankrupt when you least expect it.

Mind, every cloud has a silver lining, going bankrupt that way would at least save you the fees and some form filling.

Maizy

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hisandhers1978

Hi,

Your circumstances seem so similar to ours with the debt amount, your house situation and owing money to your family members.

We put it off for so long because of the pride and embarrassment thing and paid and struggled with a dmp for so long.

It's very unlikely they will put tape all over the front of your house ect.

If I was you I would not pay one more penny to anyone and use every penny of that for br fees and also for moving to a new rented house.

Please DM me if you have any questions what so ever and I will try to help and answer ther as reading about your situation is like reading ours and we went br in march and it literally feels like wevhave a new stress free life now compared to before.

Hope this helps.

Maizy

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hisandhers1978

When they took possesion of our house a small a4 piece of paper went up in the window that's all and was only up for a matter of days and all it has on it is the contact details of the company who are holding the keys and dealing with the sale

The way we saw the house situation was that it was going to take so many years to get into a situation where we had money in the house that with br we could clear every single penny of debt and start again with all our money been our own enabling us to save money a lot quicker then without living to the last penny every week.

We kind of live in a place where everyone knows everyone and we let it drag on so long worrying what people would think but in reality we went through it will little hassle and without anyone knowing. our only regret is continuing for so long giving back all that dead money what would have been written off.

In my opinion people think br is very different to what the reality actually is, yes it is terrifying, embarrassing, and confusing and that feeling of the unknown is awful. It is certainly a last resort but once it's done there is an overwhelming feeling of relief.

Regarding Owing family members money:

Its hard to explain this in writing but once you have agreed your SOA with the OR you are left alone and to do as you please. What I mean is although you aggree the amounts of the SOA for eg. £500 groceries, £50 haircuts, £100 clothes, etc etc etc the bottom line is you will have a total amount of money your allowed which let's say for eg it comes to £1250. Now if you want to go and spend £1000 per month on clothes and live on bread and rice for the rest of the month then that's up to you!

So my point is don't mention your family members during all this and when it's all over you will know what you can afford to pay them, it will just come off the amount you have left to live on...have u posted your SOA on here?

NeverAgain_2

Maizy,

I think how much the neighbours find out about your repossessed house depends on how curious and savvy they are.

Assuming you surrender the keys and the bailiffs don't have to break in, the only likely external sign will be a note in the window.

You will vanish and the house will be auctioned, which is a pointer to next door.

Repo tape may be put over some of the appliances and fixtures inside - the toilet, boiler and so on.

Neighbours will only see this if they view the auction particulars online or on paper.

The bathroom of this house is typical:

http://www.whitehotproperty.co.uk/07,0,0,0,1421335,36413,00.htm

Maizy

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