Why dont bad days stop at 'days'.....

aliasojo

....instead of carrying on to be bad weeks or months?!

I've lost several items over the last few weeks/months. Engagement ring, bank card, letter with new credit card still attached to it and a t-shirt.

I've turned the house upside down looking for these things, to no avail. I had to cancel the bank card and got a new one sent, the credit card was never activated so no big deal. I assumed I had simply misplaced the ring and t-shirt too and they would turn up again so I wasn't too concerned, up until around a week ago.

I've started going to the gym a lot and I bought 2 tops and 2 leggings as sportswear. The t-shirt that went missing was one of these tops. I didn't want to buy a replacement as I was hoping I'd be a smaller size soon and it seemed a waste of money, so I was wearing the same outfit and just constantly washed and re-wore it. Last week I decided to hunt for the missing t-shirt again and gutted the house in the process, I even went up into the loft in case it had got caught up with other stuff. I went through all the wardrobes of everyone in here and still didn't find it. (Edit: only wardrobes in house at present are in my room and son's room.)

Two days ago, the bank card that went missing (and is now cancelled anyway so is of no use anymore) appeared on a shelf beside the computer. Everyone in here denies knowing anything about it and at the time I thought it a bit weird but let it go. This morning, my missing t-shirt appears draped over a clothes rack. Everyone denies all knowledge.

I've pointed out I don't find this particularly funny, especially given the items that went missing were really needed and weren't just incidentals, but everyone is promising me faithfully *insert rolling eyes smillie since clearly one of them is lying* that they don't know anything about it.

I have to admit to getting a bit upset at this point the bank card and t-shirt were spoken about frequently as I really needed them so I thought it was more cruel than funny for someone to have taken them, hide them for a few weeks and then magically make them re-appear. I spend my sodding life sorting things out for others and I was upset that one of mine could do this tbh.

Obviously one of them has done it but I have no way of finding out which one and I'm sat here looking at them all thinking how easily trust gets broken.

*sigh* I'm really looking forward to the time where I just sit in a chair in an old folk's home gazing out the window.

And my engagement ring and credit card still haven't turned up.

pigpen

On the bright side.. it isn't people you have lost.. they were only 'things' and I know the engagement ring means a lot sentimentally but they are only 'things' still.. everyone is healthy and well and I have had a really $h!tty 3 years and if the worst of my worries was a lost ring and credit card I'd be a happy happy bunny.

It is possible they didn't know which tshirt you were on about.. and the letter on a bookshelf could easily have been between a couple of books and moved when someone has moved a book. Whoever else the tshirt might fit is the culprit.. they have worn it, or it might have been washed and put in their cupboard accidentally and they just got it out of their drawer and threw it on the airer knowing whoever it belonged to would claim it eventually.. it has probably been under a pile of other detritus in a drawers since it went astray.

My lost black cardy turned up after 6 months in DD1's cupbaord.. she thought it was hers... took it off the airer and left it in her drawer.. until I had a fling and threw out her stuff and found it hidin in there.. gggrrr

aliasojo

pigpen wrote: »

It is possible they didn't know which tshirt you were on about.. and the letter on a bookshelf could easily have been between a couple of books and moved when someone has moved a book. Whoever else the tshirt might fit is the culprit.. they have worn it, or it might have been washed and put in their cupboard accidentally and they just got it out of their drawer and threw it on the airer knowing whoever it belonged to would claim it eventually.. it has probably been under a pile of other detritus in a drawers since it went astray.

They knew which t-shirt and it wasn't a letter on a bookshelf. The bank card appeared on a shelf. There is nothing else on this shelf other than the pc monitor so not as if it has fallen etc, it has been placed there by someone. So why cant that someone just say so?

I went through everyone's wardrobes and ironing baskets. If the t-shirt was innocently caught up, I'd have found it then.

I see you your 3 years and raise you at least 8.


Edit: Just to emphasise....there is no way these things 'accidentally' disappeared or 'accidentally' re-appeared. They were moved/taken then physically replaced, in the case of the t-shirt, someone did that this morning, so why not say 'look mum, found your t-shirt' instead of everyone denying they'd seen it? it never got there by itself.

poet123

Maybe they were doing what I do occasionally when I have asserted quite categorically that I have not moved xyz, only to find it somewhere, where it is clear even to me, and despite me wanting it to be otherwise, that only I would have/could have put it there.:o

At that point I have been known to "save face" by putting in a place it will be easily discovered but will not immediately point to me as the culprit:o

My rationale is that if I admitted guilt on those rare occasions when I am guilty, they would not believe I wasn't guilty on all the others when I am innocent, and it is their carelessness which has caused the item to be missing.

This admission will self delete after a few minutes!!

aliasojo

poet123 wrote: »

Maybe they were doing what I do occasionally when I have asserted quite categorically that I have not moved xyz, only to find it somewhere, where it is clear even to me, and despite me wanting it to be otherwise, that only I would have/could have put it there.:o

At that point I have been known to "save face" by putting in a place it will be easily discovered but will not immediately point to me as the culprit:o

My rationale is that if I admitted guilt on those rare occasions when I am guilty, they would not believe I wasn't guilty on all the others when I am innocent, and it is their carelessness which has caused the item to be missing.

This admission will self delete after a few minutes!!

No it wont. :rotfl:

Edit: Your 'misplacing things issue' (trying to be kind there ) is genuinely accidental, there is no malice involved. With my issue, I do actually believe the taking and then replacing is deliberate, that's why I am so bugged by it.

poet123

In this house someone will ask me "have you seen my blue t shirt", assuming that this t shirt means as much to me as it does to them, and that I have all their clothes mentally filed away, and that my inner sat nav can instantly locate any article. Bear in mind there are six of us here, five of whom have at least one, if not more, blue t shirts.....Is it any wonder I sometimes stray from the straight and narrow? and feel no guilt for it.

poet123

aliasojo wrote: »

No it wont. :rotfl:

Edit: Your 'misplacing things issue' (trying to be kind there ) is genuinely accidental, there is no malice involved. With my issue, I do actually believe the taking and then replacing is deliberate, that's why I am so bugged by it.

Ah, I see, I feel a family meeting is called for and for you to "suggest":D that you know who is responsible but will give the culprit one last opportunity to confess before you take "further steps".....it always unnerves my lot;)

January20

Very childish I know, but why don't you give them each a taste of their own medicine? There must be an item that is dear to each of them and could "disappear" for a few weeks and then magically reappear?

Do you think it was malicious ie to annoy you or do you think it was just a very strange sense of humour?

belfastgirl23

Do you really have no clue who it is?? or is there anyone you can rule out?? Sounds quite upsetting to me.

aliasojo

belfastgirl23 wrote: »

Sounds quite upsetting to me.

That's what I felt. :undecided

I know it all sounds quite amusing at first but you would need to have been here to understand the issues related to all this first hand before you'd fully understand what's being going on here over the last wee while.

I don't think it's the youngest, she's only 11 and isn't devious by nature and she would have piped up immediately if she'd found either the bank card or t-shirt. That only leaves OH or eldest son. I'm finding it hard to believe it's either of them but clearly it's one of them.

The most obvious would be my eldest.

January20 wrote: »

Do you think it was malicious ie to annoy you or do you think it was just a very strange sense of humour?

I really don't know. I didn't think any of them would do something like this for any reason so shows what I know. If it was just one item, then maybe it was a prank that got out of hand the longer it went on, but the fact that several items were involved makes me question that theory.

They are all as adament as each other that they had nothing to do with it and they are all as equally believeable.

poet123

aliasojo wrote: »

That's what I felt. :undecided

I know it all sounds quite amusing at first but you would need to have been here to understand the issues related to all this first hand before you'd fully understand what's being going on here over the last wee while.

I don't think it's the youngest, she's only 11 and isn't devious by nature and she would have piped up immediately if she'd found either the bank card or t-shirt. That only leaves OH or eldest son. I'm finding it hard to believe it's either of them but clearly it's one of them.

The most obvious would be my eldest.



I really don't know. I didn't think any of them would do something like this for any reason so shows what I know. If it was just one item, then maybe it was a prank that got out of hand the longer it went on, but the fact that several items were involved makes me question that theory.

They are all as adament as each other that they had nothing to do with it and they are all as equally believeable.

Sorry:o I didn't mean to make light of an issue that is clearly and rightly, causing you upset. Difficult to know how to play this one, but I would go on gut feeling, who do you really see doing this, and why? decide on that, and return the compliment.

Then, when it all kicks off re the missing item, a frank exchange of views is in order, and the underlying issues need airing.