Husband coming for money

lilab_2

Thank you BitterandTwisted.

I had originally thought that I shouldn't tell him that I had a buyer, but of course the stupid me thought I should be honest. Wish I'd listened to the devil for once.

I am hoping to exchange on the flat by the end of the week as well.

His current salary is £30k, so I don't think he'll get legal aid.

Thanks everyone, I'll keep you posted. I really appreciate your comments and help.

jetta_wales

If you divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour or him being unfaithful (there's a more technical word for it they use that I can't remember) then that can greatly affect the financial outcome of the divorce

Infidelity! That's the word :-(

themull1

I didnt get legal aid, and my salary was £15,000.

lilab_2

Thank you themull1 and jetta_wales. I am divorcing him on adultery which he has admitted. Have done that through the county court, which of course I am paying for because he hasn't got any money. Should have the Decree Nisi in a few days time.

I won't tell him anything else now, I'll just keep my head down until the flat is completed on. I will be speaking to my conveycing solicitor tomorrow and I know that they have a family lawyer in the firm as well, so I'll sort that out too.

Thanks again.

mackemdave

jetta_wales wrote: »

If you divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour or him being unfaithful (there's a more technical word for it they use that I can't remember) then that can greatly affect the financial outcome of the divorce

Infidelity! That's the word :-(

Sorry but your statement is totally incorrect...Blame does not play any part in the finacial settlement of a divorce....The two things (divorce and finacials) are totally seperate.....

OP if you havnt sorted the finacials then the flat you are buying will got into the divorce pot and you could be forced to sell it....The cost of you buying the flat could be wasted money...To me you should be delaying the flat move until you have a consent order in place

clearingout

jetta_wales wrote: »

If you divorce on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour or him being unfaithful (there's a more technical word for it they use that I can't remember) then that can greatly affect the financial outcome of the divorce

Infidelity! That's the word :-(

divorce is 'no blame'. You can pretty much do anything to a spouse and it not affect the outcome of a financial hearing related to divorce. The only real affect bad behaviour can have is if one side has behaved so badly it affects the other's future - much quoted is the husband throwing acid in his model wife's face so she never works again. It has to be that bad before a judge might make an order involving bad behaviour.

lilab_2

so basically a chancer, which is what he is, can come along, take everything you've got and leave you to rot? Really? Then seems I don't stand much of a chance of having a life, which is what I am afraid of.

jetta_wales

Not what my solicitor told me, maybe as there were kids it was different but she wanted me to go for much more than 50/50 and especially because it was on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour.

terryw

lilab

Really sorry about your situation. Don't get side-tracked on this issue......Only certain conduct that is so serious that it would be inequitable for the court to disregard maybe taken into consideration in deciding the financials.

jetta,

yes, children would obviously affect the financials.

lilab_2

Thanks terryw. I just can't believe that morality plays no part in what the courts decide. He came to me in a bed of lies and debt, which of course I was stupid to fall for. How can it be that he could be allowed to walk away with what little is left of my children's inheritance and I could essentially be left homeless in a few years' time. I won't have enough to pay my bills past 5 years time if I am forced into rented accommodation now. It just seems so very unfair.