Am I being unfair?

Tish_P

Say you can't go because you are too busy, which is true. I agree with andrealm - if she's scared to travel to London she shouldn't be applying for jobs there. But ask if there are other ways you can help her - send a good luck card and a London guidebook, help her book her tickets, give her a mock interview over the phone or something. If she's genuinely nervous things like that will help a lot.

GEEGEE8

Don't go, and don't be made to feel guilty.

I couldn't do my uni work without being relaxed and in a comfortable environment at home. I can't concentrate in the library even.

I don't see why you have to go, and like others have said, how does she expect to work there if she can't even go there on her own?

onlyroz

If someone *must* go with her (and I don't really see why she can't go on her own) then why can't it be your mum?

barbiedoll

No, you shouldn't feel guilty if you can't/don't want to go. She's officially an adult but she still pulls the "little sister" card when she wants something! Don't worry about the tears and tantrums, it's just tough luck for her, she will have to sort out something else.

There's no reason why you should be at her beck and call so, be strong, tell your mum that you are too busy to go and that's the end of it as far as you're concerned. They will soon get over it.

(You should tell sis that as she cannot be trusted to behave like an adult, you don't particularly want to spend any more time with her than you absolutely have to..........see if you get an apology for the NYE slap then!)

Counting_Pennies_2

What is your mum doing?

Surely if she is putting up the cash, she could go. It would be a nice bonding exercise for the two of them

pigpen

victor2 wrote: »

If she can't even apologise for her drunken behaviour, she's on her own. Why can't her Mum go with her? Too busy, can't leave rest of family behind?

Exactly.. if your mum can afford to pay for you to go she could go herself and you get to stay home.. your dissertaion is really important and they should be supporting you

BitterAndTwisted

Coo, family blackmail can be an ugly thing, can't it? I can't think of one good reason why you should have to explain yourself. In fact, it's sometimes better not to so then the other parties can't spend endless amounts of time and energy trying to talk you round. And then you end up feeling like a hard-faced, uncooperative b!atch and very possibly being called one as well.

donquine

There are times when you need to put yourself last and move heaven and earth to help out family. But this doesn't sound like one of them.

I think you should explain how busy you are with your studies and how important they are to you at this stage (what would getting a poor mark really mean and do your sister and mum understand that?), but offer to practise some interview questions with your sister over the phone, to help her prepare. After all, the more prepared you are for an interview, the calmer you are and the less you feel like you need someone to hold your hand on the day!

There's clearly an age gap between you and your sister and you think she's immature, but a better job in the big smoke might help her grow up a bit, so forgive and forget her past behaviour and support her in her efforts as much as you are able to. Going to London with her isn't necessary, but a bit of long distance moral support wouldn't go amiss.

Mk14:37

By the age of 18 I had travelled up and down the country to University open days - Nottingham, Newcastle, Preston, Leeds, Belfast, Durham, always alone, and then went off and lived in rural Japan for 10 months.

As everyone is saying, your sister needs to get her act together. Presumably you won't be walking her to work every morning, if she gets the job?

January20

charlie792 wrote: »

I and its not like I don't have my own life here, someone needs to make lunch, cook dinner, do the washing and Im sure OH won't like me suddenly disappearing and leaving him to it...

I have 2 unhappy family members now or an unhappy OH and I don't know what to do!

Oh and just to note this is the first time my sister has even bothered speaking to me since new year where she got stupidly drunk acted like moo and slapped me one....an apology wouldn't have gone far amiss

If you don't want to go, don't go but don't use poor excuses like the one above! Can't your OH cope without you for a couple of days? Can't he make his own lunch or his own dinner for that length of time? How very sad if that is the case!