Time for change....loobey's ramblings

Igamogam

Hello again! And welcome back to the bandwagon - dont worry most of us have done it Get that SOA updated,brush yourself down and begin again. You can do it with the support on here - have a look at some of the other diaries and money saving/making threads. My only query would be is a DMP the right thing for you? If you havent done it already then shift those cards onto to 0% if you can then cut them all up - new and old:) I will pop by now and then. Good luck!

Hovel_lady

Hello Loopeyloop and welcome back

Glad your head is back out of the sand
You're not an idiot - we're all done it.

Will be [STRIKE]keeping an eye on you [/STRIKE] dropping in to offer encouragement and cheer you on :T

saterkey

Hi have just read your thread, so sorry things havent improved for you in the last 5 months or so.

a few things that stood out from your last soa, was the third car, maybe reduce to 2??

check and make sure your getting all the benefits your entitled to? See if you can temp during the holidays to get you out of the house and away from food etc.

Mobile phone............................ 40
maybe change contract to pay as you go

Satellite/Cable TV...................... 25
get freeview maybe

Groceries etc. ......................... 370
reduce, make a game of getting the best bargains, whoopsies, really meal plan

Clothing................................ 34
dont buy anything for awhile

Petrol/diesel........................... 170
Road tax................................ 60
Car Insurance........................... 88
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 24
Car parking............................. 2
maybe these will reduce if your down to 2 cars

Other child related expenses............ 30
not sure what these are

Other insurance......................... 25
can this go?

Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 10
Haircuts................................ 5
Entertainment........................... 20
cut right down on these see what you can find for free, if you volunteer it might provide the social activities you need, nights out etc

can your family lend you any money till you get on your feet. would you let out a room? do competitions? surveys and the like, some market research is good, i once got 40quid for just chatting about a product for half hour in a group.

Re weight look into your local doctors nhs services, i managed to get some free tokens to join weightwatchers/slimming world from the weight management services, they gave me about 12 weeks free and if i met my target i would get some more. Worth a look to see what your area offers if anything. They also offered some free daytime classes to do.

Realise your not in a good place right now, wish i could make it better for you. so sending you a big virtual hug and a mug of tea with chock.

Loobeyloop

Hello, thank you so much for your lovely kind words, I really wasn't expecting anyone to comment, you are so lovely!
Hello again Hovel, hope things are better with you since I was last here x
CandyCC, I am determined to stick to it this time....good luck with your journey too
Igamogam, the only reason I'm thinking about a DMP is because I can't get anymore 0% unfortunately, and all my CCs are have interest, and can't afford to pay more than the minimum, but good idea,will have a read of the other diaries for some inspiration thank you
saterkey, thank you for looking at my last soa, it is a joint one with my bf, and we do have very separate finances, he pays the mortgage, sky and CT and I generally pay everything else, we probably have similar amounts of debts the 3rd car is his, I think he is considering selling it, but we'll see, you know what boys are like with their toys!
My main problem is that when I go shopping I pay with my debit card, and am a bit too frivolous, quite often don't even look at the total bill, just punch in my pin number whilst joking with the cashier....this has got to stop, I'm going to only allow myself a set budget and only have cash when shopping, think this might help curb my overspending, plus I have a freezer full of bits and bobs....told you I have a problem lol!
Thank you all so much again, your kind words are sooooo comforting, I am going to have a good read of your diaries...hope things are going good for you all.....
Hope you are having a lovely Friday eve xxxxx

Loobeyloop

Hi diary, and anyone who's reading....
thought it was about time I came back here, but this time actually do something about it, take responsibility and be serious about my debts.... I have done an updated soa below, this is based on July's spendings, which were a very expensive month, 1 because my darling cat is poorly, she hasn't long left on this planet, so am making sure she is as comfortable as can be whilst she's still here :(:( hence the big vet bill...also it was ds birthday, and although he was so understanding and didn't have a party I really wanted to buy him something, so got him a few bits on catalogue and gave him £20
my spending has gotten out of control more than usual which is why I felt the need to start writing on here again....have joined the grocery challenge and the nsd one, to hopefully whip me into shape...
this soa is only mine, although I live with my bf and we have a mortgage together we are very very separate with our finances, he pays the mortgage bar £3, the council tax, sky, insurances and mobile...bet if you are reading this you think jammy tart! I pay everything else involved in keeping house, pay for everything ds and cat related. I stupidly rejoined the gym and although I love going I know it's going to have to go when my year is up. Also fat club has to stay have lost 2 stone and just can't do it alone, have tried!

Anyway if you are still reading this or if it's just me here is my soa, any comments/advice/pov really appreciated.

Right I'm off to make bacon pasta for tea...oh and on the upside, it was a nsd again today!:j

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet

Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 1
Number of cars owned.................... 1

Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 672
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 328.55
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 1000.55

Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 3
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 0
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 0
Electricity............................. 30
Gas..................................... 39
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 28.8
Telephone (land line)................... 18.5
Mobile phone............................ 0
TV Licence.............................. 12.12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 307.95
Clothing................................ 28
Petrol/diesel........................... 99
Road tax................................ 21
Car Insurance........................... 31.33
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 0
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 15
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 96
Buildings insurance..................... 0
Contents insurance...................... 0
Life assurance ......................... 0
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 20
Haircuts................................ 50
Entertainment........................... 5
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
gym..................................... 19
fat club................................ 21.99
Total monthly expenses.................. 845.69


Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 0
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 2500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 2500


Secured & HP Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 0........(3)........0
Total secured & HP debts...... 0.........-.........-

Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
nationwide cc..................1446......45........16.9
santander cc...................3199.57...72........16.9
tesco..........................2376.91...47........16.9
next...........................100.......10........0
littlewoods catalogue..........70........18........0
barclaycard....................2569.6....80........16.9
halifax........................2774.12...48........16.9
Total unsecured debts..........12536.2...320.......-


Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,000.55
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 845.69
Available for debt repayments........... 154.86
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 320
Amount short for making debt repayments. -165.14

Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 2,500
Total HP & Secured debt................. -0
Total Unsecured debt.................... -12,536.2
Net Assets.............................. -10,036.2

Created using the SOA calculator at https://www.makesenseofcards.com.
Reproduced on Moneysavingexpert with permission, using other browser.

Loobeyloop

Wow, this forum is brilliant, I know I'm not new to here, but I have kind of lost my way, life likes to throw continual poop at us when we are already down, but it's how and what we do to survive that matters and makes us stronger. Reading others diaries, ideas and experiences is absolutely priceless. I've been dipping in and out for the last week or so after an absence of several months, don't know why, suppose to bury my head in the sand, yet again....

Well this is it, am going to be as frugal as can be, have a fairly well stocked freezer so will try not to buy anything other than essentials until it is bare...I know my family probably won't like it, I have spoilt them in the past with cooking quite elaborate and extravagant dishes, I love to cook, and feed everyone well, but needs must, beggers can't be choosers.
I am going to do 1 positive thing a day and one frugal thing which I will put on here to keep motivated. Will to try and be more positive and cheer meself up...I suppose we have to reach rock bottom before we can start to climb back up.
Onwards and upwards!
today I did a survey (have a £10 m&s gift card on the way)
frugally I cooked a lovely pasta dinner with store cupboard ingredients inc half a jar of mushrooms that were reduced from ald1 that I must have had for at least a year. will make a mushroom risotto with the other half....
gee don't I sound boring! I hope I find my sense of humour and learn to smile again on this journey....

night diary

Loobeyloop

Morning diary, and anyone who's kind enough to read my drivel! Have woken up this morning feeling really positive, I AM going to dig myself out of this debt hole. I think my first task is to get out of my overdraft, it's only £800 but when you don't even earn that amount, and there's no point in trying to pay cc's off with an overdraft is there?....so my idea is, to keep on the grocery challenge, keep focused, spend as little as is practically possible (not easy for a foodshopaholic with a poorly kitty!) and after payday (end of the month) get my od reduced maybe by upto £50, but to keep reducing it month by month so I can't keep friviously spending what isn't mine.

this morning I have done a survey and have £1.50 accumulating so far.
Today won't be a nsd as DS is going out with friends so needs £2 for train, but he is going to take a packed lunch. And unfortunately I have promised to meet up with friends for coffee so will buy the cheapest drink available.

I'm feeling quite relieved and a weight has been lifted, I'm going to take this debt by the horns, it's my mess, I've got to sort it out.

Laters :cool: x

Loobeyloop

Yet another night of broken sleep, am so tired. Have woken up feeling really stressed and low, it's going to be one of those days. Fed up with everything, want to run away from everyone/thing but where? Hate my self for getting in this mess, for being a fat lazy waste of space, my house it a disgusting mess, my cat hasn't got long left on this planet, just want to curl up into a ball and disappear for a while. Oh well I'm sure tomorrow will be better......

missrlr

Morning, so sorry to hear about your poorly puss cat. Several things, have you considered animal charities for the vet stuff? PDSA may be able to help.

Also regarding the house and feeling blergh about it - been there done that and here is how I booted myself up the b@m bit of psychological warfare here - the hall / entrance is the first bit you see EVERY time you enter the house. I one day realised I was walking into the house with my eyes shut. Didn't want to see it. It is usually a reasonably easy space to attack as it's quite small and not loads of hidey holes. (see this is the psychology bit) Just stop and open the front door take a look at what you can see when you first come through the door. then work out what you want to see or need to be in that space. What exactly SHOULD it be used for (be sensible here, although a little dreaming is good for the soul we are not here to start knock walls down and doing a major rebuild yet!)
So for instance you may decide that you want to see one coat per person and one pair of shoes by the door with an umbrella. Decide which items fit this bill and REMOVE everything else, dump it in the bedroom of the people to whom it belongs. If it is broken and of zero value or unsellable get a big bin liner and make this the new home for it. I chose the one item rule as really you can change the coat with the seasons and more than one you cannot wear at any point int time without looking very silly. usually.

If you have a table what NEEDS to be on there - possibly post? In trays for people (use old cardboard boxes with the front flaps cut down and covered in recycled paper or painted with a remnant of a tin of paint has worked for me in the past) and perhaps a note pad and pen. Again the rest GOES - if it is broken and not worth selling then INTO THE BIN, the rest again gets moved to the owners bed.

Once the tidying part is done then give it a swipe don't forget to wipe the light switches, door handles and the light fittings too plus any grubby marks on the walls. Change light bulbs if needed. I usually do to the bottom of the stairs and NO FURTHER. Stairs are a separate project. Then point out that on pain of death does anyone add to this haven of calm and tidy. If anything gets plonked there, straight up to the offenders room.

You now have a CLEAN decluttered hallway, when you come in - this will lift you up and as it is generally a small area you can do this easy peasy.

Do you actually know what is in the cupboards / freezer? Might be worth a complete inventory and then meal plan accordingly. You probably have some real gems you can use as a surprise / pick me up / treat meal with no /limited additional spend. We played the eat the freezer and the cupboards game (not literally) where we were not permitted to buy anything expect bread and veg from the supermercardo. Focuses the mind especially towards the end!

You can do this debt thing, I know you say you can talk to OM, can you talk and explain to DS also? He needs to realise what is going on so he can help and feel part of this family journey.

Good idea with the cash, be strict, WIGIG is not just a marketing strategy for supermarkets to get more money from you - it helps you stop too! If necessary take out the cash allocation for the month and FREEZE the card (in fact why not cut up or freeze the other offending cards - if you haven't got them you can't spend them. Also delete the cards from online purchase places so you can't "accidentally" spend.

You may be surprised at the effect of having one clear area has on the whole house, perhaps you can get the three of you to "attack" other areas and declutter with the aim of selling - if DS has stuff perhaps what he sells he can keep the profits off (donations to pitch etc also deducted of course!) so he can see the benefit of this?

I hope you are not offended by the step by step guide above, but it worked for me.

time for ear tickles for poorly puss cats, here's hoping she is not in pain and wishing you strength.

Loobeyloop

thanks again, it's nice to speak to someone who understands, hope your house is now in a better state

one last thing, what does wigig mean?
x