terrible neighbours.....

gratefulforhelp_2

Grimbal wrote: »

The road is inhabited by older people (60+) who have all lived there for 30+ years. I think they've settled into a comfortable self-assurance that comes with living on a "good" road. We're at least 20 years younger than most of them, and I worry that they're concerned that we'll be destabilising the status quo. It could also be that they're all doing a bit of "posturing" in order to confirm the pecking order as it were

I would say you are right on both counts.

I was told off by last neighbour for taking down a ratty old conifer that was half dead in my own garden 'cos she liked to look at it.

I think thats seeing what she could get away with.

patman99

So OP, you haven't been tempted to buy and old 'skip' from ebay and park it where the contractors do have you?.

KateLiana27

Grimbal wrote: »

The road is inhabited by older people (60+) who have all lived there for 30+ years. I think they've settled into a comfortable self-assurance that comes with living on a "good" road. We're at least 20 years younger than most of them, and I worry that they're concerned that we'll be destabilising the status quo. It could also be that they're all doing a bit of "posturing" in order to confirm the pecking order as it were

I think you've got it. It's like being the new kid in school. Unfortunately age doesn't necessarily bring maturity.

Go round again to each one and be excessively, gushingly nice, apologise profusely if anyone has parked incorrectly and asking them to let you know if it ever happens again so you can sort it out. Tell them you would never dream of putting wallpaper down the toilet and you've never even heard of such a thing before, in a hurt tone of voice. By the end they should be feeling thoroughly ashamed of their pettiness and keep their grumblings to themselves in future

kataklysm

I have to say I wouldn't be half as subservient as some here suggest They might have lived there for years, but it's newcomers like you that prop up their house prices... And it's not like they've made much of an effort so far is it? Baking muffins for someone who bangs on my door, accuses me of blocking my own toilet, moans about visitors and generally pokes their nose into my business? Good god. I'm not saying make things worse/inflame the situation or be deliberately obtuse, but going out of your way to apologise for absolutely nothing would surely set you up for a life of tip-toeing around the neighbourhood for fear of upsetting someone.

It did occur to me though that your neighbours might have had problems with those drains before you moved in, and now they're trying to pin the blame on you..

alun4

KateLiana27 wrote: »

I think you've got it. It's like being the new kid in school. Unfortunately age doesn't necessarily bring maturity.

Go round again to each one and be excessively, gushingly nice, apologise profusely if anyone has parked incorrectly and asking them to let you know if it ever happens again so you can sort it out. Tell them you would never dream of putting wallpaper down the toilet and you've never even heard of such a thing before, in a hurt tone of voice. By the end they should be feeling thoroughly ashamed of their pettiness and keep their grumblings to themselves in future

This is the mature way that you will become "one of them" And I guess that is what you want as you have chosen the area. I'm sure it will have it's rewards a the years pass. In established "communities" everyone is very fearful of new blood.

Davesnave

We rented in a road like that before we bought our present house. Having a bright yellow Transit didn't help us much, but when we discovered that some folk had been in the cul de sac 20+ years and still didn't know the names of folk at t'other end, we threw a party. There was a good take-up, because most residents hadn't seen inside our landlord's mother's old house for many years!

So, when we moved to our new place with 5+ acres of 'insulation' from the neighbours, we imagined things would be easier. Not so. Within months we received a request that we desist from selling tomato and other plants from our front garden, and also we had people questioning 'how much' we were going to use the shared access to our land and barn. This was a bit rich, as there is a clause in the deeds requiring us to pay 10% of the maintenance of said access.

Later, we also had a complaint that, after cutting our field hedges, our 'neighbour' 250m away could see us, so had lost his privacy. (This from someone whose dogs can bark for hours on end.) Ironically, his son cuts all the other hedges on our property and the surrounding land.

We referred the tomato complainant to the rules surrounding farm gate sales, sent the access complainants the relevant paragraph from our title docs giving us right of access "at all times and for all purposes," and as for the guy with the dogs.....well I've just bought a chain saw and, come winter, he's going to find out that I like my log burner just as much as he likes his privacy!

I believe there are things called fences, which sometimes one can mend, but in his case erecting one would be the better option! :rotfl: