Outrageous update! Stressed FTB!

puddy

i sort of agree with the above, but, i also think that emotionally its easier to have a firm boundary in your own head so that you can cut clean from something if its not going to happen.

this situation is stressful so its better to know (say by lunchtime) that this property isnt going to happen and move on. if you dont set a timescale, then what? you wait, you dont know whether to look for other properties, you dont know what to do with the mortgage application etc etc

if by the deadline the offer hasnt been taken up, OP can move on to searching again, put the property out of their head and know its not for them

Doozergirl

puddy wrote: »

i sort of agree with the above, but, i also think that emotionally its easier to have a firm boundary in your own head so that you can cut clean from something if its not going to happen.

this situation is stressful so its better to know (say by lunchtime) that this property isnt going to happen and move on. if you dont set a timescale, then what? you wait, you dont know whether to look for other properties, you dont know what to do with the mortgage application etc etc

if by the deadline the offer hasnt been taken up, OP can move on to searching again, put the property out of their head and know its not for them

I understand where you're coming from, but how did you know it was never going to happen if you've given someone about 4 working hours to decide?

What you do in the meantime is keep looking, of course. If you find something else, all's good.

Hedge your bets. If you want a house at the best possible price then it will take time because you need that time to make the vendors think and reconsider.

Corporate sales in particular can take weeks just to find the right person with the authority to adjust the bottom line. If you want a straight 'no' you can have it, but if you want to really push on them it takes time. My rule is that if the answer is too fast with a corporate, they haven't found the right person to authorise a lower price.

DVardysShadow

puddy wrote: »

i sort of agree with the above, but, i also think that emotionally its easier to have a firm boundary in your own head so that you can cut clean from something if its not going to happen.

this situation is stressful so its better to know (say by lunchtime) that this property isnt going to happen and move on. if you dont set a timescale, then what? you wait, you dont know whether to look for other properties, you dont know what to do with the mortgage application etc etc

if by the deadline the offer hasnt been taken up, OP can move on to searching again, put the property out of their head and know its not for them

I understand what you are saying and agree with the idea of a boundary. But, taking on board what Doozer says, that mental boundary is surely a walkaway price, which if you are pressed for £1 more, you leave it. An artificial deadline, delivered in bad grace, is not a good boundary IMO

I would say that OP would have done better - if it had to be this house - to have just left the best offer on the table and carried on looking. There may be a place for threats of dropping an offer, but this is when you clearly have an idea of what else you are able to consider. Not the OP's position.

san09

EA rang this afternoon and said the vendor is adamant they want £144k, and hubby just said ''Thanks for that, bye.''
Guess that's the end of that then!

Ulfar

Move on, you will find somewhere else.

If they come back to you, I would not offer anything more than your original offer.

san09

Couldn't offer more even if we wanted to. Feel like this has been a lesson learnt tho'.
Now I'm sorry we didn't just make one offer of £135k and walk away. That was the price we felt was right. The whole negotiation thing was a disaster for us, and all one sided. We did everything wrong.
We'll never be that gullible again tho'.
If anyone wants any tips on 'how not to buy a house', or 'how to lose the house of your dreams' please contact me cos I'm an expert!

Doozergirl

I think your H's ego is getting in the way.

When someone rejects a final offer then the answer goes something like 'well, we are here if they change their mind. Is it okay if I call in a couple/few weeks if they haven't sold, then perhaps we could see if they will reconsider?'

The EA will be on your side as much as you can convince them you're a commited buyer. Throwing around threats, curt replies and putting the phone down doesn't help. What if they have the next house you want?

Your H sounds like a loose cannon.

san09

I think he's feeling 'messed around' at the moment.
It feels like we've done everything expected of us and then they want more.
When we first enquired about this house the EA told us the vender wanted mid to late £130's.
We have obviously come across as too keen and needy.
They were more surprised than we were that our final offer was rejected as they led us to believe it was a 'done deal' at that price. They know we are commited, and we've been pretty much led by their advice, which is why they're so apologetic. They said they've tried to reason with the vender as they're being unrealistic but to no avail.
Hubby wants nothing more to do with it, but I cant say the same.

neverdespairgirl

san09 wrote: »

They told us the price they wanted and have now reneged on the verbal agreement!:mad:

When it comes to buying and selling land, a verbal agreement is worth the paper it's written on.

No point getting too stressed, sorry to say. Try looking at other houses.

Running_Horse

They wanted a certain amount. You were not willing to pay it.

Not quite sure I would describe that as outrageous.