17 year old son being bullied by boss

bluenoseam

The slaps are the key here.

Now if it's a full blown slap, yeah it's assault, but how much are you sure it's not the sort of playfull stuff we all pull with our mates, he's your son and as much as people will disagree with me here, you're more likely to be protective of him.

As for the bullying, well, there is a well known saying "if you can't stand the heat", you haven't mentioned his overall feeling about this job or work in general, there's one of three things going on here: A - he sucks at the job and as such is being ridden by the boss, B - he doesn't like the job & is taking everything negatively in order to manufacture the way out, C - he is being bullied. You aren't there, it's his word versus the chef right now and ultimately that's your problem right now. I'm not meaning to sound disrespectful & cast doubt on your child, but ultimately how much of it is the fact he isn't taking criticism well?

Then we have the other fact, if he does complain, he's toast & well, what people are saying is right, if he has designs on working in a kitchen again he'll be doing it out of town & without a reference from this job as they will refuse to give a reference which is almost as telling as a bad reference. Now fair or not isn't open to debate here, it will happen and that's the thing people are pointing out, kitchens are NOT a place for the feint of heart and well, its a place where people aren't backwards in expressing their opinion.

3v3

custardy wrote: »

Marco Pierre was seemingly a whole different animal in his day
I heard many tales of the punishments handed out for falling foul of his wrath

And GR trained under him

hcb42

scheming_gypsy wrote: »

they don't rule the local economy but if your only reference is somebody you reported for assault instead of asking them to stop.... then the only way you'll get a glowing reference is when they stick it in the fire.

he is 17, anyone in the trade knows what some chefs are like, he will be ok. Better that than putting up with bullying from some idiot.

custardy

3v3 wrote: »

And GR trained under him

who do you think told me

3v3

custardy wrote: »

who do you think told me

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

GothicStirling

My sister used to work for Nick Nairn. Nice bloke, though not the angel people think he is. His language makes Ramsey look like Mother Theresa.

scheming_gypsy

that doesn't surprise me, i heard that mother Theresa was a right dirty mouthed !!!!ing !!!! of a !!!! !!!! !!!!

WolfSong2000

When I was around the OP's sons age, I used to work as a waitress, but had some issues with one of the temp chefs that was hired - nothing physical, but there was verbal bullying and a raft of sexual remarks made toward me. I took it for so long then snapped and had a full blown (verbal!) argument with him in the kitchen and ended up reducing the guy (a grown man) to tears. Admittedly, not my finest moment, but sometimes (and this needs to be judged carefully) it pays to stand up for yourself. As it was, the chef's contract wasn't renewed and I wasn't reprimanded at all, so worked out fine for me. For the record I got on fine with all the other staff, including the chef's.

The OP's son has to judge how to best resolve the situation - I'd start by calmly explaining that the chef's behaviour isn't acceptable, see where that gets him. If that fails, there's plenty of other options.

newmrslockwood

Thank you all for your comments although some more helpful than others!
My son decided to confront the said chef! and he has agreed to lay off a bit!
The bullying wasn't just the slap! it was also verbal! He was very aggressive, more than i would deem acceptable. He was showing my son up in front of the rest of the staff. Calling him "C**T" and then making him repeat it. My son knows how it gets in a kitchen, he is not a big baby and i am proud of the fact that he can talk to me about his problems. He is at college full time and took on the job to get some experience alongside his course.
The chef in question is known as a bit of a nutter, my sons Head chef at college told him when he started the job. And at 17 he is still a minor and whilst still in my care it is my job to protect him.

Oh yeah and any type of physical violence is out of order!

My son is going to look for another job but continue working there till he finds one! i am very proud of him for being so grown up about this matter! Most Boys his age wouldn't

GothicStirling

newmrslockwood wrote: »

He was showing my son up in front of the rest of the staff. Calling him "C**T" and then making him repeat it.

Again, quite normal behaviour in a kitchen. Unless you've worked in one, it's difficult to appreciate how high pressurized one is.