CSA Payments seem way too high - HELP!

FBaby

mrsspendalot wrote: »

The way to try and deal with it is not to think about the PWC or the child, and see the figure as a bill. Imagine it is your gas or electric bill which has just doubled - you would simply have to find the money. Mentally detach all emotion from the payment - it is a bill like your council tax, rent/mortgage etc. It is amazing how quickly you adjust to not having the money when you have to.

That's the best advice I have ever read here

mum24boys

Brilliant advice from Mrsspendalot. Im a NRPP and a PWC. If you are prepared to do it, your DH can send a letter giving you consent to act on his behalf. We ended up doing this as my DH is useless with the CSA and agrees to anything as long as he can get them off the phone so i deal with it. That way i make sure everything is correct and carried out the way it should be. Do some research and try to get to grips with the way the CSA works and you be in charge of change of circs and hopefully this wont happen again.
As Mrsspend says treat it as a council tax bill, you have to pay it and try to detach yourself from it, or it will tear you up inside.
If you return to work the CSA wont take your income into consideration and your tax credits may drop so the assesment with CSA will drop. Maybe thats something to think about.
Good luck you will get through this.

fannyanna

mum24boys wrote: »

If you are prepared to do it, your DH can send a letter giving you consent to act on his behalf. We ended up doing this as my DH is useless with the CSA and agrees to anything as long as he can get them off the phone so i deal with it. That way i make sure everything is correct and carried out the way it should be. Do some research and try to get to grips with the way the CSA works and you be in charge of change of circs and hopefully this wont happen again.

I do the exact same thing. We'd be in a right mess (and broke) if I left it up to my husband :rotfl:

Blackpool_Saver

fannyanna wrote: »

I do the exact same thing. We'd be in a right mess (and broke) if I left it up to my husband :rotfl:

Most men seem to be like that, it's a myth that men deal with finances !!! women hold the purse strings nowadays !!

londonbabe73

simple

if he cant support the child he already had why is he having more ???!!! , and why is it always the new partner coming here not the the actual nrp ??!! if i was with a man who wasn't paying his way i wouldn't be with his period cause he has a track record and you might find yourself joining the queue for that csa p check a few years down the line ........

13Kent

Hi Grimsbyavon,

I sympathise with your situation.

One thing you could do to hurry things along is to take control and talk to the CSA yourself. Your hubby seems to be a "head in the sand" kind of guy, just letting things go until something happens to make him question the situation - ie continuing to pay the same amount despite his circumstances changing. If he talks to the CSA and tells them that he is giving you authority to talk to them on his behalf, and to act on his behalf then you can ring them and request that they send the data file, and you can also chase things up to speed things along a bit. My husband although having the best intentions would always say "I'll do it later" and a week later he still hadn't got round to it!! Things happened for us much more quickly when I was able to deal with the CSA on his behalf and get things sorted more quickly.

Hope this helps a bit. Good Luck!

fannyanna

londonbabe73 wrote: »

simple

if he cant support the child he already had why is he having more ???!!! , and why is it always the new partner coming here not the the actual nrp ??!! if i was with a man who wasn't paying his way i wouldn't be with his period cause he has a track record and you might find yourself joining the queue for that csa p check a few years down the line ........

It's not a case of not being able to support a child. It's just that maintenance payments will be reduced so that he can support all children.

As with the PWC the NRP should be free to move on and progress with his life - in the majority of cases that will involve meeting a new partner and possibly having children. You can't expect an NRP and most definately not a NRPP to put their lives on hold and not have children just to benefit a PWC and the child(ren) of the PWC and NRP.

I think you'll find the reason for the NRPP dealing with the CSA case and not the NRP is that in the majority of cases the NRP is a man. Need I say more :rotfl:. No, all joking aside I think rightly or wrongly the NRPP can feel screwed over (as I'm sure the NRP, PWC and basically anyone else that has to deal with the CSA does) and they want to try and get a handle on the situation. I think when it comes to the CSA a lot of NRP's would rather bury their heads in the sand and hope the situation goes away. It doesn't, it just gets worse and it will ultimately have an impact on the NRPP. I'm an NRPP with an NRP husband who would happily try to ignore trying to resolve problems with the CSA to our own detriment (although let me be clear that he has always paid maintenance).

I also think a lot of NRPP's handle cases as they don't have the emotional guilt that the NRP does. I think this also makes a NRP accept something which is adverse to them. The NRPP on the other hand will make a stand and try to fight for what is fair.

Rebecca01

I totally agree fannyanna. Couldn't agree more!

People can't say don't have more children and start a new life as the same could be said for the pwc about not being able to support their child. In that respect nobody would claim ctc or wtc Or even CB because we would all be rich. We aren't !

Also the OP has stated her partner did pay maintenance but it looks Like he didn't inform then when he was out of work , so the payments are higher than what they may have been , this is a completely different issue than him not paying any maintenance at all.

Marisco

fannyanna

13Kent

I agree too Fannyanna - hence my previous post!!