Splitting the bill...

Pink_Princess_1

I've had different experiences of this: when we go out with a group of friends we generally split the bill equally between couples, some times one of our couple friends join us and they are usually on a budget so they buy their drinks from the bar and just pay for their own meals... this has never caused problems. In another instance one time we went out as families - one couple with 2 teenagers ( me as a single parent with one) ordered their meals plus extras ( wedges, chips etc) and said to split the bill equally... we were all amazed... some people just don't care!:eek:

milkydrink

This is all crazy though is it!

Why should we fear to cause offense by NOT paying for others expensive meals & drinks?
They should fear to cause offense by thinking we should do!

esthomizzy

This problem has caused me often to try and get out of group meals and when I can't to try and eat and drink more than I really want. This is especially annoying when I am coping with the hangover . Unfortunately my crowd of friends do rounds for evenings of drinking too and are mostly pretty heavy drinkers. Since I can't afford 20odd quid rounds every time I go out any more I've opted to drink water instead and I just accept a pint when it's my boyfriends round (lucky him ). I've found that even if I say I'm really skint I'll just get my own people insist on buying you a drink anyway and then I feel bad when I don't buy a round in return. The only way is not drinking which is rubbish too. One of my friends has just become a student though so perhaps I'll suggest that her and me arrange our own little round with just two of us and leave everyone else to it.

filigree_2

I find the whole idea of group meals incredibly stressful. The group of friends I usually eat out with like pub food, which is great because you usually pay individually at the bar so no hard feelings. Other outings don't go so well...

One office party we were supposedly having a set meal that included half a bottle of wine in the price. All I had was the meal and rather nasty wine, and even that wasn't cheap. We didn't realise that others in the group were sucking down gallons of booze until the waiter handed us one huge bar bill, not itemised. The organiser (who had the grace to look embarrassed) had to ask everyone to contribute to the booze bill. I paid up because it was my husband's workmates and I didn't want to make a scene but I was furious.

One group meal should have been ok as we all had similar amounts, so everybody put in enough money for the meal, plus a couple of quid for the tip. The last bloke counted up all the money, which thanks to the "rounding up" was only £5 less than the whole bill. The scumbag only put in £5! In effect we all subsidised his meal, and the poor waitress didn't get a tip. I don't know the bloke, he was a friend-of-a-friend but in future I won't put up with that.

The most successful meal was one where we got the menu in advance and chose what we wanted when we were all sober The very efficient organiser printed off a list of all our orders, with prices, and faxed it to the restaurant. When we came to order drinks SHE took the order, wrote it down (with price) and passed it to the bar. That way we all paid for what we drank, and there was no chance of the bar staff taking advantage of us and giving us a hugely inflated bill. It worked out very well, but you need to have one extremely bossy and well organised person to make it work.

I think a lot of people are too embarrassed to make a fuss and don't want to be seen as poor or stingy, so they put up with being ripped off and seethe about it afterwards. The greedy "lobster and champagne" diners are taking the mickey :mad: Perhaps it's time the meek rose up and refused to pay!

Newly_retired

I too think it is so much better all round if each pays for their own order, but in a group from work there is always someone who says they can't abide those who want to make a fuss about sharing the bill and makes everyone else feel mean. OK if everyone has more or less the same in terms of desserts and drinks, but really it's those who take advantage of splitting the bill to be greedy who are the mean and selfish ones, turning a pleasure into a pain.

ailuro2

Jet wrote: »

What happens when you order a "family" meal and the parent with 2 kids puts in half and obviously expects the other parent to find the other half? :rolleyes:

Tricky one...

The parent with one child puts their portion in first,says there's our shre (not half). If that doesn't work, then order a bigger meal, extra desserts etc next time and when she says 'go halves' say NO, no , I'm sure mine cost more so I need to pay more- it's only fair.

roses

I went out to a hen do last year. I don't drink. I had a starter, main meal & coke which came to about £18. There were about 20 of us. When it came to the bill, it was £30 each but I put down £25 & said I didn't drink. The girl next to me (who ordered 2 jugs of cocktails for just her and her friend) gave me such a dirty look, I just wanted to slap her!

When I got out with large groups of people & they split the bill equally, I always put down less now (I put what I had plus about £5 extra) & I leave them to work out the rest.

To pay a bit extra once or twice is fine but when you are always short changed because you are a non drinker, or have a small appetite then that's when it bothers me.

I actually find that work colleagues are a lot more sensible about splitting the bills than "friends".

Shineyhappy

As far as I can see there is only one solution.... an all you can eat restaurant with refillable drinks so thats lunch at Pizza Hut with most of the drinks sold out.

I am a veggie and usually dont drink so my bill is always really cheap but I still end up splitting it equally which is hardly fair when I dont have pudding nor several pints nor chasers after dinner, but like so many others I dont stand up and say my share works out at 15 pounds not fifty. Being pretty skint now I try and avoid meals apart from birthday ones. If you say anything people seem to think you are really cheap but then they are saving money by going out with people like us!

davetrousers

Shineyhappy wrote: »

If you say anything people seem to think you are really cheap but then they are saving money by going out with people like us!

Put it back onto them by saying that they are the cheap ones for wanting to pay less than the value of their food and drinks.

milkydrink

davetrousers wrote: »

Put it back onto them by saying that they are the cheap ones for wanting to pay less than the value of their food and drinks.

EXACTLY
Say "me cheap/stingey/mean?, I'm not the freeloader, I'm happy to pay for my food &/or drink!"