Me and DH have a different approach to money

Ronaldo_Mconaldo

And it really doesn't sound like you have the room to be too proud to claim JSA when you're already claiming all those other benefits. What comedy. Like someone said, you should start posting on the debt-free wannabe board and then in a few years make your way over to the bankruptcy board.

beasygirl

Thank you for the comments, although I do still feel this thread has changed course.

I would just like to point out that we do not need to claim JSA as a family we cover all of our outgoings and this is not what this thread was about

My debt free date is as it is because I decided to take on part time work to look after my family. Not that I have to justify it but we are not in a terrible debt situation and will not be going bankrupt thank you very much!

A debt free journey is that, it is individual to each person, and it will take as long as it does. So shoot me for putting my families welfare before money.

I'm taken the comments on board, and I will be putting my foot down and not let DH take the loan, I've showed him the DFW boards and to put it lightly he has not had his lightbulb moment yet (hence my concern) but I suppose as I'm out of work I can use this time to tighten the purse strigs and do my bit to get us sorted.

Sambucus_Nigra

But when he takes out the loan and puts everything on credit cards; you ARE going to need JSA to put towards the family expenses as you will have £1000 in interest in one year to pay off...plus the interest on the credit cards as the amount on them creeps up.

Pollycat

beasygirl wrote: »

We already receive child benefit and tax credits so I'm not going to accept anymore hand outs from the government, we can manage on one wage and have done for the last few years, that is not the issue and I don't really want this thread to go down that route.

I just want to make my husband understand that taking out a high interest loan and living off credit cards is not the way. He just does not realise this and thinks he's onto the next best thing. We have never been in a situation where I haven't been earning, I feel like I've lost my say into how things are done, and he now has control. It's not a nice feeling:(. But thank you for the comments so far, it's interesting to see how I come across.

But you obviously CAN'T manage on one wage - if you could manage, your OH wouldn't have taken out a loan with an extortionate interest rate.

You say you don't want this thread to go down that route (claiming benefits) and just want your OH to understand that taking out a high interest loan and living off credit cards is not the way but you are contributing to your financial problems by refusing to claim what you are entitled to.
That point really does have to be made.

I agree that you have big problems with your OH's attitude to money - both in his total lack of understanding of financial matters and his view that it's HIS money so it's HIS say how you do things.

This may sound harsh but if you don't get him to see sense NOW, you'll be changing your signature soon because your 'debt-free date' will definitely slip.

If I were you, I'd post on the DFW board, there's a SOA (Statement of Affairs) that you can fill in and you'll get lots of good advice.
http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

But I'd bet my bottom dollar that everyone will tell you that this loan is the most stupid idea ever and that "robbing Peter to pay Paul" is not a good idea.

74jax

Pollycat wrote: »

But you obviously CAN'T manage on one wage - if you could manage, your OH wouldn't have taken out a loan with an extortionate interest rate.

That's what I can't understand in this thread either. What are his reason's for the loan if you don't need the money to pay your monthly outgoings. It doesn't add up.

You say you can manage, and have been, on one full time salary, so for the past few years what has your full time salary gone on?

It's more confusing as the thread progresses.

JoJoB

Your DH wants to get a loan of £800 with huge interest.

You want to turn down £1600.

That is what your JSA would amount to over 6 months if you didn't manage to get a job in that time. You have PAID for this entitlement with your contributions.

Can you honestly say that you don't need £1600? Sorry if you feel like you are under attack, but it sounds like your hangups about claiming what you are entitled to are just as damaging as your partner's attitude towards credit.

Mojisola

beasygirl wrote: »

We have never been in a situation where I haven't been earning, I feel like I've lost my say into how things are done, and he now has control. It's not a nice feeling:(.

This is a serious problem and needs addressing.

How have you managed your money up to now? Have you both always earned about the same and split costs?

When you create a family, the income into that family is for the family. It doesn't matter who earns it.

melancholly

beasygirl wrote: »

I suppose as I'm out of work I can use this time to tighten the purse strigs and do my bit to get us sorted.

to not claim JSA as part of your bit to get you sorted it just plain mad. if you are choosing not to get the incomings available to you, then you are in no position to criticise your OH's attitude to money.

i know this sounds harsh, but what would you say to anyone else posting? is it about not wanting to go down to the dole office? not wanting people you know to see you? i just can't understand.

do what's sensible for your family - don't be driven by some misplaced pride.

nickyhutch

By refusing to take money you're entitled to, I think you're right in that you're losing a bit of control. Having said that, you're married - financial stuff has to be joint (especially when one of you isn't bringing money in).

Sambucus_Nigra

beasygirl wrote: »

We have never been in a situation where I haven't been earning, I feel like I've lost my say into how things are done, and he now has control. It's not a nice feeling:(.

Me neither - I was in a 50K job and at 43 - the next week; on JSA.

Get over it.