grandparents getting involved

moggylover

It's really hard to make sound judgements because we know so few details of exactly what has gone on.

Personally, I would be really happy for my sons to have a family member they felt they could trust enough to talk to if it was something they were struggling to work out with me.

Can you try to stand back and see that it would have been difficult for your mother to turn her grandson away when he had rung to talk it through with her? Can you also perhaps see that even if she said something that was critical of you it might possibly have been "true", even if you don't feel up to admitting that at the moment?

I can remember once being horribly annoyed with my mum for telling a boyfriend of mine that I was a "stubborn cow" when annoyed, but that I would think it through from both sides once I had calmed down. At the time it felt like an unfair criticism when things were already difficult: in retrospect she was spot on right (:o:o).

As to being criticised by your off-spring: I suspect that is in the job description:) Certainly every youngster I know has at least some criticism of their parents (mine included) and some will be justified, others won't, but they are a part of growing up and becoming your own person.