Looking after disabled child part-time..

giz1972

My brother-in-law is in the following situation.

My brother-in-law's partner (ex) walked out on him about a year or so ago, taking their near 4 year old child with her. He as always always had his son weekends and holidays and does his best in his financial situation. Normal stay would be Friday after school and pick up Monday for school.

He lost his job shortly before the split and is currently still living on JSA (about £65 A WEEK), he gets his ct and rent paid for now, since his job loss. He really does struggle to find work that will take into account that he has a disabled child and in one given moment, his ex partner will turn up and leave the child with him so she can go off with her new (6 months) boyfriend. She leaves him with no nappies, wipes....nothing, not even a coat. He then gets a telling off from the school pick up bus carers for not having appropriate clothing etc...

From what he tells me, she claims one parent, Income support, child tax credits, child benefits, high rate disability allowances and high rate carers allowance and anything else she can get her hands on. She even claims for a council rented property (and ctax), which i believe is now just used as a postal drop off as she is living with her new partner.

He knows if he causes a fuss and asks for some help in the form of nappies etc... from her, that she will stop access for a while as punishment, then because she wants her space from the child she will let him have the child again.

My question is........Now surely there is some kind of help or benefits for my brother-in-law, as he as his child for a good amount of time. He can't ask her for a share of anything but he can't go on coping on just jsa. All serious answers will help him.

cassieB57

no because he is not the 'primary carer'; however if he is certain about her getting IS while living with a partner, he could mention to her that he knows he should report her for this, this might be enough of an incentive for her to be a little more compliant (then report her anyway for benefit fraud)

Graham29

Surely the money she gets for helping with his disabilities should be shared in accordance to how many nights Dad has him and how many nights Mum has him?

JC9297

Graham29 wrote: »

Surely the money she gets for helping with his disabilities should be shared in accordance to how many nights Dad has him and how many nights Mum has him?

This is probably what many decent, fair people would do but she has no obligation to give him any of the benefit she receives as the child's primary carer.

Graham29

JC9297 wrote: »

This is probably what many decent, fair people would do but she has no obligation to give him any of the benefit she receives as the child's primary carer.

I know how silly of me to expect people to put their child first, instead of their own pocket.

JC9297

Although actually the DLA isn't hers it is the child's, so in theory a proportion of that should go with the child when he is with his dad.

giz1972

He had no money for nappies last week, she gave him 60p.
I can't tell you how i feel when he tells me the things about her, it's all true as well, he showed me her facebook, it's her life story.
She's even started to put his child in a different rival football kit (new fella's team).lol.

On a serious note, I really would like to shop her myself, when i speak to him next, i'm going to suggest following the bus where the school takes his child too after he finishes.
Can he claim income support instead of jsa because he cares for his child?

please please more info anyone!!!

karenx

Income support is for the single parent who is the primary carer. Both parents cannot claim this.

calleyw

giz1972 wrote: »

Can he claim income support instead of jsa because he cares for his child?

please please more info anyone!!!

If the child is getting middle rate care(DLA) he could claim carers allowance if he is caring more than 35 hours a week everyweek.

But if the mother is claiming then I don't believe he can. He does not seem to have set times when he has the child and he is not the primary carer.

Which makes everything difficult.

If you BIL is that concerned for his own childs welfare then why not try to get custody of the child.

Your

Calley

giz1972

Theres no reason for concern with the childs welfare, she looks after the child very well and activities are plentyful, It's just a shame that my BIL cannot do the things he would like to do on such limited funds. It's ok saying get a job but soon as you mention your responsibilities, work places put you at the bottom of the list. She lives on the fat of the land and he as to scrap by, pardon the pun.

giz1972

Is anyone else in the same situation, with part time care of a disabled child? even a grandparent who may know of any help.