Csa?

naughtyjo

Try not to dwell on it. I seperated from my partner whilst pregant and My son is 16 and in all that time I have received £33 for about 10 weeks so about £330 in total.
The reason been despite my son been the 1st born child my ex married and went on to have 3 kids with wife. He earned excellent money about £60k/yr plus wifes wage yet he has not had to pay a penny because of housing costs and child costs for his other 3.
I could close my claim because it was back in 1994 and reopen one which under new regs he would receive no housing allowance so would probably have to pay me quite a lot.
However the way I see it is this
I am more than able to support my son myself. I dont think its healthy to be resentful about stuff. Hes the one that fibbed and ducked and dived and for what? I'm sure that if in the future my son decides to see him he will have to answer for his actions.
Secondly I dont want his other kids to suffer or for his marriage to be under strain because of a relationship that didnt work out through neither of our faults.
Lifes too short and you are getting a regular weekly amount from him which to be fair is more than most women get. You must remember that you also have a responsibility to support your own child so play fair and if you feel its not enough could he help in other ways? (ie) opening a savings account or giving you extra cash at christmas and birthdays? buying clothing etc. Try and keep it amicable because you will always have to tolerate one another for your childs sake.

kelloggs36

But he has a moral responsibility to pay towards his own child - you have effectively let him off his responsibility - personally I would not be so generous. It is one thing to want to walk away and not have anything to do with the child, but to not take on responsibility is quite another.

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

The 15% rule doesnt happen for every one though. My OH doesnt get a 15% deduction from his payments for his son and he lives with me and DD (we've asked CSA to look into this)

I honestly dont think there should be a 15% deduction on any payments. Each kid starts off with a mum and a dad and that mum and dad should be reponsible. My OH does contriubte towards my DD, but he shouldnt HAVE to - Her dad should pull his finger out

Ex's maintainence payments do go straight into DD's bank account, so he isnt making me short etc - I have a good job anyway

He gave her £7 at xmas. For her Birthday this year i'm taking the family away on holiday, have asked her dad to buy her some holiday clothes but he wont.

His GF pulls his strings - he doesnt see DD because GF wont allow it (whole other thread on here about it)

I agreed DD could sleep over at his one night last year (this was last time he saw her) and he was going to let her sleep on the floor

The main reason im upset is because my DD deserves her dad to contribute towards her, its up to her what she does with her money when shes older but he should have an active role in her up bringing and should not be skirting out of it. It isnt my fault the GF doesnt get money from her ex - she should of gone down the CSA route like me

daddie

I am going through the exact same problem with csa. They are not interested that my ex partner has an income far greater than mine. I could go on but my point is Ive spoken to csa today due to starting a new job of 16hrs and they informed me that they will need to know all my income. I told them that I will get my wage, wtc and ctc. They told me they will count the ctc so I went mad on the phone. That money is for my daughter (who lives with me) and it should not be deducted to give to my ex especially when she already claims it for my son (who lives with her). I think I may have found a loophole though as I asked the csa do they take into account what my partner (who I live with) earns or claims? They said NO. So I then asked them what would they base their calculations on if I was to let my partner claim the ctc in her name and my income would be a wage and wt? They told me they would then work it out on just my income which wouldnt include ctc as I wouldnt be claiming it. I hope this may be of some use to someone.

kelloggs36

But you are claiming it as it it a JOINT claim - you can't have single claims for tax credits as it is worked out on household income. Child Tax credits are ALWAYS counted as NRP income, Working Tax credits depend on who earns the most. Maybe the person you spoke to thought you would not be a household, but there is no loophole.

brians_daughter

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel wrote: »

Ex's over time is gauranteed. he's worked for the company for 5 years and lowest he's ever brought home is £24k (his wages at the time was £15k basic, rest was OT)

Whilst that may have been the case in the past we have undergone/are going through tough ecomonic times. My oh has worked for his company 10 years and always had the option to work as much OT as he can manage, he works in what is meant to be a recession proof industry.. but he has had no OT in over 7 months.

Now, i am not saying this is the case for you as i too am a PWC and know the lengths my ex goes to to not contribute....his partner doesnt work they have 3 children.. have just come back from disney world on a 3 week holiday and him and his oh are off to the Dominican for 2 weeks in a month but my son gets £14 per week from his earnings..

I know there is something fishy going on somewhere as no one can afford on his wage what he is doing/driving/living but i am at the point now where its just too much stress/hassle/upset to persue it.

£14 covers my sons football and swimming activities and leaves him with £3 pocket money at the end of it. I have more about me, and not enough time to spend trying to unravel how hes getting away with it.. Over time it will drag you down, trust me - i have been there.

[Deleted User]

daddie wrote: »

I am going through the exact same problem with csa. They are not interested that my ex partner has an income far greater than mine. I could go on but my point is Ive spoken to csa today due to starting a new job of 16hrs and they informed me that they will need to know all my income. I told them that I will get my wage, wtc and ctc. They told me they will count the ctc so I went mad on the phone. That money is for my daughter (who lives with me) and it should not be deducted to give to my ex especially when she already claims it for my son (who lives with her). I think I may have found a loophole though as I asked the csa do they take into account what my partner (who I live with) earns or claims? They said NO. So I then asked them what would they base their calculations on if I was to let my partner claim the ctc in her name and my income would be a wage and wt? They told me they would then work it out on just my income which wouldnt include ctc as I wouldnt be claiming it. I hope this may be of some use to someone.

As much as its annoyed me with my OH's claim Kelloggs is right, the form they sent my OH only asked for WTC, I phoned to check after Kelloggs said the CTC should be included, they did tell me on 2 occasions that they only wanted the WTC but I was dreading the fact that they would be back in touch later and say it was wrong and backdate it so I phoned a third time and this time they have confirmed that the CTC should be getting included in the assessment....sure its not fair that its used when the PWC gets child tax credits for their child but the whole way the CSA works isn't fair on a lot of things, they should just take the wage and I agree the WTC and then take the same 15% for each child the NRP has regardless of who they live with...eg not 15% for our son first and then 15% from whats left it should be 15% from the total and give that to both....

Anyway thanks Kelloggs your insistance made me question them and I'm glad now! Seems the CSA have some training to do.lol

Mimi_Arc_en_ciel

brians_daughter wrote: »

Whilst that may have been the case in the past we have undergone/are going through tough ecomonic times.

It's definatley still the same - Ex was stupid enough to tell me and people he works will slip up occassionally and tell me how tired Ex is because he's got XX OT this month.

Texted Ex today - for some stupid reason his birthday cards have been sent to my address. He hasnt replied.

Dont know if i should send them on (but dont know where he lives), make him pick them up (doubtful) or bin them