Am I right?

Annieuk75

Sorry this is a long one...just need some advice please (not sure if this is the right forum either?)

I'll try to make it short...I live with my husband (who is registered blind) in specialised housing for Blind and Visually impaired people. There are roughly 56 units onsite, ranging from bedsits to a bungalow. There are also support staff on site 24 hours. Going back 3 years, I noticed that the Maintenance Man had stopped talking to us, and didn't acknowledge me when I spoke to him. I had a quiet word with the deputy manager and he told me to make an official complaint...which I did. The findings came back with him saying that he never inroad me. I then thought maybe I had made a mistake. Anyway, he continued to ignore me and blank me when I spoke. So I made another complaint, again he said he wasn't. A few months after this, fed up of him ignoring me and him denying it, I confronted him onsite. He admitted to me that he did ignore me and said it was because he was "disgusted with me" at the way I spoke to a neighbour. It turned out he had witnessed a disagreement between my self and a neighbour, though he only witnessed a small part and therefore made a snap judgement. I was so upset, the deputy manager was close by and heard some of the conversation. I then made yet another complaint and following a lot of meetings, he still denied that he was ignoring me. I took the complaint all the way through to the Trustees but they always took his side. I then got video evidence of me entering a room, saying hello and him not even turning to make an acknowledgement, but they still believe him. I have suffered depression in the past and all of this has made me very ill. I have had panic attacks when he has been near my home, but the management here don't seem to care. They still state that if any repairs need to be done in our home, that he will have to have access. Our switch broke in our bathroom last weekend andI spent the entire time worrying that they would send him in to repair it.
Basically, am I allowed to refuse him access, or can I ask that they make reasonable adjustment to help us. I am at the end of my tether with this and don't know what to do. At the last meeting I had with senior management, they told me that he denied that he ignores me, but said that his attitude towards me has changed! Isn't that the same. Also, he was never made to apologise for the way he spoke to me.
I would really appreciate some help with this or if anyone can direct me to someone who can help...thanks.

geordieracer

Paragraphs please.

Tubbss

dont wish to seem insensitive but you made compaints cos someone didnt say hello? Ignore him back and move on. Lifes too short to let this kind of thing dominate your life!

gordikin

You have made several complaints about this man who has actually done you no harm and you expect him to talk to you? Now you don't want him to do his job if he is required by his employer to enter your property? I think you need to take a step back and relax/chill/count to 10.

Tiddlywinks

Oh for goodness sake... so, someone doesn't speak to you when you say hello.. you have spent 3 years complaining about it?

As long as the worker does his job and does not go out of his way to be rude to you then just accept that he doesn't want to exchange pleasantries with you. Why should he be forced to speak with you anyway?

You sound a little obsessed with him to be honest, perhaps you need to speak to your GP about this as it really isn't normal behaviour. If you continue to pick on him then you are likely to be seen as the villain and, ultimately, they could ask you to leave as they do not have to tolerate harassment from residents.

kazzah60

it is this gentlemans right to ignore you - he witnessed an altercation and made a judgement based on what he overheard.

I believe he got the measure of the sort of person you are from that altercation and chose to not acknowledge you when you spoke to him.

By making complaints to the trustees about his conduct you have simply proven to him that his opinion of you was well founded.

your complaints were completely unnecessary and over the top - if that is all you have to worry about in your life then you are indeed a lucky person

let is drop - it is HIS CHOICE to speak to you or ignore you - you cannot force him to speak to you and personally if I were you, I would be embarassed at the amount of trouble you have caused this gentleman.

DCFC79

Annieuk75 wrote: »

Sorry this is a long one...just need some advice please (not sure if this is the right forum either?)

I'll try to make it short...I live with my husband (who is registered blind) in specialised housing for Blind and Visually impaired people. There are roughly 56 units onsite, ranging from bedsits to a bungalow. There are also support staff on site 24 hours. Going back 3 years, I noticed that the Maintenance Man had stopped talking to us, and didn't acknowledge me when I spoke to him. I had a quiet word with the deputy manager and he told me to make an official complaint...which I did. The findings came back with him saying that he never inroad me. I then thought maybe I had made a mistake. Anyway, he continued to ignore me and blank me when I spoke. So I made another complaint, again he said he wasn't.

A few months after this, fed up of him ignoring me and him denying it, I confronted him onsite. He admitted to me that he did ignore me and said it was because he was "disgusted with me" at the way I spoke to a neighbour. It turned out he had witnessed a disagreement between my self and a neighbour, though he only witnessed a small part and therefore made a snap judgement. I was so upset, the deputy manager was close by and heard some of the conversation. I then made yet another complaint and following a lot of meetings, he still denied that he was ignoring me. I took the complaint all the way through to the Trustees but they always took his side. I then got video evidence of me entering a room, saying hello and him not even turning to make an acknowledgement, but they still believe him. I have suffered depression in the past and all of this has made me very ill.

I have had panic attacks when he has been near my home, but the management here don't seem to care. They still state that if any repairs need to be done in our home, that he will have to have access. Our switch broke in our bathroom last weekend andI spent the entire time worrying that they would send him in to repair it.

Basically, am I allowed to refuse him access, or can I ask that they make reasonable adjustment to help us. I am at the end of my tether with this and don't know what to do. At the last meeting I had with senior management, they told me that he denied that he ignores me, but said that his attitude towards me has changed! Isn't that the same. Also, he was never made to apologise for the way he spoke to me.
I would really appreciate some help with this or if anyone can direct me to someone who can help...thanks.

hang on so you made a complaint because the guy didn't acknowledge you when you spoke to him and now your worried he might ignore you more.

As long as the guy does any work thats needed in your house then whats the problem.

geordieracer

How did you get hold of this 'video' and how does it show you saying hello to him? Is there sound? can the video see you moving your lips? Why care if someone ignores you?Why let yourself get all het up over something so petty?

I put up with reading that to find out there are more questions rattling round in my head then there was before i read it all.

For what its worth i reckon he is having an affair with your neighbour and you should take this up with your MP for his blatant bad behaviour

hcb42

Yes, it is not the school playground, if he doesnt want to talk to you, he doesnt have to.

MamaMoo_2

I feel sorry for this poor man.
He has decided that you are not the type of person he wishes to speak to, and so he ignores you. He doesn't verbally or physically attack you, he causes no trouble for you, and he still does his job by repairing things for you.
If I were him, I would point blank refuse to work in your property as you're clearly out to get him.
So someone ignores you! His job is to carry put maintenance, not to be your friend.
If I were you I would apologise to the poor man.
You're stressed because he ignores you?! How do you think he feels having his job constantly put in jeopardy?
He ignores you because you behaved, in his opinion, unacceptably. Just grow up and move on.
If you don't want him working in your house, then may I suggest you go and pay for your own maintenance?
As long as he's doing his job and not being abusive etc whilst doing so, then no, no-one should be expected to make special provisions for you.

Torry_Quine

I have to agree with others. You really are making this into something its not. In life there will always be people who 'ignore' us by we still have to live or work alongside them. After all this time and complaints you should be pleased he hasn't complained about you and do you really think he is going to acknowledge you now.