Real life MMD: Should I cough up?

budkin

Hi There
Assuming that you weren't asked before hand, and you didn't sign the card, then no you shouldnt have to cough up, especially as it was presented during your absence
i think it is a real liberty to just expect a person to chip in, just because they happen to work in the same enviroment, what if you couldn't stand that person, then what

Do the right thing and don't be pushed around !!!!:mad:

shadyv

If you really need advice on this then I would say that you shouldn't contribute otherwise you would have contributed straight away without hesitation if you didn't have a problem with it!

Not sure what relevance there is regarding it being a junior member of staff and a contractor. You're all colleagues surely? If you like someone and want to contribute do, if you don't, don't!

simples

Mrs_Arcanum

BobbinAlong wrote: »

We only collect for those leaving and have a printed list of everyone's names (except the recipient) that goes onto a big envelope and gets passed from desk to desk for you to contribute in private as much or as little as you wish and cross your name off when you've done it. Birthday cards go around the same way for signing but we don't collect money and each year we all put a pound or so into a fund for buying the cards.
Birthday person is expected to bring cakes on or close to their birthday and we all do it willingly as we all like cakes.

Same situation at every place I ever worked in (as a former temp this would be quite a few). This is a discrete way of doing things and allows people to put in whatever they can afford without finger pointing. Birthday cards are actually paid for out of petty cash.

As for the cakes I have a mad baking session a day or two before mine, where most will buy in stuff.

dandabyron

boots_babe wrote: »

If you weren't there I don't see how your contribution could be either expected or assumed :eek:

I agree completely!

SWMBO1950

I think you should just cough up but make sure you have a quiet word with the junior and say in future people should be asked before being volunteered.:T

SWMBO1950

Marco12452 wrote: »

For the sake of a fiver, not worth losing face.
Would you have given to a collection, if so then not a big difference.

I agree completely

Ebenezer_Screwj

What a cheek - on two counts ! Firstly, you were not there and not partaking in the celebration, secondly, any contribution should be voluntary and of an unspecified amount.

JayD

I would like to know what the gift was and your estimate of its value, how long the contractor has been working in your office, what the birthday was (was it a special one?) and how many others there are in your office who you would also expect to be contributing.

It is never nice to find that someone has done something on your behalf without checking with you first - especially when it involves you handing over money but as I don't have that information, I think you should pay up.

However, when you do so, you should also set clear ground rules for future 'celebratory' events and staff entitlements to them.

I suspect the junior staff member is either very chummy with the contractor, or else may have been strongly persuaded by him. It might be a good idea for you to find this out.

I hope they saved you a piece of the cake! An even bigger cheek if they didn't.

I would also like to know how the other employees felt about coughing up £5 a head on this - or are you and the junior staff member the only ones involved? As has been said by others here, £5 a head would seem pretty steep for a cake and a small gift if there are several of you.

cashead

I had a similar thing happen where I once worked. A colleague was getting married and some of the staff had been invited. One of them took it upon themselves to ask people for a £20 contribution for a joint gift! Yes, ask for contributions, but don't put a limit on it. People should give what they want, even if its a couple of pounds.
However, I also agree with most of the other posts.....birthday for a contractor? Shouldn't have got anything. However, if you agree that they should have received a gift, then what does it matter that you wasn't there? Just because you didn't get a bit of cake? Unless you didn't know about it at all. They can't inform you after the fact and expect you to pay.
And with regards to saving face......who cares? People spend far too much time keeping the peace and thinking about what others will think of them. What will you think of yourself if you go against what you believe just so as to save face? Thats what matters. If others don't like it, let them pay for you.

Bushey

Unless agreed beforehand that collections take place on Birthdays ( contractors included) and that £5 is the norm then cough up.
If you dont want to contribute just say, no one is forcing you. however as mentioned what did the contractor recieve and is the £5 a fair amount for a portion of the gift value.

In future Set the record straight in the office, we had a set of rules.
Only those names on the birthday list we held either contributed or recieved.
In fact when it was someones birthday THEY brought in the cakes etc, if they were on the list and forgot they were promptly reminded. anyone not wanting to be on the list were told to keep there hands off the birthday cakes brought in, and woe betide them:mad: if they helped themselves as some selfish tight asses did.