So hard to manage.......

joeblack066

DD (13) was rushed into hosp Thursday with suspected appendicitis, confirmed and operated Fri, 3 hrs innsurgery, phenomenal mess on her abdomen, now successfully resolved by fantastic surgeon. I have been with her throughout, so am now on day 5 of being totally wrong about everything, knowing nothing as an adult, and generally being sniped at. She is in a lot of post op pain (mainly gas and nausea), and won't est, won't mobilise, won't drink, and just has a go at me every time I try to encourage her, lying there say Owwwww. I love her so much but am at my wits end. Any advice anyone?

faithcecilia

Is she still in hospital? If so point out they won't let her home until she is up and about (thats what got me moving after my appendectomy!). Also, was it her first anasthetic? From my experience and that of friends, whatever procedure is your first anasthetic is most horrific - I was far worse after my appendix than I was after 2 much bigger operations later, and I sailed through my tonsilectomy while a friend who had had no other surgery was ill for quite some time.

Is there someone else who could give you a little time on your own? If so you might feel better after a long bath, decent meal, etc.

I hope she feels better soon and gets back to her normal self.

ddebski_us

joeblack066 wrote: »

DD (13) was rushed into hosp Thursday with suspected appendicitis, confirmed and operated Fri, 3 hrs innsurgery, phenomenal mess on her abdomen, now successfully resolved by fantastic surgeon. I have been with her throughout, so am now on day 5 of being totally wrong about everything, knowing nothing as an adult, and generally being sniped at. She is in a lot of post op pain (mainly gas and nausea), and won't est, won't mobilise, won't drink, and just has a go at me every time I try to encourage her, lying there say Owwwww. I love her so much but am at my wits end. Any advice anyone?

Aww bless her. What a scary time for her. Just be there for her, help her out and give her lots of love etc. Appendicitus is painful; I had it when I was 10 and remember just laying in bed, feeling scared.

Get her some books/magazines, let her slob around watching the telly. Soon enough, the pain will subside and she'll start feeling better.

Good luck.

xDx

Nicki

Peppermint oil capsules are great for post op gas pains.

Otherwise, you probably have to grit your teeth and bear it! Hope she feels better soon.

Counting_Pennies_2

I think she is of an age for tough love.

Say to her you love her very much and know she is in so much pain. But nothing can be resolved by sniping at you. That you are happy to do whatever it takes to make her comfortable and better, but that you will be better off friends to get through it.

Then do something really lovely for her that she really likes. Is she in a position to have her nails painted yet? Ask the nurse, they might still need to be kept clear.

Get her favourite magazines, or whatever it is that is her favourite food, etc.

To get rid of the gas ask the nurse if they can prescribe some of the peppermint medicine. You can only get it in hospital pharmacies (tried to get a prescription when I got out and it is hospital only), it works wonders on settling the stomach and getting rid of the wind. It will be given to her in a little medicine cup. It is nothing like peppermint tea, it is so powerful.

Maybe see if you can also get some peppermint tea, peppermint sweets.

What medicine is she on? If it is codene, she will need some form of laxative as it bungs her up, is she getting that?

Do also remember to manage her medicine. In order to stay out of pain she will need to take her medicines on the dot. When the pain starts to kick in it takes a long time to get rid of it again.

It is tough having an op on the stomach, as an adult over the last 7 years I have had 3 and it is miserable. You will need to stick it out I am afraid.

Lots of walking about. Give her an incentive. Walk xxx and I will give you xxx.

hth

Amanda65

You have my sympathy - my DS aged 14 had exactly the same 4 weeks ago on Friday.

Part of the problem for me was that I felt so emotionally drained after the whole thing I ran around like a headless chicken trying to make it up to him. Couple this with an emotionally charged, hormone fuelled teen who probably is generally moody anyway and your feeling of guilt for your baby having to go through surgery (even thoguh it's not your fault) and you have a time bomb ticking away

DS was discharged less that 12 hours after he came out of surgery (I collected him from the recovery room at 11pm on Friday evening and by 10am on Saturday morning he was home) so I was also quite 'tough', (having had a caesarean when I had DS felt it was payback :rotfl::rotfl:) and 'made' him get up and walk around every 20 mins or so, only little circuits round the living room as I know from experience regaining mobility, and having the confidence to walk / stand upright without worrying that your stomach will split open, is key to recovery.

DS was on ibuprofen and paracetomol for 3 days, which I gave alternately every 2 hours (so each med was 4 hours apart) and meant that he never got into too much pain. Chocolate, lots of fluids, smoothies and food little and often soon saw his appetite return and he now cannot wait to get back to playing footbal although still has another 2 weeks to go before he can start up again.

Hold in there, use a bit of tough love combined with encouragement and invite her friends round to see her - it's amazing how much more mobile they become with their peer group in attendance

joeblack066

Amanda, was this keyhole or open surgery? DD had open surgery, real bad case apparently?

No one has mentioned before that codeine cnstipates them, or any peppermint medicine? Why do I have to keep asking for everything?? She was throwing up after every meds and eventually I had to point out that she was retaining zero pain meds, and could they please IVsome?? After much rolling of eyes it came. It's just all addng to the stress.

euronorris

Must be tough on both on you, but....I'd be tempted to say 'If you've got the energy to snipe at me every 2 mins, then you've got the energy to get up and walk around a bit.' and then don't back down. Only cos that is exactly what my Mum would've said to me. lol

I hope she recovers quickly and that you get some rest too!

x

pigpen

Ooh i'd not be able to keep my mouth shut.. you deserve a medal.

I'd say 'fine, lay there whining.. I'm going for coffee and cake... if you want some you best shift yourself.. you've got your phone text or ring when you want me to come back. You are fine.. they have people up and about within a day or so of a hysterectomy'.. plus I've had 4 sections and major reconstructive surgery following a perforated bowel and was on my feet within hours each time.

I had peppermint oil after one surgery.. then spent 3 days on the loo in even worse pain.. the stomach cramps I got with that were worse than the trapped wind. Moving does shift the air naturally.

Go home, the staff won't eat her if you're not there.. get a nice long bath and a proper meal and ring the ward if you want to see what she's at.. She may just be enjoying the attention take that away and she has to move.

Amanda65

joeblack066 wrote: »

Amanda, was this keyhole or open surgery? DD had open surgery, real bad case apparently?
.

Now this is going to sound really stupid - but I don't know . He has a horizontal scar about 7cm long on his right side so I want to say open as I presume with keyhole he would have just had a small, well, keyhole ? But I don't really know. He had an inflamed appendix rather than full blown appendicitis - thanks to an excellent judgement by my GP on the Friday morning who decided that we would be there at some point over the weekend so she would refer us to the surgical team sooner rather than later - so not sure if that made a difference ?

euronorris

Amanda, sounds like open surgery to me, but I'm no expert. Still holding onto my appendix as tightly as possible, even though it does like a 'grumble' every now and then.