Do you worry about what people think of think of you?

nomuny

I try not to worry but lately I have started to re-think what I've said when I've met people and often think to myself oh no I must have seemed a right t**t - my confidence has taken a knock lately and this is the result I think - but I do sound like those on here with this so maybe it goes deeper and its some sort of depression. It doesn't stop me talking to people or being friendly Ijust sometimes cringe to myself after.

RoxieW

Hi OP
I am like you. Very low self esteem, shy and add to that a very bad blush! Although it always astounds me that people say I come across as confident!
I've had counselling and it has really helped, but you have to find the right counsellor. I've been to a few useless ones.
During counselling I learnt to get into the habit of patting myself on the back for the things that I'm good at/do well. Just get into the habit of bigging yourself up, even for the small things. It's really helped me to feel more positive about myself. It's abit odd at first but you soon get into the habit.
Another good trick I learnt was to use the 'poison parrot'. The idea is that if a parrot in a cage was squarking insults at you ie you look stupid, that was a stupid thing to say etc you can just thrown a blanket over it's cage. Apply the same thing to that little critical voice in your head, or to other people. The second a critical thought comes into my head, rather then dwell on it, I instantly think 'poison parrot' and ignore it
I'd also agree with what another poster said - try to focus on the other person and be genuinely interested in their life. The focus is off you and it also makes the other person look good.
Above all, please don't let your fears hold you back. I have done in the past and it is a slippery slope and knocks your confidence even more.
I know its hard but try to adopt a so what attitude. If you know you are a good person but someone else doesn't, so what??? Xxx