New series of Spendaholics

Pan_3

TallGirl wrote:

I quite like the programme and the look on the emotional side. However I agree why did they not get him to sell some of those DVD's rather than just hide them away.

The therapy is a bit spookey but he obviously had some issues that needed to be worked through and I am sure we did not see the whole of the session he had.

I thought it was interesting that nothing was made of the fact that his girlfriend did not stop bailing him a bit sooner. If she had he would have had to stop spending so much money.

This shows a slight misunderstanding of how strong the compulsion to spend is with some people. People often know that they cannot afford to buy the items that they are and that it is going to lead to problems, but they are often powerless to stop themselves.

This is a powerful addiction we are dealing with and like all addictions there are often underlying issues that drive this and that need to be tackled before any real practical progress can be made.

lil_me

I like Spendaholics, with soem it's like looking at me a few years ago, I like doing the cold turkey thing on myself every now and again to kick my own butt, but I also realise how sensible I am now watching those who spend so much on luxuries!

morg_monster

I was also surprised he didn't sell more stuff - but then remembered he was a film student, so suppose he needs some of it for that. And if he has now reined in his spending so that he can now start paying off his debt, the amount he might get from selling them might not make a huge difference to the length of time he's paying it off (I know I've seen threads about this 'do i sell something precious to me' dilemma a few times on this forum). Also - the more nights he can stay in watching them rather than going out and doing something else more expensive!
I guess being a film student was also the reason behind his DVD budget not being cut to £0 as well!

I couldn't believe how selfish he was to start with, but also I thought it was just so sad that a 30-something guy with a family was still behaving in this way. Like above people have said, in Spendaholics there are always massive issues behind the people's spending, and they have to get to the bottom of this before they can curb the spending. Plus they must spend days with him to get the one hour programme, so like others have said must have been lots of behind the scenes "boring" but essential stuff there too.

I love spendaholics! Although I found the people in bank of mum and dad were sometimes more shocking financially ...

Bargain_Rzl

I think they're almost always too soft with the cold turkey budget. The bloke last night was given £120 to manage the whole of his family's outgoings for a week - which (correct me if I'm wrong) doesn't include rent or bills? Well, BIG DEAL is all I can say. That's not a generous budget particularly, but by the standards of "cold turkey" I'd have thought £60 for the week would be perfectly manageable (I'm single, and this week I've spent £3.60 so far - I started the week with £21.50 in my purse and will probably have change by the end of the week! And I'm not in debt!)

I wonder what became of the lady from the last series, Lynne, who lived in a complete fantasy universe (oh ok, in East London) with twin sons and £40k of debt? I hope she's still on track because by the end of the programme I really liked her.

I definitely wish Alvin would come back, too, and Bank of Mum and Dad...

Xenomorhic

mizmir wrote:

Thanks Kathfisch - this was the guy with the gorgeous stoves made out of VW parts - and the woman who ran yoga classes for surfers? They were the only ones of those I saw (I missed the first few) who seemed to have a hope in hell of paying off their mortgage. Will be interested to see how his business went - I would've bought one of his stoves if I could've afforded it!!

His site is still there- a good sign I hope! http://www.hotcreations.co.uk/hotpod/hotpod.html

I also found the website of another of the participating couples businesses apparently fully active; remember this?
http://www.candycrystal.co.uk/

System

Ive just watched it and I thought the part where he stood him on London Bridge and made him hold that 'Loser' sign aloft. The presenter stated that he spends so much time and effort in hiding his inadequacies such as; complex, attention from his wife and of course his debts and all this energy his holding him back. Wow that is exactly how I feel trying to 'cover up' my financial mess of a situation. I shelled a lot of it coming on this site. But I am still battling against this image that I want to potray.....

Lenny

kathfisch

lennymfo wrote:

Ive just watched it and I thought the part where he stood him on London Bridge and made him hold that 'Loser' sign aloft. The presenter stated that he spends so much time and effort in hiding his inadequacies such as; complex, attention from his wife and of course his debts and all this energy his holding him back. Wow that is exactly how I feel trying to 'cover up' my financial mess of a situation. I shelled a lot of it coming on this site. But I am still battling against this image that I want to potray.....

Lenny

I agree Lenny - that bit really made me think! It was the fact that he was afraid of being a loser (and didn't want people to know that's how he felt) but equally he didn't want to be a winner because he'd feel guilty, I totally identify with that but I hadn't thought of it like that before!

I'm really looking forward to the Did They Pay Off Their Mortgage In Two Years on the 11th, Dan and Lucy were my favourite couple and I agree that they seemed the most likely to make it happen. Someone please remind me on the 11th :rotfl:

Pan wrote:

I empathised with so much in the show tonight...my lightbulb moment was not realising how much debt I was in but rather realising that I was buying a lifestyle to hide the person I thought I was from others. Just like the guy in tonights show I spent £1000's on items that I thought would make me a more valid and worthwhile person. I thought that the issues raised tonight and the way they where handled made for interesting viewing and may well have made our plight more understandable to those people who think we are just selfish, stupid, immature or just downright irresponsible.

Well said! I've been realising lately that its all very well being strict with myself and paying off debts, but if I don't address the underlying issues then I'll just end up in the same mess again. Its a slow and complicated process of learning about myself and making changes, fair enough its condensed into an hour for tv's sake but its great that this process is being shown!

zippygeorgeandben

hi guys,

not posted for ages but reading this thread did give me the urge!

I love spendaholics and Jay Hunt's advice but the 'psychologist' Benjamin (anyone who wants to be known as benjamin and not ben is a bit of a prat in my eyes, scroll down the post to see what my name is!) I find really really creepy.

He seems DETERMINED to make the person cry. It's like if he hasn't succeeded in making them breakdown, it's like a defeat for him.

personally, i fast forward the bit where he is talking and funnily enough, i do the same when gillian mckeith is talking about poo samples on YRWUEAT!

Hmm is there a connection between Benjamin and poo samples!

Hope everyone has a prosperous new year.

ben
xxx

TepidWater

Totally agree with you Zippy/Ben. Ben(jamin)'s inputs are almost always skipped in our house. My work brings me into contact with therapists and they regularly criticise his techniques. More to do with TV than remedy methinks!

Also, I might be dreaming (having a nightmare) about this but wasn't Ben(jamin) substituted for an equally nauseating "therapist" in some shows. I recall that another presenter with a similarly vacant look accompanied Jay in a few episodes.

lynzpower

its the forcefulness of benjamins input that particularly aggravates me.

He seems DETERMINED to make the person cry. It's like if he hasn't succeeded in making them breakdown, it's like a defeat for him.

Absolutely bang on the mark.

some of jays comments in the last series were nothing productive at all. Yes, Im still going on about buying a 2 quid loaf of bread.

I would almost go as far as to say that cesranas was better, but Alvins was great, but no one beats King Martin :money: in terms of common bloody sense.