Me and DH have a different approach to money

beasygirl

and it's driving me mad...

I have just left my full time job to pursue part time work, this is so I am around for my 2 DD's who are in the early years of school.

As it stands I am unemployed for the first time in 8 years and my husband is now the breadwinner (again for the first time in 8 years) so I am totally reliant on what he brings in.

I've always been the sensible one, trying my hardest to make sure everything is paid on time, basically keeping us a float. We've had some rough times as everyone has but we've always managed to get by slowly redusing the debt and not taking any more out.

DH has been accepted for a £800 loan with a company called Aspire, paying back £150 a month over a year at an APR of about 50% This is to cover the rent this month (something my wage always covered) so his wages can all be saved up for next month and to include the new loan repayment of £150.

He wants us to pay for as much as possible by credit, basically paying his wages onto both our credit cards and then using the cards to pay bills. He can't seem to realise that this is a bad mistake. I've always used an SOA and budgeted. But because it is his money we have to do it this way.

Basically I'm scared, we're in a lot of debt because he loves to spend, so it's all down to him now. I have tried talking to him, but he tells me I'm stupid for not understanding him, and how this will clear the debt quicker whilst improving our credit rating by using the cards and going ahead with this loan.

I don't really know what I'm asking, maybe reassurance that I was going about it the correct way in trying to reduce the debts. Any comments would be appreciated...and I'm sorry for the length of the thread.:o

balletshoes

I'm not the best with money, although I do have a budget and try really hard to stick to it. But how can a 50% apr loan possibly help you reduce your bills and improve your debt situation????

pinkshoes

50% APR?!? I think he needs his head read! The situation would make me VERY nervous!

Could you not get an evening job when your two girls are in bed?

Surely as you're the one with time on your hands not working, it makes more sense for you to do the budget and sort out the finances?

pjread

£800 for £150 a month over a year? Wow. that's well over 50% on any scale I can think of, total payable £1800 so 1k interest on an average balance of half the loan amount over the year I'd say was about 250% APR ?

That is definitely a mistake (regardless if my calc is right or wrong). Even the worst credit card cash advance rate I've ever seen is far lower than that.

In fairness, over 90% of my own spending goes on a credit card (or three...) but they all get cleared in full every month. If you can't do that, you probably shouldn't be playing it that way IMO.

Eliza_2

beasygirl wrote: »

But because it is his money we have to do it this way..

Um no, it's your joint money, of course it is - he isn't a single man any more, you're in this together. You need to sit him down with your most serious face on you with the budget worked out ahead and work out the best way to do it. With both of you contributing to the discussion. Did you both jointly make the decision that you would stay at home for a while? And did he then realise the implications?

With you not earning and him still seeing life as a single man, you've no chance. If during your discussions he still seems keen on borrowing and living off credit then you need to find a way of keeping the money you earn separate, in an account that he can't access without your sayso. If he wants to act like a child you'll have to act like his mum!!

None of this seems to have been thought out properly. When I gave up work to be with my kids we planned and worked out in advancehow every penny would be spent. Jointly, together, with each taking responsibility. I'm really not sure you can afford it.

themull1

Do you mean you've got a part time job now, oryou've just left a full time job and unemployed? if the latter, and you knew what husband was like with money why leave your job?

beasygirl

themull1 wrote: »

Do you mean you've got a part time job now, oryou've just left a full time job and unemployed? if the latter, and you knew what husband was like with money why leave your job?

I had a part time job lined up and was due to start on Tuesday 3rd May , however they decided instead of having 2 part timers they would employ just the one person, but by the time they chnged this I had handed my notice in and a replacement had been lined up.

Now this job has fallen through we've had to change the budget and this is where DH told me of his plan. He wants to go down the route of robbing peter to pay paul, and cannot see any problems with this

I'm not about to start claiming any JSA, I haven't done so before and don't intend on doing it now. We will manage on the one wage. We have to.

I'm applying for part time jobs every day, and am not fussy I only want part time hours so will clean toilets if I have to.

firesidemaid

did you have your job offer in writing/email/text etc?

whilst you are looking for a job, you need to spend as little as possible. i would also suggest doing an soa for yourselves.

Mojisola

beasygirl wrote: »

I'm not about to start claiming any JSA, I haven't done so before and don't intend on doing it now. We will manage on the one wage. We have to.

You don't have to. You are entitled to contributions-based JSA for six months. With the way the job market is at the moment, I think you would be foolish not to claim it. It makes far more sense to claim it than to take out high interest loans.

If you don't want to rely it on, you could open another account, pay the JSA in each week and save it for the future. It could make the difference between managing in the future or having to take out loans again.

DVardysShadow

pjread wrote: »

£800 for £150 a month over a year? Wow. that's well over 50% on any scale I can think of, total payable £1800 so 1k interest on an average balance of half the loan amount over the year I'd say was about 250% APR ?

457% according to the calculator here

nickyhutch

You've left a full time job and are now unemployed, wont claim JSA, but are complaining about your OH's attitude to money?