Not good after 20 week scan

southoftheriver

minimoneysaver wrote: »

Would having a 4D scan help? I think I paid about £120 for mine, but in your case, it would be peace of mind. Worth considering if they are still scratching their heads as there are some fantastic centres out there. x

Thats a nice thought. Are private 4D scans done by obstetricians? I don't know anyone who has had one. Just wondering because I think 4D scans are great when you want a sneak peek at baby, but unless they are done by a consultant (as opposed to a sonographer) you won't get any analysis of baby.

I think pigpen has it spot on. Amnio has its uses if you want to know exactly what is wrong so that you can face it head on, whatever decision you want to make. If you already know that you are going to continue with the pregnancy regardless than amnio is less beneficial.

Hope you have lots of support around you at the moment.

beakerange

Thanks all.
At the moment I am thinking that we will go for the amnio if any heart issues come up on Monday as to me that is a more obvious marker than "just being small".
I actually think I am 19 weeks (it would still be small) but it was the 12 weeks scan that brought me forward.
I a terrified of having and amnio, then having a miscarriage only to get the news that the baby was fine. I am not quite sure how I would cope with that. BUT selfishly I don't think mu OH or I would want to carry on with a pregnancy where there was a serious abnornality BUT we are getting perilously close to a termination being absolutely horrific because of how far along I am.
I am seriously considering a 4D scan regardless of the cost (now that's not the money saving expert way!!LOL) but if I thought it would help I would do it.
I just want this all to be a big mistake and that a small baby at this stage isn't so bad afterall.

LittleMissMPB

4D scans are done by trained professionals, I used this company and they were very good. The scan was actually done by a midwife who had trained as a sonographer... so not technically an obsterician but close enough in my eyes.

http://www.babybond.com/

JimmyTheWig

There's the question of dates - what were the measurements at the 12 week scan? How regular were you before you fell pregnant? When did tests first showing positive?
Then the question of accuracy of the technology. We were constantly told that our first born was going to be a giant baby. he was 8lb 12 which, though big, is not as big as they were suggesting. So they aren't accurate.

Then there's the question of how abnormal this is. For example, someone above mentioned the 0.25th percentile. That's pretty extreme. That's 1 in 400.
But, maybe it's not as extreme as it sounds. Take all the children in a 2-form entry primary school and line them up according to their size at their 20 week scan. Your unborn baby will be the same as the first in the line was at 20 weeks. Someone's got to be the smallest in the school. Doesn't mean they're going to have problems, though.

See what they say on Monday, but my advice is don't panic.

LittleMissMPB

TBH a termination even at 19weeks would be horrific in my opinion (miscarried at 16 weeks and having to go through labour and give 'birth' was traumatic enough).

If you think you are 19 weeks, and the baby is measuring at 17/18weeks then I really wouldn't worry. My daughter was measuring small all the way throughout pregnancy, and was born weighing 6lb 5, so a very healthy weight. My son 'measured' smaller and was born at 6lb 13.

I do however know of one person who had an amnio test and miscarried. They found out about 6months later that their child was perfectly healthy. It practically destroyed them.

Maybe you could ring somewhere that does the scans and just ask for their honest opinion on whether they would be able to help you or not? If it will give you some peace of mind/answers then why not?

southoftheriver

beakerange wrote: »

Thanks all.
At the moment I am thinking that we will go for the amnio if any heart issues come up on Monday as to me that is a more obvious marker than "just being small".
I actually think I am 19 weeks (it would still be small) but it was the 12 weeks scan that brought me forward.
I a terrified of having and amnio, then having a miscarriage only to get the news that the baby was fine. I am not quite sure how I would cope with that. BUT selfishly I don't think mu OH or I would want to carry on with a pregnancy where there was a serious abnornality BUT we are getting perilously close to a termination being absolutely horrific because of how far along I am.
I am seriously considering a 4D scan regardless of the cost (now that's not the money saving expert way!!LOL) but if I thought it would help I would do it.
I just want this all to be a big mistake and that a small baby at this stage isn't so bad afterall.

It's not selfish, you need to do what is right for you and your family. I really hope that the amnio reports back nothing serious and that you can relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy. If you want a 4D scan by all means get one! It wasn't a criticism at all.

LittleMissMPB wrote: »

4D scans are done by trained professionals, I used this company and they were very good. The scan was actually done by a midwife who had trained as a sonographer... so not technically an obsterician but close enough in my eyes.

http://www.babybond.com/

Not doubting that they are trained and no doubt very well, but they their role doesn't really compare to that of an obstetrician in the context of diagnostic scanning. Have a 4D scan to get a closer idea of what baby looks like is a lovely thing to do, but that sonographers job is to show you the images, not to interpret what they see. That is the job of obstetricans.

I'm just highlighting this because a friend of mine was made to believe that her 4d scan was being done by someone who could tell her baby was fine, and that isn't their role at all.

Best wishes OP please keep us updated.

CH27

At the risk of sounding harsh, could you & hubby cope with a disabled child?
Do you have family & friends locally to support you?

My hubby has two physically & mentally disabled cousins & while they are a joy to know they are also awfully hard work for their parents.

I hope everything is ok for you on monday xx

pozalina

Firstly, I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. It is horrible.

Personally I found the uncertainty/waiting the worst bit (worse than the eventual diagnosis of Edwards syndrome). Everyone is different and until you are in that position you don't know how you would feel/what you would do. I had always thought I would never have an amnio but at the 13wk scan when they told us the baby had a severe amount of fluid around the head and something was definitely wrong we both immediately wanted the cvs. I second what a pp said about asking for local miscarriage rates for amnio as some docs are much more experienced at it than others. Of course I was at an earlier stage than you and they knew for sure something was wrong, just didn't know what. I also agree about going with your gut instinct.

My last piece of advice is to take each day as it comes. It may seem overwhelming but just focus on getting through that day and face the next one when it comes. It was the only way we got through it.

I really hope there is nothing wrong and it is just dates/small baby.

meer53

I'd wait until Monday and get as much info as you can before making a decision as to what to do next. A few more days won't make a lot of differenece.

I had the triple test and my risk of a Downs baby was 1 in 16 so i was offered either amnio or cvs tests. The consultant asked me if we would consider termination if there was anything wrong, she said that if you won't consider termination then don't have any tests. Our reason for considering termination was that we already had a 13 year old son and felt that as we were older parents (we were both 42) it wouldn't be fair on him if we went ahead and i gave birth to a disabled child.

I opted for the CVS test as the results are faster than Amnio (next day) and found out that my daughter was fine. I also had to have 4 Amnio tests later in my pregnancy for different reasons. They aren't nice but i wanted to point out to you that although the risk of miscarriage is there, not to worry too much. All the way through my pregnancy the consultant kept saying "well, this is not the biggest baby in the world, we'll try to get you to 36 weeks then see how things are" My daughter was born at 35 weeks and weighed 3lbs 13oz which is very small for a 35 week baby.

She's 11 now and has suffered no ill effects from being small at birth. She was small all the way through, i hope all goes well for you next week xxx

make_me_wise

Doesn't it all depend on when you ovulate through your cycle as to how far along you are in your pregnancy. Maybe the month you concieved you ovulated late in which case for baby to measure 17/18 weeks when you think you are around 20 weeks isn't that way out is it.

My sil was told her baby was small for dates and had to go through several scans. She worried herself silly. In the end she went for a private 3d scan in london and all was fine. She is a tiny build herself so never was going to have a big baby. She used Create Health in Harley Street, London and saw Proffessor Campbell. Got full analysis done.

I hope you get some more answers next week that help you make your decision.