Playing a game ? Or being serious ?

MichaelCR

Hey Everyone ! Me again !

MSE should start charging me for this ! haha

I have made a few posts about a break up im going through in the past few days ! I just want to say my upmost thanks to everyone who has helped me on these forums ! You lot are amazing !

My girlfriend broke up with me last week, We went through a rough patch. I went no contact for 24 hours from Wednesday through till Thursday this week (She told me to leave her alone after many attempts to try to get her back). However yesterday morning she phoned me. She started talking to me however i simply said i was busy and hung up.

I told her to move on, She texted me saying 'Great, Nice to see i ment something to you' basically meaning that she thinks i dont care about her and never have done. I stupidly replied saying 'It did and still does, Why do you think i've tried so hard to show you how much i love you the past few days'. Anyways we met up (Arrrrgh). We started talking and she told me that she 'Wants to try again', At first she wanted friends, And i told her no chance. We went for a walk, Sat down, And well, Kissed for about 5 minutes, Which felt so right :S. I then took her hand and started running, We ran to a place where we first met, And kissed again, Lied down together cuddling, Before moving on elsewhere, We sat in a field and just talked and talked, Then kissed for ages. We left holding hands, And we parted saying 'I love you' and kissing.

Basically, Today we said we would try and take it slow, Give it another chance.

Today, I asked her how are we going to go about doing this ? She said that we will keep it to ourselves incase it didn't work, I said to her that why does she care what other people think! She hasn't told anyone we've been seeing each other etc etc.

My worries are,

- That she isn't telling anyone because maybe she's liking the attention shes getting off guys perhaps ?
- She isn't interested in actually giving it another chance, But just having someone to be intimate with ?
- She doesn't want her friends to find out ?
- She is kind of close to this boy who has 'Supported' her apparently, Like he took her out to some local gig.

Am i to worry ? Or is this perfectly normal ?

Thanks !

rachbc

chill out - go out with her if you won't, don't if you don't but stop analysing everything she does and said. Your 19 - whatever you do now you'll look back on with a wry smile wonder why you ever got in such as state about this

chergar

I don't think it is normal, she is playing with your feelings and treating you like something she can pick up and put down as the notion takes her. If you are happy to live like this then fine go for it but don't you think you can do much better and be with someone who treats you right and the relationship is more even rather than her calling the shots all the time.
However you are both still quite young, what age is she?

MichaelCR

chergar wrote: »

I don't think it is normal, she is playing with your feelings and treating you like something she can pick up and put down as the notion takes her. If you are happy to live like this then fine go for it but don't you think you can do much better and be with someone who treats you right and the relationship is more even rather than her calling the shots all the time.
However you are both still quite young, what age is she?

I'm 19 (20 in 3 weeks time) and she's 17.

We've been together 14+ Months.

It just sounds so suspect to me

Brokenhearted

I have just broken up with my OH - literally tonight! we have been together nearly 13 years and engaged for 7. He doesnt think he loves me in the right way and hasnt for a while.

I hate to say it, but this young lady doesnt sound like she is being wholly fair. Why keep it a secret? If it doesnt work, it doesnt work. There is no need to hide, unless there are other motives behind it? I would tread very carefully, becuase you will be the one who gets hurt, not her

MichaelCR

Brokenhearted wrote: »

I have just broken up with my OH - literally tonight! we have been together nearly 13 years and engaged for 7. He doesnt think he loves me in the right way and hasnt for a while.

I hate to say it, but this young lady doesnt sound like she is being wholly fair. Why keep it a secret? If it doesnt work, it doesnt work. There is no need to hide, unless there are other motives behind it? I would tread very carefully, becuase you will be the one who gets hurt, not her

So sorry to hear that ! Hope you're ok ? I went through it a few days ago, Just keep your head up !

It sounds all to suspect to me, Besides, Who cares what other people think of her being back in a relationship with me after a massive break up ! Surely the only 2 people who should care are me or her !

Love. SUCKS ! haha.

Elle7

I'm a few months older then you. It's nice to see other youngsters round here

Anyway, the best advice I've ever been given was that the one who is worth the pain won't hurt you. She doesn't sound like she is. I suspect she likes the devotion and attention she gets from you, but also likes getting this from other guys, hence keeping your relationship secret.

Don't agree to be her second choice. You'll only get hurt! Be strong and walk away. Time is precious

Brokenhearted

elle 7! you've made me feel proper old now!:p

Michael tbh I am pretty numb atm, it has been a stressful 10days or so.

You've been together 14mths? To me it sounds like she really needs to start to grow up. she will find out messing with peoples feelings only comes back to bite you on the !!!!

polejunkie

As soon as you said she wanted to keep it a secret I guessed she was pretty young. Your either the booty call or you dont really fit in with her whole image and doesnt want a ribbing from her mates.

soup

You seem to have ignored all the advice given to you on your other thread where most people advised you stay away from her and delete all contact details
Why ask for more advice as you will ignore it and do what you want.

MichaelCR

Elle7 wrote: »

I'm a few months older then you. It's nice to see other youngsters round here

Anyway, the best advice I've ever been given was that the one who is worth the pain won't hurt you. She doesn't sound like she is. I suspect she likes the devotion and attention she gets from you, but also likes getting this from other guys, hence keeping your relationship secret.

Don't agree to be her second choice. You'll only get hurt! Be strong and walk away. Time is precious

Yeah !

Pretty much what i thought to be honest. Thanks !

Brokenhearted - Everyday is precious, Just recently i have woken up early for the sunrise, It kind of makes you appreciate what you do have in life. Just remember, Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a gift. That's why we call it the present.