Please help - Now her 'incapactity benefits' have stopped she wants me to pay!

PlayingHardball

results from the Child Support Maintenance Calculator;

You told us:

Number of children maintenance will be paid for: 1
Number of other children living in the non-resident parent's household: 2
Number of nights, on average, the non-resident parent has the child(ren): less than 52
The non-resident parent's net weekly income: £ 215
The non-resident parent is not claiming any benefits.
The weekly amount of child maintenance is approximately: £26

PlayingHardball

nickdj wrote: »

My wife hates my ex because of the way she treats me and my daughter so then saying that we have to pay her...well...she'd probably leave me because she'd be better off!

Good Grief! If she is that cold hearted I'd help her pack. YOUR FIRST daughter needs your financial support just as much as her two children! Why do so many NRP harp/go/bleat on about 'paying' the PWC? What would your ex do with this money, do you think?

Other then this, you do have my sympathies. Its not easy for thousands of us here that are having to shave back to the bare minimum just to exist in the current economical climate we find ourselves in.

C_Mababejive

I do hope that the CSA does sort it out and make you pay for your child as i for one am sick of paying for other peoples kids.

Devontrish

OP your wife won't be able to claim income support simply by dropping an hour!!!! You work too and both live in the same household, therefore not entitled to it. Even if she didn't live with you, you say she earns £100 for 16 hours...she earns too much for income support, unless they have drastically changed the rules since I was last on it.

You know, you remind me of my ex! He asked me to pay £15 for each of my children to go and stay with him for a weekend...hmmmm not his best ever moment! You may have debts, which need sorting obviously, but I am afraid that legally you are responsible for your daughter...thats not even mentioning your moral obligation. It has nothing whatsoever to do with what your ex has/has not done. Beware of the consequences your behaviour could have on your daughter...my kids haven't seen their father in over a year (his doing) and they couldn't give a monkies!!!!

Loopy_Girl

nickdj wrote: »

The original question was regarding dropping an hour in order to get income support. This makes sense in that we would probably get more that what the wife earns in that hour and we can then still see my daughter and have her stay.

What would you say if I said I'd rather have my daughter living with me and we get her benefits. I think my daughter would probably like that but not sure about the wife.

Not sure why you think you would be entitled to income support - you won't. Check the eligibility rules

http://www.turn2us.org.uk/information__resources/benefits/income_support.aspx

and I also see that you haven't mentioned any WTC/CTC you may get so I am assuming that will top up your and wife's wage.

As for your daughter staying with you - I am pretty sure that at age 13 the courts would take your daughter's wishes into consideration so if you feel that your home is a better option then this could be an avenue to pursue.

Meant to add as well that if you are struggling to the extent that you portray then I would strongly suggest you contact a debt charity to try and get you on some kind of debt management plan (or anything else they deem suitable) to allow you to live and eat.

Everyone is struggling just now but there is help out there. Or/and get yourself over to the DFW board.

Indie_Kid

15 hours on minimum wage would be too much for IS anyway.

ohdamnit

Just want To make a couple of points as an nrp, firstly not all nrp are hateful people despite the prevailing view round here. Some even pay significantly above CSa rates despite circumstances.

Secondly I am annoyed by this view that pay per view for your child is a one way street which seems to be in evidence on these boards from PWC. Fortunately for the PWC you have a means to which you can get money via CSa, slow, cumbersome and many things it may be. At least it exists and has genuine bite. For nrp who can't get access there is no body you can go who will enforce as quickly, and your only choice is to attempt the courts, which has significant problems. However I am sure from the comments round here this is seen as completely fair.

Onto original op, you are completely out of order, you need to be paying your ex the CSa amount. I doubt your income is only 215 a week, as I would expect you are getting ctc/etc and if not there is some reason why. I am not sure how your expenditure cimes about and maybe you need to post that up somewhere round here so peole can help. If nothing else you need to be managing your debt via an iva, dmp or maybe bankruptcy. All of which would give you a better standard of living than you currently claim. You need to support all your children, and if your new partner doesn't understand that then maybe she ought to leave. I pay 22% of my wage to first child PWC, despite the fact that we run up debts I'm paying for.

FBaby

I posted on your other post, but this one makes me even more bewildered. Ok, so at some point you had no contact with your daughter and you felt that in that case you shouldn't pay child support any longer. Not the way to go about it, but understanding. You say it was through no fault of yours, but I would think you are ommitting some info if the judge supported her decision...

Anyway, the situation has now changed, you are seeing your daughter regularly, yet here you are moaning how terrible your ex is for wanting for you to contribute towards your daughter. Can't you understand that what you pay for her when she is with you is nothing compared to what her mother will have to pay? Do you contribute towards her clothing, her school materials, her activities, her transport and all those other things that cost the pwc a lot more on top of food... that's what you need to contribute towards to. It seem that the pwc was ok for you not to contribute anything when she was able to support her daughter without your support. You should be grateful that you got away with it all this time rather than cry that you now have to pay. Her financial situation has now changed and she is coming to you because she NEEDS financial help. She is only asking for what is considered reasonable, that is a fair share of your income towards your daughter...

My ex doesn't pay me any maintenance either and doesn't think there is anything wrong with it. His view is that his money should go towards his new family (which includes a girlfriend who has never worked, her two boys and the baby they have on the way), and only if he has a bit left over should this go towards our two children. He sees them every week, so not like I am stopping contact. At the moment, he is doing temporary work, but I guess he thinks he is not earning enough to give me a penny towards our children. Yes he feeds them when they are there, but I buy their uniforms and shoes, pay for their lunches, pay for their childcare (£200 a month after school clubs), pay for their transport, the presents for when they are invited to parties (even when it takes place whilst they are with him), their school trips and day out, their orthodontic treatments, etc... and that comes to a LOT MORE than what he pays for a few meals.

You need to open your eyes to the reality, that is that you are putting your youngest children above your eldest. It won't be long until she realises this and if your wife can't see that what you are doing is very wrong, she is a very selfish person.

gratefulforhelp_2

ohdamnit wrote: »

Onto original op, you are completely out of order, you need to be paying your ex the CSa amount. I doubt your income is only 215 a week, as I would expect you are getting ctc/etc and if not there is some reason why. I am not sure how your expenditure cimes about and maybe you need to post that up somewhere round here so peole can help. If nothing else you need to be managing your debt via an iva, dmp or maybe bankruptcy. All of which would give you a better standard of living than you currently claim. You need to support all your children, and if your new partner doesn't understand that then maybe she ought to leave. I pay 22% of my wage to first child PWC, despite the fact that we run up debts I'm paying for.

Wanted to thank just this bit.

ohdamnit

gratefulforhelp wrote: »

Wanted to thank just this bit.

I accept I will have annoyed some people with the first rant, and really isnt an attack an all people. I, like other people who rant about !!!!!! NRPs, some times need a rant too.