Weekly Flylady Thread 28th February 2011

vanilla

sockdrawer wrote: »

Gah! Vanilla You totally have played everything by the book. Are you guys totally stuck with that school? (I seem to remember there were travel issues. but I might be wrong...?) Have you completely lost the opportunity to move her to another school? This is unacceptable behaviour! (I'm cross for you) That type of bullying can hurt you for life. (My mum was the mum in the wheelchair-MS when MS was something you could "rise above" and wasn't a proper illness- and I got bullied by both teachers and pupils because of it... and it took a while to get over!) So sorry she (and you) are going through the mill atm.
ETA- You're far from stupid! You went with what was suggested and it sounded good at the time. Up to them to uphold their end of the deal IMO x

We're not stuck with it as such, the other school would be a nightmare to get to in the winter but i could go a longer safer way. The other school is willing to take them and have said if i change my mind just phone them but i have inquired 2 times before so sort of feel like an a** that i keep changing my mind and it is a damn good school. I honestly can't see this changing for DD, this year 4 of the gits will leave but it still leaves 2 there for next year and they will involve more kids.

The boys end up dragged into it too. DS1 (age 7) got his arm twisted up his back by the boy (age 11) who shouted in DD's ears. This was on friday and DD told the teacher on Monday when the same boy was trying to trip her and take her recorder. The teacher told her she was wrong and wasn't in his room on friday, which is funny because i was standing at the back door and seen her in there. :mad: She does what she's told to do, tell a teacher and they tell her she lying or it's all in her head or they will sort it out (which they never do). I'm just so cross..

pigpen

melody69 wrote: »

Hm - do they have them in Lakeland??!

How should I know? Do I look like a domestic doggess goddess??

Picture a scruff.. in a squashed frog green dead jumper, leggings with mug rings on the thigh.. shows how much tea I drink and how much time I spend on the sofa.. hair was last brushed... Sunday I think.. socks on their third wearing (I only wear them a couple of hours when heating is off) surrounded by a visual cacophony of mess.. and a pile of dirty baby clothes at her feet... complete with nappy it seems.....

That would.... be me.. lol...

TBF I am tired.. really tired *yawns to illustrate point*

Vanilla... just move them... DD has played their game, you've played their game.. either get the police involved or move them.. or both.. it is not a safe environment for any of your children get the poor loves out of there. I spent 8 years rain and snow and hail and shine trailing 45 minutes to school.. and back.. 3 times a day so the children didn't have to go to a crappy local school.. it is hard work and so tiring but you know in your heart it is the best decision for the children.

xx_Jo_xx

Decluttered LR coffee table, detrius and toys from floor back into wicker basket, decluttered one or two to the bin since no one was looking.

Dusted and dewebbed LR

Decluttered hall at bottom of stairs

sorted LO school uniform for tomorrow - he can do his own football kit in the morning.

Hmmmm, cant remember what else I did but it seemed like more - maybe just wishful thinking :rotfl:

ETA - dusted CD Unit and bookcase in DR, rehung all coats, shoes and bags, fitted new battery in the smoke alarm

sockdrawer

vanilla wrote: »

We're not stuck with it as such, the other school would be a nightmare to get to in the winter but i could go a longer safer way. The other school is willing to take them and have said if i change my mind just phone them but i have inquired 2 times before so sort of feel like an a** that i keep changing my mind and it is a damn good school. I honestly can't see this changing for DD, this year 4 of the gits will leave but it still leaves 2 there for next year and they will involve more kids.

The boys end up dragged into it too. DS1 (age 7) got his arm twisted up his back by the boy (age 11) who shouted in DD's ears. This was on friday and DD told the teacher on Monday when the same boy was trying to trip her and take her recorder. The teacher told her she was wrong and wasn't in his room on friday, which is funny because i was standing at the back door and seen her in there. :mad: She does what she's told to do, tell a teacher and they tell her she lying or it's all in her head or they will sort it out (which they never do). I'm just so cross..

Ok, TBH, I would write to the director of education (often more helpful than you might think) at the local authority, rather than dealing with the school any further. (hopefully with copies of any complaints made previously?)
I would set down why you want the move, mention any special needs, how they are not being addressed, how she is being bullied, and how they could be addressed by the local authority/and/or/ at the new school. Then I'd ask for school transport to the new school. It is everyone's responsibility to ensure the safety of children, and they should be aware of this.
I would also point out why I had refused the offer of the new school, (because you were being reasonable, and trying to go along with their offers of help.) however this has not worked out.
I home educated for years and have known parents take their children out of school to HE for less excuse than that.

onestep

pigpen wrote: »

Vanilla... just move them... DD has played their game, you've played their game.. either get the police involved or move them.. or both.. it is not a safe environment for any of your children get the poor loves out of there. I spent 8 years rain and snow and hail and shine trailing 45 minutes to school.. and back.. 3 times a day so the children didn't have to go to a crappy local school.. it is hard work and so tiring but you know in your heart it is the best decision for the children.

^^^^^ what she said ^^^^^ It's got to be the right thing to do, and frankly, do you really care if they think you're a neurotic mum at the new school? What they will be thinking is that you're a protective mum, who tried very very hard to keep her children's schooling consistent, but was forced to remove her children from a completely disruptive and harmful environment. Might not know you in RL, vanilla, but from here it looks like you are doing an amazing job with very little support from all the places you should be getting support. Do you do hugs? Have a big one (((HUG)))

melody69

pigpen wrote: »

How should I know? Do I look like a domestic doggess goddess??

Picture a scruff.. in a squashed frog green dead jumper, leggings with mug rings on the thigh.. shows how much tea I drink and how much time I spend on the sofa.. hair was last brushed... Sunday I think.. socks on their third wearing (I only wear them a couple of hours when heating is off) surrounded by a visual cacophony of mess.. and a pile of dirty baby clothes at her feet... complete with nappy it seems.....

That would.... be me.. lol...

Ha - you think you look bad? I've had my head in the oven and in various other greasy cupboards for what feels like most of the day. And due to lovely chemical cleaning materials (gross oven cleaner mostly) I now have hands that would pass for pieces of sandpaper. That doesn't do anything for your looks let me tell you... :eek:

MrsChaos

(((Hugs))), vanilla. You really have more than enough to contend with at the moment. I'm with the others - I think it's time for a move.

I'm off to bed in a minute in the hope that I can make an early start if I get a good night's sleep. I've decided that I can't keep burning the candle at both ends.
WM, TD, DW all sorted. Kitchen tidied up after tea (HM chicken noodle soup from yesterday's stock - yum) and LR hoovered, so I'm keeping on top of dailies and cleaned/cleared spots are staying clean and clear. I just can't seem to sort more dots to join.
OK, time to make a cup of tea and put the washing on the airer. Then bed to do food diary and to-do list, followed by 3 or 4 pages of my book and lights out asap.

Little Cat is still as hungry as ever, despite worming.
Good night all. x

life_in_termoil

You need to write to the headmaster of the school, the school governor chairman, Education committee and the school welfare officer and ask them all to arrange a meeting, give a brief outline of problems but dont go into too much detail. Give them a time scale of about a fortnight. In the meantime start gathering together your evidence so you are well prepared and dont whatever you do let them fob you off!! You will probably find they are reluctant to meet all together but if this is the case arrange meetings individually. Dont give up!!!

Good luck x

ETA Failing all that threaten to take them out of school and home school them yourself as that usually gets a very quick response!!!

happierdaystocome

Vanilla from what you have said it seem like your DD is getting a raw deal from teaching staff and pupils alike. I agree with others either contact the police or change schools, it sounds like you be reasonable enough for far to long.

Looby-Lou, congrats on the new job hun, I hope it works out for you.

Pigpen- Well at least you managed to get dressed today, Im still in my PJ's

There was others I wanted to respond to but have the memory of a goldfish at the moment and feel lucky when I remember my own name,lol. well done to those who's LO's got into their school of choice and (((((hugs))) for those who need them.

Any way on the flying front, I've made dinner and S&S kitchen, clean the bathroom, as well as completed todays list

pigpen

I had to be dressed to collect grubs from school.. other than that I went to bed in a vest top and some pants, as well as scaring small children I would have been chilly.. I had to put something on.. and my squashed frog green dead jumper also has a shiny coating of thick slimy green mucus from a certain small snotmonster!