DFD Coming soon....but at what cost?

RibenaBerry_2

Pink Wafer - Do look carefully at your rights in the house. The mortgage has nothing to do with it. What matters for ownership is whose name is on the title at the Land Registry, not whose name is on the mortgage. It's just that the mortgage company takes first dibs on the sale proceeds of the house (if sold) and you only get the balance.

Even if your name isn't on the title, paying into the property may still give you an entitlement to part of its value. It's not as simple as saying that you were paying rent. It's more complicated though, and you'd need a lawyer/the CAB to give you advice.

I don't want to assume that your ex-OH is trying to be mean, he might genuinely believe that it was rent and that he's being nice by paying off your debts. On the other hand, he might have an inkling of the stuff I've said above - so I'd make sure that you know where you stand before you agree to anything.

Sorry to hear about everything BTW. Hang on in there.

Valentina2

Do you have any family or friends nearby who would let you stay with them until you can find a decent place to live and, if necessary, save up for a deposit?

The_Pink_Wafer

I don't, I moved here to be with him and I have no one here.

I'm petrified to be honest.

Sammz

Am I the only one who thinks that she isn't entitled to anything to do with the house? I would also class the money she was paying as rent.

OP - I also thought I'd never manage on my own but it can work out. When I first moved in on my own (renting) I did struggle but it soon settled. Then I rented with someone (cheap) but that didn't work out so I decided to buy. It took a few months and some money on the credit card but it's settled down again.

AMILLIONDOLLARS

I would advise not to move out until you've got the money up front! Once your out of the house, the need to pay you off diminishes!!

Good luck

AMD

lynzpower

hugs to you pink wafer xxx

RibenaBerry_2

To Sammz- I agree, it might be rent. I'm just saying that it's not necessarily rent and to get all the facts before making a final decision. If her name is on the title, it's not rent. Even if it isn't, whether it was rent depends on the intention and agreement at the time the payments were made, not now.

OneSpike

Hi PW. I have no idea on the rental/mortgage thing, no experience of that, but I just wanted to send huge hugs (not going to do that weird group s*x 'hug' smiley thing, always looks very roood to me LOL!) as being dumped is the absolute pigging pits. It's happened to me a couple of times and it really feels like the end of the world. The last time it happened (6 yrs ago - I'm a happily married mum now!) things really did cave in as I had to go back to my parents' house. I couldn't support myself financially and was temping, and I really wondered how I'd let myself get to 29 and be in that position. I gave myself an extremely hard time for a while.

But, I discovered a real inner strength, cheesy though that sounds. I learnt to rely on myself and came out of the whole thing with a far greater self-respect. By a weird twist of events, a good friend of mine had just split up with his wife and we cried all over each other and a year later our daughter was on the way. We'd always been great friends but it was being there for each other when the fertilizer really hit the air-conditioning for both of us that changed the basis. Obviously I'm not predicting that exactly the same thing will happen for you, but believe me life twists in the most unpredictable ways! Well I guess you know that just now. Have heart honey, it stinks right now but after you've given yourself the time you need things will start to improve. Good idea to take some time off work. Once when I was dumped I came down with a chest infection so was forced to have a week off and I think I cried constantly, but in a funny way it did me good.

Huge hugs to you, and don't feel you have to be brave.

xx

Uniscots97

:grouphug: hugs to pink wafer. I hope it works out.

Storm

If you've paid in £5000 to the house & your debt is £1800, why don't you ask him for £2500? That way you'll have a deposit & 1st months rent ready for you to move in somewhere else.

In terms of sharing - try and take your time looking, cos there are some good places out there. One place I was in a few years ago was done so that the 2 of us living there had our own living room & just shared the kitchen & bathroom. Otherwise, you could look into getting a studio I guess

Good luck whatever you decide - you can always go take your frustrations out at the gym!