wedding plus 1!

clearing_out_my_pockets

MissGG wrote: »

OMG - PLUS BLOODY ONES! I'm not even getting married until June 2012 and already we have had 'heated discussions' on this. My MIL2B is adamant that my H2B's older sister must be permitted a plus one. His sister is a 33 year old woman who will be surrounded by her own family and is actually a bridesmaid too (to keep the peace).

MIL2Bs reasoning went like this ...'well XX will DEFINETLEY have a boyfriend by then I know it and, if not, she will need a plus one anyway and can take a freind'.........erm.........excuse me, i'm supposed to include on my guest list either an imaginary boyfriend who doesn't yet exist or a friend I have never met in my life - at £80 a head - no way! Forget who I upset, that is just plain ridiculous. Maybe a friend of hers in the evening if there is any leaway but not a sit down meal and a full day invite!

Rant over. For now, until this conversation repeats itself which I know without doubt it will lol

Might be worth pointing out to MIL2B that if SIL is a bridesmaid, her new boyfriend (imaginary though he may be) would be sitting by himself with people he doesn't know as SIL would be sitting on the top table. Has she no consideration for the man's imaginary feelings???

dktreesea

sammy_wheeler wrote: »

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-13047570 love this

my ohs niece isn't invited- we have been together 4 years and i have met her twice- she is 15 but never makes an effect to see us- therefore we put on oh's brother's invite- ???? and ????? (his gf) and didnt invite neice
i was fine with this- and so was oh. mil2b said shes the only grandaughter that isnt invited and its not really fair. i said- well ive seen her twice and money is tight so she isn't getting an invite!

sorry bit long winded!!


loving the article!

I agree with mil2b - it's mean to leave her out. A lot of 15 year olds are moody. Plus, this is your OH's blood, not yours, which means over the years this fact, that she was the ONLY one left out from his family, will be remembered for which you, and not your OH, will get the blame.

sammy_wheeler

dktreesea wrote: »

I agree with mil2b - it's mean to leave her out. A lot of 15 year olds are moody. Plus, this is your OH's blood, not yours, which means over the years this fact, that she was the ONLY one left out from his family, will be remembered for which you, and not your OH, will get the blame.

1.- shes not the only one being left out
2. we decided we only wanted ppl at our wedding who we see on a regular basis
3. we decided the guest list- and we are not changing it
4. im not having ppl there who we didnt orginally want there- not bein going to be made to invite ppl as an afterthought
5. its not a biggie at the end of the day

was just pointing out the article as its interesting that 'even the royals' has this issue!
rant over
dktreesea havent seen you around here before- whens the big day hope planning going well

trying_2_b_good

Not a single plus 1 is invited to our day do. Most family are in married couples anyway (ie married Aunty & Uncle) and most of our friends are in long term relationships and I now class their other halves as our friends. Those who are single (for example my brother and one uncle) can happily talk to the rest of the family and friends who would be there. In the evening, I really don't mind plus 1s, so OH's mates from footy can bring their girlfriends if they want. However, I am going to make the point of finding out their names first as I'm certainly not writing the phrase "plus 1" on any invites!!!

About OP's post... I'm not inviting my Aunty & Uncle on my Dad's side to my wedding because they've never made an effort with me since my Dad died when I was 11. Every family is different, and all relationships are different...but I will say this... It hurt me deeply that they didn't bother to send me birthday cards or call me or even have my phone number or my address when I was 15. And the older I get, the more it annoys me - because as a 15 year old, you shouldn't have to make an effort with your family. You're still a child and take these things for granted. Adults should know better & it was their responsibility to take an interest in my life, not the other way around.

trying_2_b_good

PS sammy - not having a go, just giving an opinion & agree on most things about why she's not invited. Just touched a nerve xxx

sammy_wheeler

obviously theres a lot of background that im not going to go into on here- but lets just end my bit on- we aren't changing the guest list

back to will and kate-
i wonder if they made there own guest list- can you imagine them sitting down with a piece of paper and working out who to invite and where to sit them hehe

trying_2_b_good

I doubt it! I wonder how many of her family & friends are actually allowed to go?? It's probably just hundreds of people they've never met!!

LEJC

Theres a programme on c4 on monday I think at 9pm interviewing some of Kates cousins/aunties etc and the trailer looks as if they are being prortrayed in a less than flattering way..I bet if the queen watches it she would wish she could un invite a few!!
I also read that theres a few exes going..I guess to some thats not strange but wouldn't have contemplated it at our wedding!

In my opinion for what its worth...you should make a guest list and stick to it...if that means you dont invite plus ones thats your decision...you cant please all the people all the time so just make sure you please someone..yourself!....once extended family start to be invited it really does become difficult..you either have to invite them all or draw the line so its close family only.

csh_2

dktreesea wrote: »

I agree with mil2b - it's mean to leave her out. A lot of 15 year olds are moody. Plus, this is your OH's blood, not yours, which means over the years this fact, that she was the ONLY one left out from his family, will be remembered for which you, and not your OH, will get the blame.

Agree

trying_2_b_good wrote: »

. And the older I get, the more it annoys me - because as a 15 year old, you shouldn't have to make an effort with your family. You're still a child and take these things for granted. Adults should know better & it was their responsibility to take an interest in my life, not the other way around.

Agree

sammy_wheeler wrote: »

obviously theres a lot of background that im not going to go into on here- but lets just end my bit on- we aren't changing the guest list

back to will and kate-
i wonder if they made there own guest list- can you imagine them sitting down with a piece of paper and working out who to invite and where to sit them hehe

Would never in a million years have referred to a neice as a 'plus 1' that would come under the family heading for me. Plus 1's are ususally the hangers on and casual bf/gf. I would have said that future BIL's gf was the 'plus 1' here and not the neice...as she isn't a blood relative and I assume they aren't married...


If there is so much background and you didn't want people commenting on your situation with your neice why mention it?

sammy_wheeler

have you seen the timings for the wedding?-
1015 BST - The groom and Prince Harry arrive at Westminster Abbey
1051 BST - The bride, and her father, leave the Goring Hotel for Westminster Abbey
1100 BST - The marriage service begins
1230 BST - The bride's carriage procession arrives at Buckingham Palace


i love that kate has to arrive at 10.51- what a strange time!